Circles - Post Malone

Seventy One

A/N - I didn't like the way this ended - felt there was one more thing left to say so here's a bonus chapter.

"I want to hear that song," Dahlia says coming back into the bedroom after she has showered. Austin sits up in bed and looks at her with big eyes.

"Remember what I was saying about keeping the past in the past?"

"Yes."

"Well..."

"I am your past and you have fucked me into your future. I want to hear that song."

"You have such a wonderful way with words, baby."

"I think you are stalling. Song now," she says flopping on the bed and putting her hand out for Austin to pass her his phone. She has deleted all her phone apps including the music apps - she couldn't run the risk of a wine-drenched pitty fest while crying over his music.

"Ok, well remember I was pretty hurt and pissed off...and angry. People say things they don't mean when they are angry."

"I want to hear that song right now," Dahlia says glaring at him.

"It's so bad," he says swallowing thickly, "and people love it...its a hit," he adds. She thinks he is hoping it will soften the blow. It won't. But, she does get it. She hurt him, he is invested in his songs and they are like diary entries. If you know him personally you would be able to understand each song intricately. She has heard all his songs and has purposely shut out the words - she will have to sit down one day and listen carefully to them - some will drudge up painful memories.

"Song, Austin," she demands. "Ok. But let me get dressed first. I don't want the hotel staff to find my dead body naked - I would like to keep some dignity," he says climbing out of bed and grabbing his clothes. "Fucking hell!  Is it that bad?" Dahlia asks as he walks past her. He stops at the bathroom door and looks at her. "You said we meant nothing...that I meant nothing. What would you have said if the tables had been turned?" he says giving her a pointed look and then closing the door. She would not have said anything, she would have just stabbed him in the fucking eye.

He is right though. What she had said had been harsh - no one deserved what she had said to him and now that she knows how he had felt for all these years - her words feel like acid. She feels sick just thinking about what she said. Her hands shake as she reaches out for his phone - the words in that song can't be any less toxic that the words she had stupidly said to him in the fucking ally. She flicks open his phone and checks his messages - she is nosy. It's who she is and he knows she would snoop. He also knows she is going to listen to that song while he is in the bathroom. Hence why he has hidden in there the cowardly asshole.

His messages are boring. He speaks only to his friends and to some big shot agents - from what she gathers Austin and the band are climbing fucking fast. The man is becoming the shit in Hollywood. No messages to any girls, there are some messages from girls - a lot actually, but he hasn't bothered replying to them. Good boy. His social life is boring so she closes his messages and opens his music app, pulling up the song - I fall apart - fucking morbid title, fuck.  She starts it and then throws his phone on the bed while she paces and listens to the words carefully. The song is fucked up. It's scathing and aimed straight at her throat. Each word cuts like a knife and the pain in his voice as he sings is like salt in the wounds. She goes through a range of emotions. Sad, angry, shocked, denial, acceptance, embarrassed - he lays their relationship and breakup out for the world to hear and she was the villain. She is the villain. The world does not know who he is singing about but their friends do, she does, and it fucking hurts.

When the song comes to an end and silence fills the room all Dahlia can do is stand and stare at the phone on the bed. She hears the bathroom door open quietly and when she turns she sees a sheepish-looking Austin leaning on the doorframe, he can't look at her.

"You called me whore...and a devil...yet it feels like you were holding back."

"I was angry...hurt. Your words had killed me."

"My hands want to kill you right now...but...I understand. I don't want to. I want to be offended and I want to tear into you...but I understand."

"Wanna hug it out?"

"Not unless you want to run the risk of also punching it out. May be best to keep your distance for a second."

Austin sucks in his lips and nods, he stays leaning on the doorframe. "You had every right to write that song, to find a way to deal with what I had said and did to you - but it still hurts to know I was the bad guy, the fucking idiot," Dahlia says running her hands through her hair and wiping angrily at the tears on her face. "I'm sorry, baby," Austin says pushing off the doorframe and pulling her into his arms. "I don't think you were the bad guy. I never thought that. We are good people - just got a little lost that's all," Austin says. "On the plane ride over here some kid and a noisy toy, it drove me fucking mad so while his parents were engrossed in their conversation I stole it, poured my water into it so it short-circuited, and then gave it back to him. When he realized he was gutted...but it was quiet. I don't think I am a good guy," Dahlia sniffles.

"You are softening over time, baby steps. Look at you already - crying like a baby into my chest. It's almost pathetic," Austin chuckles then holds her tighter when she tries to move away from him - she does not try very hard. "Some stuff does not make sense in the song. You say you got me jewelry...you never bought me jewelry," she sniffles into his chest. She is such a fucking baby right now, but Austin makes her soft - it's annoying. "I did," Austin says softly. Dahlia lifts her head from his chest and looks up at him with a confused face, she has no recollection of any jewelry. Austin's face has turned into a mixture of nervousness and sheepishness as he bites his lip and looks down at her.

"Have you been confusing me with another woman this whole time? Because if-"

"Just shut the fuck up, baby," he says rolling his eyes and then grinning at her. He lets go of her with one hand while keeping her plastered to him with the other, shoving his now free hand into his pocket and pulling out a ring. "I bought you this, been carrying it around in my pocket for a long time," he says pinching the ring between two fingers and holding it in front of her face. "What's the ring for?" she breathes out. "You are a clever girl, you will figure it out. You wanna wear this for a while?" he whispers, still grinning. He takes Dahlia's hand, slipping it onto her ring finger. Dahlia would say something but she is crying like a fucking baby still.

He wants to keep her forever? 

"Well, fuck," is all she manages to get out eventually. "Let's not make a big deal about this, ok? We'll just sign a paper and have a drink," Austin says, still fucking grinning. "Ok," Dahlia sniffles and hiccups.

"Oh, you are soft."

"Fuck off, Austin."