DARE 💖 Style

Chapter Twenty-Nine 💖

Saturday, May 29th
Stan's POV
2112 Words
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Last night, I couldn't stop thinking of Kyle. I hardly even slept.

I know I shouldn't be this upset over losing him, given the fact that I was the one that accepted that dare and messed everything up, but I still miss him, and god do I still want him.

Yeah, sure, we're super best friends, but I miss being his boyfriend more than anything in the whole world.

He was always so kind and trusting, and he always knew how to make me feel loved better than anybody ever has. Now, all I can wish is that I could just take it all back. Not accept the dare and ask him out for real, be with him for real, have none of this happen. But of course, wishes don't come true, especially when it comes to wishes involving the past.

I glanced over at my phone as I felt it buzz. I grabbed it, taking it off the charger, seeing what it was. It ended up just being some YouTube notification. I sighed, glancing at the time. I had barely gotten a wink of sleep and it was already 9am.

I just wanted to keep my mind off things, so I started scrolling on Instagram. I was hoping to ease my mind by doing this, but somehow I wound up on David's profile. I looked through his pictures, they were really nothing special, just a bunch with his family. But of course, there were some highlights he had on his page with pictures of him and Kyle together. I felt my blood boil.

Why am I so jealous? Why can't I just be happy that he's moved on from me and found someone that's almost a million times better? Even after making up, I feel like my late night thoughts haven't changed much. If anything, they've gotten worse and more frequent. It's like no matter how hard I try, I can't help but think of him whenever I'm laying in this empty bed by myself. I miss his hugs, his cuddles, his kisses, our dates. But of course, I had to fuck it up, and I had to ruin everything. Now he does that with David. My heart throbbed at that thought.

I looked through more and more of the highlights, which I realized was a horrible idea. They looked so happy together! Now I just wanted to throw my phone at the wall or something. I huffed, shutting it off. It was getting to be too much to handle, so I just got up.

I went to the bathroom, intending to use it, but I stopped at the mirror and stared at my reflection. My hair was messy, and I had eye bags that were nearly as dark as my hair. I looked like a zombie.

I turned away from the mirror and did what I went in there to do before going back to staring at my reflection. I didn't say a word but mentally, I was nitpicking myself and every little detail there was to dislike about how I looked. I looked like crap, and the eye bags did me no favors. I feel like ever since Kyle and I broke up, I haven't slept properly in a really, really long time. I'm always just tired and constantly wanting to drink... I haven't drunk in a month or two, and I'm trying to keep off of alcohol, but I feel like I'm probably going to end up relapsing sometime soon.

My life is in shambles because I can't just get over the long done past. What is wrong with me?

I turn away and walk out, changing my clothes. I went back to the bathroom and brushed my hair and even my teeth too. I then sighed, walking out. I walked to the kitchen, and Kyle was standing there leaning on the counter and staring at his phone with a huge smile, his cheeks a little flushed.

"What are you so smiley about?" I asked, sounding a little ruder than I intended. "Oh, it's just David." He tells me, blushing, "He wants me to go to his place because he has a surprise for me!" Kyle told me with a big smile, looking excited.

I bit the inside of my cheek after hearing that. "Oh.. Uh.. How are things going with you guys?" I asked. I probably sound nosy, but I'm just curious. "It's actually going super amazing..! We're taking things slow, but honestly I like it better that way. He's so sweet and caring.." Kyle told me with a happy sigh.