Vents Hidden in Verse

beautiful 🎶

A/N: it's been a while since i've written. i'm in college now. i've been panicking about not feeling like i fit in but then i listened to this song. at first, it felt like romantic yearning, as this is a romantic song. but the more i listened to it... you'll see.

🎶 currently playing: The Most Beautiful Thing by Thomas Headon 🎶

written September 16th, 2023 at 2:30 p.m.

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how lovable am i?
i pride myself on the fact that i might be,
on the fact that i am one in a million,
one in a billion,
but am i really?

i think to myself,
"am i just another dime-a-dozen
little girl?"

then,
in doubt,
i get a moment alone to myself.

there are times like these when i realize
that i only have to be enough for myself.

i have been so caught up
in wanting to be right for someone lately,
but the being is all that's necessary.

and i yearn and i yearn
for that fairy-tale ending.
more than anyone i've ever known.
i know, in reality,
the only one i need to be saved by is myself.

it doesn't matter
if i am the most beautiful thing
to somebody else.
i wouldn't want to be anyone else.

i can be beauty without a beholder.

i look so hard in the mirror.
my heart swells,
seeing a child living her life,
seeing how free she is.
seeing all the self-hatred and disdain
turn into butterflies
that dance around in her stomach
instead of wasps that crowd her headspace.

do it.
dance around in nothing,
read your romance novels,
sing your little heart out.
release your inhibitions.

this one is dedicated to her.
the world doesn't deserve her mind.