It's classification day for Riley. he is finally 18 but when he gets his results things turn for the worst quickly when he has to stay with his brother until he gets assigned a Caregiver.
Emily is 20 and has been a Mommy without a little for 2 year...
I had never been to the park before... It was a lot bigger than I thought it would be but it looks fun. All the colors are bright and beautiful. As much as I wish Emily was here I'm okay going with granny and pop pop.
"Stay where we can see you" Granny points her finger at me so I know she is serious. I nod gently and pop pop ruffles my hair gently before I get to run off. I start by playing in the sand box, the sand is so nice between my fingers, Mommy's hair is better but this is okay. After awhile of being sat in the sand I notice some bushes that look fun... I make my way towards the bushes when I notice there are lots and lots of pretty butterflies
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I
was mesmerized by the gentle flutter of their wings. I'm reaching my hands up to try and touch them, my fingertips grazing their wings as they flutter upwards. They are flying away so I'm chasing after them. I keep running and running and running, I only stop when a car honks at me. It was very scary! I run to the pavement and I had no idea where I was, I couldn't see granny and pop pop... I didn't know where I was, I don't even know where mama's house is...
I can't breathe, my eyes are watering and I'm sinking into the floor. Somebody kneels down to talk too me but I'm not really listening and when they touch me I start to scream bloody murder which just brings more attention to me... Someone said something about calling the police and that's when I ran off. People were calling after me but they didn't know me and what if they took me away from Emily. I don't know how long I was running for or what the time was or where I was... It was starting to get dark, I'm cold and my cheeks are stained with tears.
I look up and I had finally made it back to the park, Granny and pop pop were long gone so I just climbed into a tunnel and sat there quietly sobbing to myself.
I must have fallen asleep because I could feel someone picking me up off the ground... I am kicking and screaming but my fights are useless because they have me in a tight hold, something warm is placed round me... I start to calm down a little bit and look up, mama, it was mama. She had come for me. I wrap my arms tightly round her neck, she is rubbing my back and whispering in my ear.
"It's okay little dove, I'm right here, mommy has you your okay" Mommy is talking in my ear as she scoots out the tunnel... It's light outside now so I must have been there all night, not that I saw much sunlight as Granny ran towards me.
"Oh my poor darling, I'm so sorry I lost you it's all my fault are you sick or hungry or-" Granny was talking too fast and I was too tired to focus. I just wanted to go home.
"Mother, let's get the poor thing home first" Mommy cuts her off taking me out the park. I had nuzzled myself into her neck, finally feeling safe again... It wasn't long until we got home. Granny went to go and run me a warm bath, pop pop was sent to the kitchen to make me some of his 'world famous soup' as he calls it. Mommy was talking too me but I wasn't really responding which she didn't seem to mind.
She had on the same clothes as yesterday, they had grass stains and she looked tired but she seemed happy... I'm glad she found me, I could have been there forever or taken away if mommy hadn't saved me.
I hate the park now, it's horrible... Mommy takes the dirty clothes off me and puts my dirty diaper in the diaper bin. The bath had big bubbles, ducks and toys!
"Upsie daisy" Mommy says as she lifts me, she is so silly. She is gently washing my body as I play, I'm showing her all of my toys. Me and Mrs duckie, paw patrol as well. Me and mommy turn round as we hear pop pop shouting and the chase leaps in and splashes into the bath.
"Ah fuck, chase no" Mommy says trying to stop him but it was too late. Chase is licking my face as I squeal and pet his wet fur. He smells kinda gross but he is really cute so I don't mind. Mommy makes chase come out the bath which isn't fair but I'm too tired to argue. When chase is gone mommy turns back to me "do you want the duckie or the froggie towel" she is holding up two towels and I don't know what one I want, I prefer the duckie one I think so I point to that one.
I'm lifted up and wrapped in my towel, mommy takes me to her room and lays me on her bed with my head on her pillow and she sits at my feet. Granny walks in and I'm glad I'm covered up in the towel...
"Oh my what a nakey baby we have" Granny says making me giggle, she gives mommy one of my onesies and a diaper along with rash cream and baby powder. After the whole diaper routine she takes a lotion out of her bedside table, putting some on her hands and rubbing it into my body. She starts on my legs, gently humming as she does it. The soft scent of lavender and her gentle hums make me feel sleepy.
I know I'm safe. I don't know why I ever doubted mommy would find me... She picks me up and is making circles on my back with the lotion, her touch is soft on my skin. I had never felt so relaxed, all the years I had cried were worth it. If being a little means I get actual love then I'm glad I'm here... I'm happy I'm with Emily, I wish my actual mother was even close to her... I don't even think the woman who birthed me is my real mother anymore. Emily is the only mommy I will ever recognize.
"Mommy" I whisper and she stops humming.
"What is it baby?" Mommy whispers back, I rub my eye with my fist and yawn.
"I love you" I whisper back, kissing her cheek.
"I love you too, get some sleep little dove" mommy starts humming again. I fall asleep with my head on her shoulder, with her gentle humming in my ear.
