Problem Kid

Chapter 85

I hardly sleep all night so it's no surprise that I'm awake before anyone else in the house. I lay in silence for a moment, only the sound of Jimmy lightly snoring beside me to break the stillness of the house. When I finally check my watch, it's 6am. No one has any alarms set until 7am so I'm safe for an hour. I slowly sit up, making sure to slide off of the bed carefully and quietly so that I don't disturb Jimmy. I quickly pull my handbag out from under the bed, taking the tests out and leaving the rest of the bag behind, and grab my toiletries bag from on top of my chest of drawers before slowly leaving the room and closing the door behind myself. Not even Summer wakes up. I make zero noise as I go into the downstairs bathroom and close the door behind myself. I need to pee. And I need to do this test.

I take both tests out of their wrappers. The one from last night is the exact same, one strong line and one faint one. I carefully do the second test, making sure to follow the instructions exactly right. After putting the cap back on it, I place it inside of the wrapper behind the taps on the sink. I begin cleaning my makeup off slowly and then wash my face. Next, I brush through my hair which is an absolute mess from tossing and turning all night. I don't even know how Jimmy slept through it. I go through my different face washes in my bag to try and pass as much time as possible, as long as I can keep myself busy until I have to look at my test. But finally, my face is clean as can be and I've ran out of things to do to pass time. It's been ten minutes. I take the test, still wrapped up, in my hand and sit down on the closed toilet lid. Inhale, exhale, it's time. I pull it out of the wrapper, this time I don't even look away. I need to know.

One strong pink line.

And one, not as strong but still very clearly there, second pink line.

There's no avoiding it. I'm pregnant. I am 100% pregnant. Fuck...

More silent tears stream down my face, my hand clamped over my mouth to keep myself silent. I sit there and cry for the next twenty minutes until I finally manage to get myself together again. I splash some cold water on my face and stare into the mirror taking a deep breath in as I stare at a girl I don't even recognize any more looking straight back at me.

How am I even pregnant in the first place? I didn't get my period back yet. I've only recently gained the weight to be better and I'm still slightly below the healthy BMI. And I'm on the damn pill!!! I just don't get it... Does the world hate me this much? I sigh and turn around to stare into the full length mirror, pulling my pyjama top off and turning to the side. I rest my hand on my stomach. Sure, it doesn't look any different visibly but there's something in there... There's an embryo growing inside of me...

I put my t-shirt back on and stand there for a moment, unsure what to do. I know I need to tell Jimmy. I have to. But not yet... I can't...

Instead, I need to do something to get my mind off of this. I leave the bathroom and walk into the kitchen. I'll make breakfast, that's what I'll do! I quickly shove the tests into the bottom of my toiletries bag before heading out of the bathroom. I quickly place my bag back into the bedroom, waking Summer up in the process who follows me into the kitchen where I begin pulling things out of the fridge, freezer and cupboards. Bacon, eggs, black pudding, bread, hash browns, tomatoes,  mushrooms. I begin to heat up two pans as I sort everything out. First, the hash browns go into the oven. Then, in the first pan, I put bacon and sausages. The second, mushrooms and tomatoes. The veg finishes first so I put it all on a plate and cover it with foil to keep it warm before cracking eggs into the second pan. Just as everything is about to finish, Sam and Jack head downstairs into the kitchen.

"Hey! I've make breakfast!" I say, smiling. They look tired and confused.

"Oh wow, thanks Ev that looks good," they say, sitting down just as I serve them their plates. Just after I place them on the table, Maya walks in.