Expression of My Love

We All Fall

Fast forward to 2 years later. Felix and Hyunjin were still going strong, however, because of their status as idols, especially in the same group, their relationship could never be public. Han and Minho had also gone through their own journey figuring out what they were... but more on that later.

A/N: for the sake of the story there has to be a villain, I do not believe or want to suggest that this is the character in real life!

*Felix POV*

We just completed a tour and everyone is extremely burnt out. Thankfully that means that we get some time off to recharge.

Things have been good with Hyunjin, honestly not much has changed except now we kiss in front of the members, to their dismay I may add.

But during the tour Hyunjin lost his set of our couple rings, he was devistated that the first couple thing we had, that meant so much to me, that we never took off, was lost somewhere in a crowd of people.

In the meantime I split mine so that we each had one. I kind of prefer this honestly.

There was something that had been on my mind though, and I hated going around in circles with it. I had been getting a strange vibe from Changbin. It started feeling like our whole dynamic changed in the group.

Hyunjin swears up and down that there is absolutely nothing going on with Changbin. I know that Hyunjin is amazing, and that he is mine, but I get so jealous at their relationship sometimes. I know I shouldn't, I mean I am the one that ends up in his bed and can feel his touches and lips, but I have been struggling with something that complicates matters further.

You see, although our relationship was no longer a secret with the membes or the staff, it could not be revealed to the public. Something like that, especially 2 male idols from the same group, coming out would be a huge scandal. And unfortunately for us, the eyes are the window to the soul. And my soul was Hyunjin... and I was his.

The staff prevented us from touching eachother during lives, they said it was becoming too obvious and too romantic. We never got the chance to interact much and were always seperated into different teams. It was really hard to pretend like nothing was wrong when I had to ignore him. Stays being Stays also started to catch on and we got a lot of questions about our relationship. Both of us even got angry messages from fans, accusig us of hurting the other.

I was terrible at hiding my jealousy, Hyunjin was always paired with Changbin and their ship became popular. Its really hard to ignore the rumors and be set in your belief that there is nothing going on when people are reading into every small glance.

I knew that Changbin liked Hyunjin. He had always been open about the fact that Hyunjin is a very attractive dude and was not afraid to flirt with him. I couldn't hide my jealousy anymore when Changbin got way too close to Hyunjin's face during an interview. I could have fought him right then and there, but I was not about to risk the group over his lack of boundaries.

*Hyunjin POV*

During the interview when discussing the mole under my eye Changbin got really close, surprising me in the process. I had to laugh it off to keep it lighthearted, but I could feel the daggers being sent my way from Felix behind us. Man am I gonna be in trouble later. I glanced at Felix and he looked pissed. I wish I could go to him right now but I have to just trust that he can keep his composure.

After the interview ended we were all on our way out when Felix grabbed Changbin forcefully and pushed him against the wall. I had never seen this side of Felix, seeing him this jealous was both captivating and scary at the same time.

"What the hell were you doing?!" Felix's voice was scary deep.

"What?!" He asked innocently, but deep down there was a menacing tone behind it.

Chan pulled Felix off of Changbin and kept them apart by holding both off with his hands.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about!" Felix glared at Changbin. If looks could kill we would be down a member right now.

"Relax, it was just a joke. Stays will love it" he said with a smirk, I swear I could see smoke coming out of Felix's ears.

"That's enough!" Chan boomed at both of them. "Now Changbin, dude you went too far." He lowered his voice slightly to avoid upsetting Felix further "one misplaced turn and we would all be in a world of trouble right now, JYP killing us if Felix did not get to it first".

I went to Felix and wrapped my arms around him, trying to calm him down. "And you" Chan faced to Felix, "we are not teenagers anymore, you can't fly off the handle like that" Chan's face was stern but softened once he saw Felix's eyes start to water.

Felix shrugged me off and left to the dorms. I give Changbin a glare and roll my eyes, running after Felix.

Back at the dorms:

*Felix POV*

"That bastard" I mumble, pacing back and forth in the room. I know that he is enjoying it and it pisses me off. I hear a knock at the door.

"What?!" I yell, really not in the mood to talk to anyone.

"Felix it's me... open up.." I hear Hyunjin's voice, it sounds more soft and fragile. I exhale deeply to cool off a bit and open the door, not waiting before turning back around and walking away from him.

"Look I'm not mad at you, but I need some time to think." I couldn't look at him. I know that if I see the obvious hurt expression on his face that I would lose it.

"Ok..." I hear him say softly, his voice breaking. "Just please talk to me whenever you're ready to.. I hate seeing you like this" he sounded broken. I heard soft footsteps walking away from me and the door close slowly behind. I sat on the floor with my head between my knees and just cried.

I am so tired of having to hide.

*Hyunjin POV*

Before long the others came back, Changbin looked upset but his eyes showed pride. I glared at him and was about to get up when I felt hands on my shoulders keeping me down.

"Whatever you are thinking, don't. We don't need you getting kicked out. He is not worth it" Minho said, his voice completely flat, showing me that he was just as pissed off but he was right.

I turned my head around. "Hey Chanbin.." he turned to face me, a disgusting innocent look on his face.

"Try something again and I swear to god I will make sure you never step foot in these dorms again. Got it?!"
Changbin's expression dropped slightly, a slight sense of daring masked underneith. I clenched the pillow with my fist and took deep breaths to calm down.

Felix's door opened slightly, his eyes were yes and he had his arms crossed hugging himself.

"Hyunjin, can you come here please?" He said. I nodded and got up, closing the door behind us.

"Angel I'm so sor-" Felix cut me off, backing away as I walked to him. My heart dropped.

"I don't know if I can do this anymore..."