Big Trouble, Little Necluda
!Zelda The Lost Woods
Let's discuss deja vu, shall we?
It occurred when Impa, my dear advisor and long-time friend, alerted me to sightings of guardian hordes charging east from Scott's Hill.
I alerted Riju and Teba to request the assistance of Vah Naboris and Vah Medoh. Despite my best efforts to remain equable, visions of a not-too-distant past torment me.
Majora plays an intelligent game. Distract the divine beasts so that the moon continues to lie vulnerable to his ploy.
My sincerest hope was that our fierce deity guardian would have attacked him and ended this charade.
But it appears Y/N has stolen the attention of yet another version of Link.
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The sound of heavy boots stomping among moist soil made you surveillance the ground around you.
Well, what little you could see of it.
"There's footprints here. We already came this way."
The deity grunted as he swung you around on his other shoulder. Your wrists and ankles tickled from the synthetic fibers of the rope he had hog-tied you with. You let out a helpless sigh.
"This would be so much easier if you just untied me."
"Show me trust, and I'll show you freedom."
"Look," you began, "it's clear that I obviously can't run away from you being as you're a freak of nature and can teleport."
You could attest to your statement. You tried three times to escape the deity, who seemed to take nothing but great pleasure in deriding you. It was the third time that had awarded you with the displeasure of being tied upside down like a pig in a shop window that had just been smoked.
The deity snorted, his usual signal that he was listening to your whining. You continued to rebuke him. "So, if I clearly cannot escape, why go through such lengths and tie me up?"
When there was no response, you started on him again. "I don't even know why you brought me here. I've never even been to the Lost Woods. We've been traveling for miles, and all I see are the same wide boot prints in the mud. This fog doesn't help. And then there's the fact-" Your stomach gurgled into his ear, finishing your sentence for you.
"What was that abhorrent sound?"
"Well, excuse me, deity, but as a human, I require food; otherwise, my body will rebel."
He snarled, "Do you ever shut the hell up?"
He walked over to a splintered log and plopped you down on the smoothest indent of it. "What about the apples I fed you?"
Your stomach protested against the idea of digesting another apple with a surly roar. "I need protein! Protein is what keeps us full, not some fruit that's mostly water!"
He sat down beside you, lifting you up and seating you on his knee. "What are you-"
He whirled his hand in a circle, and a succulent Cucco leg glistening with fat appeared in front of you. "Eat." He demanded.
"You can't at least untie my hands to eat? How absurd! What could I possibly do with my-" He shoved the Cucco leg against your lips, silencing you. "Bite." He ordered with the same callous voice.
YOU ARE READING
Autumn in Akkala
Fanfiction***I've been wanting to write this for AWHILEEEEE! I'm a little late to this party but due to TOTK season upon us, I thought of this fun little fanfic that is BOTW x MM. I might be back on my smut writing a bit too ;)*** The calamity has perished, a...
