BROKEN VOW TRILOGY: 2 (Never Broke Me Again)

25: Harriet Denise Santibañez

" bad news "

Siguro nung umulan ng karupukan, dilat na dilat ang mga mata kong sinasalo ang lahat.

I hate myself for losing again to him.

I hate how I easily bend all my words and found myself in this situation.

Kissing him.

Hard.. slow...fast...and crying.

Believing that we are actually doing it now is such a surreal kind of emotion.

I can't believe that for four years that I've been chasing that man who happen to hate me so much for loving him, now I can say that finally.. I have him.

Kanina 'nung makita ko siyang umiyak dahil sa'kin, hindi ko akalain na posible palang magkatotoo yung pinapangarap ko noon.

Kaya lang nang nangyari na sa wakas, masyado na akong napuruhan sa sakit. To the point na kahit nangyayari na talaga yung matagal ko ng inaasam noon pa man, ngayon ang hirap ng paniwalaan ang lahat.

But as I feel his lips on my lips. All the pain that I am feeling these past years suddenly vanished.

I am crying for I'm afraid that if this kiss end, the pain will come back and I will end up pushing him again away from me.

Nang tumigil kami sa paghahalikan, huminga ako ng malalim.

Magkalapat pa'rin ang mga noo namin. Only giving small spaces in each other as I can feel also his fingers trailed off unto my tears on my face.

He wipe it off slowly as he is breathing in labor.

For one last try.. I want to escape this.

Because I know after this, all those pain will come back again. Will remind me of why I should stop and never push this anymore.

I try to get off myself from his touch, but I do not have any strength left in me to do it.

I think I'm glued at this moment. Time stops and I just happen to feel this. Not feeling any pain at all.

" I'm sorry..."

He whisper and for one last time, I want to feel the sincerity of his apology.

" I'm sorry Harriet.."

He kissed me again.

This time in a much slower and sincere way.

Hindi ko alam kung ilang minuto ang itinagal ng halikan yun.

It feels like eternity.. and I want to be selfish for wanting to live in this moment.

I want more..more of this.

I want to be selfish again for wanting more of him now.

I am so overwhelmed with the kiss to the point I didn't mind anymore what will happen to us next of this kiss.

I just become aggressive.

I kiss him again. I want to send a message to him that I want more than just these kisses.

I want more of him.

I want to brand him as mine as this would be the start that I'm losing control from myself.

" Harriet..."

I want to believe that his hesitation to continue is a sign that he can't do it.

But when he pulled me closer to him and respond wildly to my kisses.. the next thing happen to us is insanely beyond our control anymore.