A Land of Tales and Dreams

Thanos is married??

WEEK 117

Prompt:

It turns out your character is the chosen one. Not to save the world. To be the one it needs saving from.

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Gerald began to laugh maniacally. Oh, just how far he had fallen? It had to be ten feet at least. But it was on a trampoline, so he just bounced back. He was scared: the trampoline bounced him higher than the clouds, and out to the outer space.

He held his breath and transformed into Thanos. "I need food!" he cried.

"You're on a diet!" his wife shouted back.

He Thanos snapped her away so that he could eat whatever he pleased. And so his villain arc began. He ate his favorite food, laughed, and then choked. He coughed out the offending morsel and found that it was an engagement ring. But he didn't want to get married! "What in the Saturn is going on here!"

Thanos' wife turned up again, getting down on her knees and saying, "How you doin'?"

Thanos placed his palm to his face, utter disbelief filling his expression. His wife hadn't spoken to him for three years, now, and had just casually talked to him. This may seem an incongruity at first, dear readers, but he did in fact have two wives—this one did not know of the former. Or so he thought (insert dramatic gasp from Editor Dreams).

"D... Darling, are you really talking to me?" said Thanos, almost tearing up.

"No. I will take my ring and be on my way," she said crossly, holding out her hand.

Thanos flew away to a random galaxy, far, far away, and did not give her the tring. Thanos' wife went and hired the Disney legal team to get the ring back. They recruited the Earth's mightiest heroes to help track him down.

When they did, they saw Thanos playing poker at the casino. They arrested him, as gambling was intergalactically illegal.