Hurricane with a little sunshine by LakshmiVaishnavi
Reviewer : RavingBlack
PLOT
Is there a clear goal/direction?
Having read the whole book, I would say no. Conventional plot structures typically follow a main character(s) that wants to obtain/protect/do something, and this journey is called the plot. The plot should also have a central conflict with two clearly defined forces: the protagonist's desire vs. the antagonistic force(s). Sometimes this means an external threat such as an individual, a society, or nature, but many stories also feature internal threats alongside or replacing the external threat. For example, Pride and Prejudice has many external threats impeding the protagonist, Elizabeth, from her desire to find a husband that she could build a happy life with. Some external threats include her mother who urges her to lower her standards and Mr. Darcy's relatives who attempt to prevent her marriage with him. However, the protagonist also faces internal threats, too, in which her own stubbornness and pride sabotage her from realizing that Mr. Darcy is a better match for her than she realizes. The entire novel is driven by Elizabeth's desire to secure a good husband, but the external and internal threats are what force her to grow as a person to be able to reach that goal. If Elizabeth never had to confront her own stubbornness and effortlessly procured her dream match, then she would never grow as a character and earn her happy ending. I go through such detail in this example because I believe that Hurricane with a little sunshine needs more clearly defined forces.
With HLS (Hurricane with a little sunshine abbreviated), it is unclear whether Vanessa is truly working toward a goal or has real ambitions that she acts upon. It is true that she wants certain things such as finding out why she got kidnapped or taking the internship with TLC, but what do these things represent for her? What is the core thing that she wants? Does she want answers for why she had to suffer through grief/abuse/kidnapping? Does she want to have a better life that she has control of? There should be a single core desire that drives the plot forward, but they could translate into other goals. If she wants to have control over her life, then that could translate to her wanting to find out the reason behind her kidnapping, her taking the internship, and her pursuing a fulfilling romantic connection between her and Caleb. Even though she wants all these things, Vanessa's desire should boil down to one or two things.
In regards to an antagonistic force, we have many external threats, but they lose power/meaning without a clear desire to clash against. A kidnapping and an abusive homelife have much more meaning if Vanessa wants control over her life because they play a role in hindering that desire. They force her to take control over her life and develop as a character. If Vanessa's desires have nothing to do with those things, then these threats are less meaningful/impactful on her. As for an internal threat, it's also unclear as to what flaw or fear Vanessa struggles against because internal threats seem to play a small role in the overall plot of the book. How does Vanessa develop as a person throughout the narrative, and how does it help her reach her goal? How did Vanessa need to develop as a person for her to reach her happy ending?
Aside from an unclear central conflict, there is also an issue with a disorganized plot structure. The beginning seems to be setting us up for a main character grappling with grief, abuse, and a generally disatisfying life; however, right after what seemed like the inciting incident (being saved by her brother), we cut away to four years later. We see Vanessa living a happy, independent, and satisfying life with people she enjoys being around. The tension and overall momentum of the plot seems to disappear entirely, and everything important to Vanessa's journey is told through flashbacks instead. This was odd to me because the timeskip seemed like it should take place at the end of the story when the protagonist had already conquered the main conflict, and the plot is already winding down. For perspective, an action movie shows the main character dramatically escaping the first battle before cutting to them living a completely ordinary life after having completed half the plot off screen. The time skip is showing very important scenes such as Vanessa dying her hair, dating Caleb, and investigating her brother. These are all scenes which mark her growth from who she was at the beginning of the novel, so it seems unfitting that they are brushed to the side, so we could read about something seemingly unrelated to Vanessa's growth or the plot at large.
