Bound To The Seduction by Jiranipoa
Reviewer : CrownedMadness
SUMMARY:
The story revolves around Sarah Suarez, a resilient young woman, and Henry Salva, a ruthless CEO. As their paths cross, feelings kindle, but they must confront their trust issues and past loves first.
PLOT:
This is a romance centering around the common falling-for-the-CEO trope but with a resilient career woman as the counterpart. This dynamic provides an opportunity for deep character development and exploration of themes such as career challenges and ambition, which I hope gets delved into in later chapters.Though the plot idea is a déjà vu, there is potential for the book to be engaging if you focus on exploring the characters' trust issues and past loves in a fresh manner. Moreover, it's all about how the characters and their interactions develop throughout the story.
Personally, I'm not keen on the love-at-first-sight concept. For instance, Sarah's immediate feeling that a stranger has "changed her view of life" after a brief encounter (with no real interaction) or how Henry feels the need to protect her for life is exaggerated and unrealistic. However, love at first sight can be portrayed more believably by emphasizing the mutual attraction between the characters rather than depicting it as life-changing.
The blurb has room for improvement. The information provided about Henry outweighs that about Sarah—including more specific details about Sarah (for example, mentioning her profession) would be insightful and create a more balanced blurb. The excerpt is a nice addition to captivate readers and showcases your writing style. However, it is essential to ensure its refinement (for example, the dialogue needs to start with a capital letter) as it's meant to lure the potential reader.
CHARACTERS:
The first two chapters show Sarah's youthfulness through her reactions. The bond between her and her brother Glen will shape an important aspect of her character. Sarah's response to the betrayal revealed a different facet of her personality, and her icy anger offered a fresh perspective on her. Comparing Sarah in Chapter 1 to Chapter 5, she has the potential for depth and development over the course of the book.
Brandon comes across as a narcissist who seems to be unapologetic for his actions. Given the omniscient head-hopping, I think he will be a recurring character in Sarah's story, potentially causing some complications in her life. Just a suggestion: by providing a glimpse of their relationship beforehand, his betrayal will be more impactful on his character as well as Sarah's.
From the glimpse of Henry, I'm trying to make sense of his sudden urge to protect Sarah, a stranger, especially given that he is suggested to be a cold personality in the blurb. However, the poolside scene shows a different, kinder side to him, implying a potential for his character to be well-rounded.
The brief interaction between Henry and Sarah successfully lit the spark between them. However, to make the scene more believable and realistic, it might be more effective to show Sarah struggling to help herself or in pain, anything that prompts Henry to take action. This would help to create a more genuine and relatable scenario.
WORLD-BUILDING:
The story's setting is ambiguous. From the character names in the blurb, I'd assumed it might be Latin America, but with references to "Zaida City" and "New Stanton," I'm unsure of the location. While it's not necessary to specify, providing some indication of the story's global context can help readers better imagine the world. Furthermore, it would be beneficial to provide more insight into Sarah's profession and the company she works for, as she is portrayed as a career-driven woman. This could enhance the boardroom scene and give more depth to her character as well.
WRITING:
The narrative, written from an omniscient point-of-view, carries a subtle authorial voice and tone of casual, conversational style. From the get-go, the mood established implies that this could be a rom-com. The descriptions are adequate but use general language. Adding extra details and being specific would help flesh out the scenes and enhance the reading immersion.
The omniscient point-of-view can be tricky to pull off without it feeling like head-hopping. Moreover, telling is a natural part of omniscience, so the narrator stands between the characters and the reader. Nonetheless, I find it to be an intriguing approach for a romance novel as it gives an opportunity to explore two perspectives—those of the hero and the heroine—of the same situation. However, I suggest using a consistent "own voice" for the narrative to avoid confusion and be aware of shifting perspectives within a scene—that is, evaluate if the change in perspective is essential for the story.
GRAMMAR:
Overall, the writing is eighty percent grammatically sound. Kudos! However, there are tense inconsistencies, incorrect prepositions, and missing and misused commas and semicolons—some causing a couple of run-on sentences. Additionally, there are some passive voices that can be easily rephrased for an active voice.
TITLE:
The title "Bound To The Seduction" gives off the feeling of romance or, to be more precise, erotic fiction. The words "bound" and "seduction" imply elements of passion, desire, irresistibility, and slightly risqué. Unless sexual themes are the focus, the tone might not align with Sarah and Henry's story, primarily because the first chapters felt more like a romantic comedy-drama.
ENJOYMENT QUOTIENT:
All of the above criteria contribute to the overall experience of the book, including enjoyment. So, there is room for improvement. However, the book is presented in a straightforward manner, which makes it easily digestible. The narrative occasionally brings to my mind elements of Chinese and Indian drama series—therefore, enjoyable for those who find comfort in them.
BOTTOMLINE:
There is a blend of romance, humor, heartbreak, and the possibility of themes like career struggles and women as family financial support—a good potpourri for enjoyment and thinking. Just make sure to delve into the characters and be specific. "Bound To The Seduction" will appeal to readers of women's fiction and lovers of the CEO/Billionaire trope. Keep writing!
