Sunshine, Starlight | Aryan Simhadri

Part 124

"That is the most stupid thing I've ever heard"

"It's not it's really smart"

"It's not"

"It is you're just stupid"

"You're stupid"

"Nu uh" I watched the loud conversation between xochitl and Momona with a slight smile taking a bite from my food

"You know, I'm actually not entirely sure what they're arguing about" Sophie said leaning a little closer to me

"I never am" I said back shaking my head a little

"It's funny to watch though" Aryan laughed from my other side watching the two girls argue about whatever it was they're arguing about

I looked over to malia who was sitting between xo and mo, looking really overwhelmed from one of them to the other and I laughed again

I saw my phone light up and looked to see who was calling, it was Darcy's mother. I didn't want to get up and accept the call cause I knew it was gonna leave me feeling terrible and with our flight leaving for New York in four hours I didn't really want to mess my mood up

I looked at the phone ringing for a long while until I excused myself and got up accepting the call

"Hello ?"

"Hey Belle, we're cleaning out Darcy's boxes right now and there are some things that I know she wanted you to have, could you by any chance pick it up ?"

"Uh, it's kind of bad right now"

"Don't worry you can pick it up tomorrow or later too"

"I'm in LA right now and about to fly to New York because of the whole press thing uh, I won't be home for a couple of weeks"

"Oh"

"But I'll just sent someone by to pick it up if that is okay with you ?"

"Of course darling, you enjoy yourself. Have fun sweetie" I heard her voice breaking through the phone as she hung up and felt my heart break right with it.

She was grieving her daughter and I was out here enjoying my life. Living in a way that Darcy couldn't anymore, in a way that her mother knew she couldn't anymore

I took a breath and shook my head to push the thoughts away

Darcy is dead. Maybe if I would've done more for her or been more there for her she would've made it. Maybe if I paid more attention to her I would've noticed her feeling bad sooner. Maybe if I would've been a better friend... I'm a terrible friend and an even worse girlfriend

I was a horrible girlfriend, I only caused trouble. Why would anyone want to be with me ? Why would Aryan want to be with me ? He's this handsome and just perfect guy, while I'm... me

I would for sure not want to date me. What could he possibly see in me ?

He deserves better. So so much better. And I felt like throwing up just by the thought of me leaving again with no foreseeable date to meet again in the near future

I hated long distance and the whole insecurities didn't make it any better, this relationship was gonna end up destroying both of us

But I also really loved him too much to break up with him, I had never felt this way about anyone before. Every touch still felt like fireworks in my skin and every kiss like sparks were flying around us

"Belle ? Are you okay ?" I nodded putting a smile on

"Yeah I'm great" I sat back down at the table and stabbed the fork into my noodles playing around with them while bouncing my leg up and down completely in thoughts

I felt a hand rest on my leg which calmed the bouncing down immediately, I looked at Aryan who was frowning at me, he was worried again. All he did was worry about me

I grabbed the hand he was keeping on my leg just holding onto him in any way possible, I had so many thoughts in my brain it was giving me a headache

Grief was such a weird concept, so was death. I still don't think I 100% realised that Darcy's will never come back, I just think one day she'll stumble through the door with one of her crazy stories so happy and excited

I tried turning my focus back on my friends who were here but Darcy always found a way into my mind and the guilt for me being here was eating me alive

My thoughts were so loud I feared that the people around me could hear them soon, I looked around the table seeing everyone in conversations while my mind was spinning

I let go of Aryans hand but he still kept his hold on mine, he turned his head to look at me while I just gently shook my head taking another breath

At this point my thoughts were all I was hearing along with my breaths, Aryan still didn't let go of my hand but I knew if I stood here just a few seconds longer I would absolutely burst into tears so I got up, Aryan right behind me while not letting go of my hand for a second

I wrapped my fingers around his hand again squeezing it while just walking somewhere, Aryan took the lead, walking in front of me and leading me out of the restaurant

I leaned against a wall taking a few breaths, then rising my eyes to meet Aryans and then I started crying. I hated feeling like this, like I had no control over my own emotions

Aryan wrapped his arms around me, steadying me on my feet while I sobbed into his shoulder

I didn't want to leave, California, LA, but most importantly Aryan. I didn't want to leave Aryan yet. He was only supposed to stay the first day but we then decided for him to stay until I leave since I had been an emotional mess and I wasn't actually talking to anyone about it, but now I hated nothing more than the thought of leaving already, saying goodbye to my boyfriend yet again.

Darcy would know what to do and say. She would find the right solution to everything and without her advice I wasn't sure if what I was going to do was actually the right thing, but it felt like the rightest thing

Authors note:
Its been a long time since I posted and I apologise for it 😪
I've had some wild and crazy past few days in a not so great way and I neither had the time nor the energy to write anything so I decided not to post two shitty chapters but to just skip two days to actually get somewhere
I also decided that I will no further talk about Walkers relationship life on here until I post the Walker fanfic since I don't want to spoil anything about that too early sooo stick around to figure out what's going on with Mel and if there is still Mel (or if I had just been pranking you and making you believe she would be my main character)

Now this part is about my personal life so if you're not interested feel free to skip but since I've been asked here's some story about me going to my ex-situationships prom (that sounds bad)
Alright so the tickets had already been bought and all that so I already had a ticket when we stopped talking, but it wasn't too bad cause I was technically going for my brothers prom and not his (it's the same prom) so this actually sounds way worse than it is, it wasn't that huge of a deal
Well the prom was last night and I had a horrible time 👯‍♀️ I panicked real bad cause I didn't actually have anyone to stand with there and the people from my grade who I was standing with went to their other friends and all that so I was also on my own and panicking and my feet were hurting like shit
What do you do when you start panicking ? Exactly go to the bathroom so I did that and I had to push through a bunch of crowds to get there and of course who did I walk past ? The guy (who I'm still in love with btw.). Well the night went on I was just standing outside breathing for 10 minute and then crying in the bathroom for another 10 minutes and then my brother drove me home.
Well the guy texted me a little later asking if I was alright cause I looked kinda panicked. That's it nothing more happened really
(For context we both agreed on stopping talking since he's going to college soon and there were so many tiny factors that wouldn't actually make us working out possible) so yeah if anyone actually cared enough to read all this I love you 🫶

Well enough about me I hope you enjoyed the chapter 🫶