To distract from the fact I haven't posted in a while, here's some meaningless handpicked... works of art.
Y/n: Where are my fucking keys?
Pearl: Y/n, Steven is around, can you say it a little nicer?
Y/n: May I ascertain the whereabouts of my FUCKING KEYS??
...
Steven: Do crabs think people walk sideways?
Y/n: ...Steven, what the heck.
...
Y/n: Hey, are you free?
Amethyst: No, I'm expensive.
...
Amethyst: What would Pearl think?
Y/n: Ok, that's an interesting thought, but hear me out: what if... we ran an experiment where we spent the rest of our lives finding out what happened if we never told her?
...
Steven: What makes you all smile?
Garnet: Friends.
Amethyst: Snacks.
Pearl: Victory and success.
Y/n: Face muscles.
...
Amethyst: I've done a lot of dumb stuff.
Garnet: I witnessed the dumb stuff.
Y/n: I recorded the dumb stuff.
Steven: I joined you in the dumb stuff.
Pearl: I TRIED TO STOP YOU FROM DOING THE DUMB STUFF.
...
*The Squad is eating dinner*
Y/n: Can you pass the salt?
Amethyst: *throws Pearl across the table*
...
Okay, okay, a couple more. These are kinda sorta fun.
Steven: So, what's it like living with Lapis?
Y/n: She once referred to sand as "heterosexual glitter."
Steven: ...
Y/n: I love her so much.
...
Lapis: Please pray for Y/n.
Steven: What happened to them?
Lapis: Nothing, they're just very stupid.
...
Pearl, trying to impress Garnet: I re-initialized the entire command structure, retaining all programmed abilities but deleting the supplementary preference architecture.
Y/n: She turned it off and back on again.
...
Steven: That's the longest worm I've ever seen.
Y/n: That's a snake.
...
Y/n: You're charged with.....breaking into a pet store?
Steven: I thought the animals might be lonely.
...
Garnet: The odds of this happening by coincidence are vanishingly small.
Y/n: I would say infinitesimally.
Amethyst: And I'd say teenily-weenily. We all know words.
...
See you guys next fall!
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(POSSIBLY CANCELLED,,) Steven universe x reader || "Impossible"
FanfictionImpossible- adj. not able to occur, exist, or be done. Y/n hasn't ever been far from home, however, they move to Beach City. Nice place, good people, but Y/n has a fateful encounter with a certain someone which cements their fate as a guardian. Wil...
