Sunshine, Starlight | Aryan Simhadri

Part 125

Aryans view:

I watched Belles head rest on the pillow beside me, her fingers were playing with the bracelet around my right wrist while her eyes just started into the distance

I could normally read her every thought and feeling but looking into her eyes now I actually saw nothing, not a hint of her feelings. I knew that she was in a lot of pain, she hadn't expected to lose Darcy

Even though she met her with a life threatening illness she had never really considered that she might actually not make it

I could feel my heart aching for Belle, I didn't even know how I could help her, I just really wished that I could do something to loosen the pain up a bit

"Belle" she didn't react, I carefully raised my left hand and brushed a piece of hair behind her ear watching her eyes zone back into me "do you need anything ?" She shook her head gently, I hated seeing her like this "are you sure" she nodded

"I just need you here with me"

"I can do that" she moved her head closer to me resting it against my chest and closing her eyes, I wish I could hear what she's thinking "I love you"

"I love you"

The other girls had left for New York yesterday, Belle had decided to stay a little longer here in LA, everyone understood why and I really appreciated that none of the girls or the PR team were pushing her about this, grieving was a tough thing and even though I hated seeing her go through it but I was glad that I could, even if it was just for a tiny part of it, be with her and be here for her through this

I placed a kiss on her forehead and started playing with her hair gently

We laid there in silence for hours, enjoying each others quiet comfort while not saying anything, I loved this about her, about us. I didn't need to put an effort in with her, even the laying here while not sharing a word was the most special thing

Eventually she backed her head away a little and raised her eyes to meet mine and while her eyes were filled with so much pain she still was so beautiful

She tilted her head upwards a little and connected our lips, our lips danced in an unsynchronised rhythm until I pulled away

"Are you okay ?" She nodded trying to go for another kiss but I spoke again "are you sure ?" She nodded once again "talk to me"

"I don't want to talk about it. I don't want to hear about it, think about it or feel it I am so sick of feeling like this all the time" I caught a tear that fell from the side of her eye "and I really don't want you to look at me like that, I can't stand that pity in everyone's eyes anymore. It makes me want to lock myself into a room and never look into anyone's eyes again. Yes, my best friend died. Yes, I am grieving her and yes, I know that I am a horrible friends for all of this I don't need to be reminded of that every damn day. And you are the one person that I actually want to be around but..." I watched her rambling everything down with a shaky voice and a few tears falling from her eyes, she had sat up on the bed at this point and looked around the room sniffling a little while scrunching her nose

"But ?" She closed her eyes and sighed "Belle ?"

I didn't know what to expect from the but. What did it mean ? Why didn't she keep talking ? Did I do something wrong ? I don't think I could ever forgive myself if I was a reason for her to feel like that

She couldn't have done anything to prevent it, but still the guilt was eating her alive. I hated seeing her like this, I would do whatever it took if there was a possibility of releasing her from her pain

She opened her eyes and looked out of the window, the sun making her beautiful green eyes shimmer brighter. I wasn't sure how someone could have so beautiful features, like everything was designed carefully to make her look as perfect as she turned out

Claribel was the most beautiful, the kindest, the sweetest, the most polite and just the most amazing person to exist, she made loving her so easy. Loving Claribel Scobell was like breathing, like I was made to love her, like that is my entire life purpose, like I couldn't actually live without loving her.

"Belle. It's okay" I nodded reassuringly brushing a piece of hair away to reveal her face, I wiped another tear away from her cheek "And you are the one person that I actually want to be around but... ? But what ?"

"But I'm not sure if I can keep doing this...."

Authors note:
WOAH WHATS HAPPENING WHATS GOING ON
WHAYS GIRL TALKING ABOUT STOP IT.
I just got home from my graduation party thingy (it's not actually my graduation yet it's complicated I still have a few years) well it's almost 1 am and I have to be at school at 7:45 am 💪 but I didn't want to go 2 days without posting so here is a rather short but interesting chapter with a whole lot of Aryan simping 🤭🤭
Please someone get me an Aryan pleaseee 😪