Absence Makes The Heart Go Fucking Insane

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I carefully pull back the covers and slip on my bra and underwear, I quietly dress and head to the bathroom brushing my teeth before coming back to make my side of the bed up. Katie was still out for the count, she didn't need to be up yet. I needed to leave soon but the sight of a peaceful, dreamy Katie has me wanting to hide away from the world and lay with her. I stand over her for a moment just taking in all of her beauty, I really don't want to go.

I grabbed a sticky note and gently wrote on it, leaving it on the pillow. I wanted to remind Katie I see her totally different than what she thinks I do. This girl has quickly stolen a piece of me and proudly calls it hers.

One last glance at Katie and I leave, making my way back to mine and Kyra's shared house, ready for the car to collect me for camp

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One last glance at Katie and I leave, making my way back to mine and Kyra's shared house, ready for the car to collect me for camp. I walked into the house and flipped the switch on the kettle, I need coffee. "You're back then..." came a voice from behind me. "Kyra!" I jump. "You made me jump, why are you awake?" I gasp, Kyra stared at me. "You didn't come home... well, last night anyway." She sighs. "Sorry? I don't realise I had to tell you my whereabouts...?" I shrug, Kyra frowns. "Hey I know I messed up... but I thought we were ok?" She steps closer. "You did...and we're civil...the only thing we share is this house. And at this point none of us spend a lot of time here." I sate and pour the boiled water into my mug. "Want one?" I offer, Kyra shakes her head. I grab the milk and stir my drink before taking a sip. "Did you move on? Like already?" Kyra cradles her own arms rubbing them in self comfort. I look at Kyra quietly, she avoids eye contact and looks down. "It's literally been a week Lili..." Kyra sighs. "Oh, right because how long were you seeing Lessi while sleeping in the same bed with me?" I scoff. "Babe..." Kyra starts. "No, Kyra. You chose the path you wanted to take. I'm not even mad anymore... you do you." I smile lightly. "I need to pack anyway." I take my coffee and go upstairs to pack for England camp.

I head up only to be followed by Kyra. "Where did you stay?" She asked, I look up at her mid packing and lick my lower lip in thought. Should I tell her? "With a friend. It got late, so I stayed with her." I shrug. "Her?" Kyra squints her eyes at me. "Do we really need to do this? Yes it was a her, yes I stayed out all night and no, it's not really any of your business. I told you Kyra... If you're serious about Lessi, then treat her right. What I get up to is really none of your business anymore." I zip up my bag. "I know... I'm sorry. I just care, I stayed up waiting for you...you never came back." Kyra looked down. "Well I'm sorry. I'll tell you if I'm staying out, next time." I sigh. "Thanks." Kyra nods.

A few hours later I arrive at St George's Park, where I meet the rest of the England team. We were waiting for the final few girls to arrive so we could head to the airport together. Our training camp this time was in the Netherlands.  Beth of course was excited, for it meant she'd see Viv and for the whole entire flight... all anyone could hear was Beth's constant chatter about Viv. It was very sweet, for about 20 minutes but we are now a couple of hours in and I would now gladly, like to knock Beth out for a few hours. "Beth?" I clear my throat, Beth turns to me. Her eyes sparkling with joy. "Yes Lili pops?" Beth smiles. "Shut up, Mate." I chuckle, Beth blushes. "Mean to me, you are." She sulks and slumps back in her seat. "Prepare for landing." Came over the speaker. "She might make you see stars tonight if you're lucky." I wink, Beth laughs loudly. If there's one thing about Beth... it's that she can never stay grumpy or mad for long.

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