Catch Me When I Fall

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"I mean... I don't know. We all have flaws and we all makes mistakes. You just seem to be a good guy in an unfortunate situation." I try to comfort Tyrone.

"I'm violent, Khai. There's no getting around that, no matter how much you sugarcoat it."

"Do you like being violent?"

"No, but I just am. Sometimes I need to be to survive."

"See? That right there. You're not a bad person."

"I don't really believe you, but I don't think I can convince you otherwise."

Tyrone and I walk in silence for a little longer before I switch to the other topic again.

"So, when you got arrested... was it violence related?"

Tyrone nods, but he refuses to make eye contact.

"But you didn't like... go to a juvenile detention facility?"

"No. I don't know why. It was pretty serious. But they gave me community service and I had to book a doctors appointment to figure out what was up. I guess they knew it was related to a mood disorder, so that might've been why. That's why I have to take meds now. Hopefully I'll stabilize soon. Another run-in with the police is definitely going to land me in a detention facility. No second chances next time around."

I don't say anything, because I don't know what to say. I feel unsettled by this fact. I'd hate for that to happen to Tyrone.

"Are you scared now?" Tyrone asks.

"No. I just really hope none of that happens. Besides, you're never violent towards me."

"Yeah, well, sometimes I just wanna strangle you."

I glance at him curiously, and fail to properly think through my words before I speak them.

"Like... in a sexy way or-" I cut myself off when I realize what I've just said. My face turns red and I quickly turn it away from Tyrone so he can't look at me. 

Cause y'know, if he doesn't see me, it'll be like he didn't hear me.

My logic is messed up.

Suddenly, Tyrone's hand is on my throat and I'm being pinned against the wall. Our faces are inches apart, and it feels like Tyrone is staring through my soul. The intensity of it makes it really difficult for me to tell whether or not he's being serious.

"I-I didn't mean-" I try, but my voice gets stuck in my throat and I don't get any further than that. Probably because I'm being choked.

Half worried and half flustered, I freeze up, trying to figure out what's going on.

But then, Tyrone's serious face fades, and he smirks, then releases me, acting like nothing ever happened.

"You really are something else, Khai. C'mon, let's just go home."

I follow him, but I don't dare talk to him anymore, still somewhat confused and trying to process whatever just happened.

"See, I'm mean, Khai. Would a nice person mess with your feelings like that?"

My voice is back in an instant.

"Why are you trying so hard to make me think you're not a good person?"

Tyrone turns around to face me, and I stop in front of him.

"Because no one else has ever thought of me as a good person before and-" Tyrone looks away, trying to find words. "It's strange. Unfamiliar. I can't figure you out or understand why you hold me in such a high esteem. And the hardest part is... I don't know. I just don't want to disappoint you, Khai. What If I can't meet your expectations?"