Circles - Post Malone

Thirty Two

"Hi, you Dahlia?"

"Maybe..."

"I am Nessy."

"Then I am Dahlia."

Nessy lets out a little laugh as she sits down at the bar. "Well it's lovely to meet you Dahlia...not sure how to go about this, I don't think I will make a very good teacher. You will be my first student," Nessy says. Dahlia frowns at her, "then why are you doing it?"  Nessy lets out another little laugh. Dahlia hates people who constantly let out little laughs.  "Because Austin asked me to," Nessy says and again lets out a little laugh. "And do you do everything Austin asks you to?" Dahlia asks. Nessy lets out another little laugh. Dahlia will murder her soon. "I would do anything he asks," Nessy answers. Well fuck. Another girl after Austin, surprise, surprise.

"I will just get my camera," Dahlia turns and picks up her phone, flicking a text to Austin.

I hate her

So? You hate everyone. Be nice.

His text comes back immediately. He must have been waiting for her to text him.  Dahlia sighs and puts her phone back in her pocket then gives a thumbs up to Andy who is taking over his shift at the bar. She picks up the camera and spins to face Nessy. "I don't know what Austin has told you, but I know nothing about cameras," she says placing the camera down in front of Nessy. Nessy inspects the camera box and then whistles softly, "pretty expensive camera, good quality. This will get you far. Ok so before we even start on the camera tell me what kind of photographer you want to be?" Nessy asks. There are different types? Dahlia shrugs, "one that takes pictures...I don't know."

Nessy lets out a little laugh and Dahlia practices her breathing. Violence is not the answer. "I mean what type of things do you want to photograph? Where do you want your career to go in photography?" Nessy says. Dahlia is starting to get frustrated now. She does not see the point in this silly line of questions. "I don't fucking know. Your questions are annoying by the way," she says. Maybe photography was a stupid idea. She should have just kept her mouth shut.

"Umm, ok. How about this? How does taking photos at a wedding or a sweet 16 or a prom sound to you?"

"Like being in the depths of hell."

"Ok, so not an events photographer then. How about photoshoots on the beach with families?"

"Gateway to jumping off a bridge."

"Ok so no to capturing family memories. Do you like babies?"

"Despise them."

"Animals?"

"Prefer them to humans, but still a hard no."

Nessy sighs in defeat and taps the camera box in thought. Dahlia watches her. After a few minutes, Dahlia can see a dull light flicker in her eyes when she gets an idea, and then she smiles at Dahlia. "Describe what a perfect day in the workplace would be for you," Nessy says.

"I don't fucking know." 
 
"Just say the first thing that makes you happy at the thought. There is no right or wrong answer."

"Fine. I want to be able to not speak unless I feel like it.  I want to be able to swear and shout and have people do what I say without them wanting to have an open line of communication. I don't want people giggling and throwing glitter around like life is a fucking party. I want to be left alone when I fucking ask. I want moody, fast-paced gloom with a hint of color at random times...for fun."

"Ok, weirdly specific and morbid but, I have the perfect job for you," Nessy says sliding off her chair and then running outside. She comes back ten minutes later with a pile of fashion magazines and lays them down on the bar. "A fashion photographer," she says proudly. "Fuck off. I don't know the first thing about fashion," Dahlia says pulling her face. "That's the beauty of it. You don't need to know anything about fashion. You need to know how to take amazing photos and I can teach you the basics. You also need to have thick skin, a sharp mouth, and not be afraid to tell off the people you photograph," Nessy says. Dahlia picks up the magazine and flips through it. She can do that. She likes the thought of doing that. It would be like going to therapy.

"Do you want to know what the best part would be?" Nessy asks. Dahlia is intrigued. "The best part is the models are like zombies they are either drugged up, stupid, or just plain rude so they won't want to enter into a conversation with you. They just want you to tell them how to pose and then they will be on their way," Nessy says. Dahlia can't help the smile that spreads across her face at the thought. This is her dream job. This sounds like the perfect place to work for the rest of her life. "Yes. Fashion photographer - that's what I want to do," she says. Nessy lets out a little laugh and this time Dahlia does not want to murder her.

For the rest of the afternoon, Nessy shows Dahlia how to use her new camera. It's a lot to take in but Dahlia is bright - learning new things was never hard for her. As the afternoon wears on she finds that whatever had drawn her to photography in the first place has slowly turned into a passion and an obsessive need to be the best photographer she can be. It's after five by the time Nessy calls the lesson to an end. She agrees to meet Dahlia every day for an hour after her shift for the next three months. "Thank you, Nessy. I appreciate that," Dahlia says genuinely. "No biggie...like I said - I would do anything for Austin," Nessy says. Dahlia's stomach drops. Oh shit, she did not think that Nessy was that much of a problem to worry about but it seems she is willing to work pretty hard for Austin's attention. Presumably, as soon as Austin is on board with Dahlia he will move on to Nessy.

"If you don't mind me asking...how much is Austin paying you to teach me?" Dahlia asks. Nessy lets out another one of her stupid little laughs. "Oh he is not paying me anything but we have made an arrangement," she says, putting the word arrangement in air quotations. Dahlia's stomach drops. He wouldn't. Would he? They made a deal - no sleeping with other people. She knows they are not in a relationship but she trusted him. This can't be right. She is going to kill him. "Ok well, I better go. Austin has got me and my friends a reserved front-row table at his show with free drinks from the bar. 
I do not want to be late," Nessy says standing, "see you tomorrow!" she shouts over her shoulder as she dashes out.

Dahlia sighs and gathers up all her stuff. Her excitement about the future feels like it has been dashed and shipwrecked across the jagged rocks of life. "Stop overthinking and fucking ask him," Paris says his head down as he continues to shade in one of his sketches. "But we are not in a relationship," Dahlia bites back. "That does not mean you don't deserve to be respected, Dahlia," Orlando bites back equally as harshly. They are both right. Fuck that. He had such a bitch fit about her going on a date and yet here he is making 'deals' with millions of girls all over New York.

After his show, she will confront him and he better have the right fucking answer.