The MakeUp Artist Internship

Deliberately Defiant

I did go over to Peter's and he is just the medicine for cramps. He rubbed my belly and even masturbated me to an orgasm, which felt good. He didn't pressure me. I don't think he was the period type sex guy. He just made sure i was comfortable.

"How do you feel Jade?"

"Cramps, kind of sick, but I always do."

"No. Mentally. Are you okay?"

"Yes."

"How is Charisse?"

"We are going to the Co-Op tomorrow. She wants to make me vegan."

"Really?  Well, come over here and have some steak." I giggled. "You know that you are going to have to break it to her."

"Yes. She thinks it's an error on my part."

"Hey, she didn't know your cycle."

He always made me feel better. I spent the night. Again.

The next day I went to work. I got a nasty text at work. "Hey, I know you weren't home last night and it would be appreciated that you let me know. I know you're fucking around on me, Jade. You are such a whore, but I still want you to have the baby then give it to me. We're going to the store."

I talked to mom and she said that Jeff was sick and Johnny was going to England to be with him. She was crying. I went to be with her. I wanted to be with her. This infuriated CHarisse and she called me a "fucking cunt" and that I was "purposely being defiant". My mom needed me. So, I stayed with her until Johnny got to England and I stayed the night. Charisse texted me at least one hundred times saying how "rude and selfish" I was. I called Peter. "I hope your mom is okay," he says, "Johnny, too." I thanked him and I sobbed. I felt bad for Johnny because he was crying. Peter talked to me so calmly, so kindly.

"I just feel so bad for your dad," mom said. "He was crying like a little boy."

"I love you mom."  I texted him and told him I loved him.  

"I don't know what I will do if Jeff dies. Johnny will be so lost. That is his best friend. That is his brother."

"I know. Dad will be crushed."

"I love him so much and don't want him to do anything rash. I don't think he will, but he helped out your dad so much."

I stayed with my mom that night. I felt I needed to. There were consequences. I texted Peter and he said, "Do the right thing, stay with her. I will see you soon. If not Saturday."

"Sure," I texted back.

I went to work. It was Friday and I was ready for the weekend. It was going to be cold, gray, and flurries would come and go. I stayed with my Mom Wednesday and Thursday. I drove to Charisse's, and then we would be going over to Peter's house. She made sure that I knew I was wearing a bra and a blouse "You can't get too turned on. We also need to go to the co op and make better choices." Charisse was trying to be kind.

"So, how is Jeff?"

"He's not well."

"Too bad."

"I feel bad for Johnny."

"Well, yeah, whose coattails does he have to ride on now?"

"That was shitty, Charisse."

"It's true!"

"It isn't!"

"You sound like a baby. I don't think you need to have a baby. I am looking."

I didn't say a thing. If she wanted to she could.

"Now, let's get some nourishing food for you," she said.

We drove to the co-op on Livingston Avenue. It was full of older people from the generation of love. The place was dirty, but this was where the healthiest of the healthy shopped. She got lots of greens and vegan things. She also got me some "non chemical soap" so I would not "stink". "Your crevices were kind of stinky today," she told me. "Well I have been at my moms and I care for her more than if I stink or not," I said. She said, "Peter will bitch at me again", which I knew was a lie. He told me, "It kind of turns me on, as it is you." I kept my mouth shut.   I began to wonder how truthful Charisse was with me.   

     "This is good.  Indian food is mostly vegan," she put them in the cart.

"Indian food gives me the runs,"  I said.

"Jade!   Quit being defiant!"

"I'm not."

"I think so."

     We went and got some salad greens after the frozen food.   I was going to eat a lot of green shit.   We paid for the food and got in the car and dad texted me, "I love you, too."   

      "Jade, I don't even know why you are with me.  I know you are fucking around on me.  I think it's a male.  I think it's your roomate.  You have never been faithful to me, mentally or physically."  

"The text is from my dad.   Look, I will get my paint and go.   I think we need to break up."

"Please, no.  I want to work this out.  I think we need therapy and I have hired Dr. Gilbert, a friend of mine.  I want this to be fixed.   She said you are being infantile."

     Infantile.  I just wanted out.   At that moment, I felt trapped.   I wanted to rush to Peter's arms, but I told him about it, and he said, "Fuck".  I told him that Jeff was sick and Johnny was distraught and he said, "Oh, honey.  I know we can't meet until next week, but keep me posted." I told him I would.  I was going to therapy tomorrow at six pm.   "They know we work," she said.   "You have a lot of work to do and the past few weeks you have been quite immature and very frustrating,  I don't know WHY?"

     I wanted to say, "Because I am fucking the baby maker more than every Saturday."  I told her, "I will be spotting Saturday, better tell him to bring a towel."   She said, "Of course.   You'd better get pregnant soon.   After the baby, we're done.   I will have my piece of Johnny Depp.   You know, I never really loved you."

      "Then I will have Paul draw up papers.   I want this baby, too."   

"We shall see.   Paul is an idiot."   

     It was on.