The Summer Of 1993

Turning 52

   The office had their birthday party for me.  As usual, it was a very pretty feminine cake, cards,and singing.   Kari got hot chicken salad for the office.  Kari treated her people well.   The ladies in the office were so nice and we had a good day.    They asked me about my trip and what Johnny Depp was like.  "Is he dirty?" Kari asked.  I told him, "He smells, really good.   He probably has an unlimited amount of Sauvage."   She said, "From pictures he just looks so dirty and crusty.   I wonder how you can put that in you or your mouth."   Kari was uppercrust, married to a doctor, and a beautiful home, cute kids....   She was forty and awkward that she's as my boss.   Maddie came to the luncheon and she said, "Good God, she looks like a female version of Johnny."  She was hugely pregnant.  Only two months to go. 

     I drove home.   Traffic was the usual.  Bad.  I got home.   Steve was home complaining.  "I hate you pick that place.  Applebee's isn't bad.  Come on!   It  is pert  my birthday, too.  I mean you are my wife."  I was never his wife, but his property.   I was told it "was my job" to satisfy him.  "And don't give me that look.  I bet you fucked Depp.   I can get it, too. I can find someone to fuck me." I did not answer him.   I put on a sundress and necklace.   I was still very sore from the weekend.   I was still very red between my legs.  I put on some perfume and we drove to the restaurant.   He had to stop off at the gas station.    "I need some water," he said.    We were late, as usual.   Maddie going to have cake ans ice cream for us.  I loved her house.  It was a home.  Our house was never a home.  It was not up to his mother's perfection. They never helped. They never gave us a house. When my aunt Alma died, uncle Vince gave us the home we live in. We were lucky.

"You'd be late to your own funeral," my mom insulted me. I wanted to say, "it was my stupid fuck of a husband." He was sitting next to me. We looked at the menu. I ordered the prime rib and stuffed my face with bread. "Stop, babe,". Serve said. My belly shifted a little. They talk about about our weekend. I did buy some makeup, a few specialty bras, and clothes. I did buy another girdle. The other one was not working well. My gut was still noticeable. I had cancer. After dinner we drove Maddie, Sam, and Bobby back to their house. I loved the peaceful, quiet neighborhood. I liked my neighborhood. I liked my neighbors. They weee kind. My belly shifted again. The cake and ice cream was delicious. We had moose tracks, chocolate fudge, and a decadent chocolate cake. Maddie got me a necklace and we wrapped up the bracelet that Johnny gave me. It ran a beautiful silver bracelet with a heart pendant and it was expensive. She a,so for me a favorite perfume of mine.  She made my birthday.

We had a nice time. My mom lectured me about my "tooommmor" and I told her I was going to find out in November. Maybe this was going to be my last birthday.

We got home. Steve went to the neighbors and I went to bed. I was glad he didn't want to do it. I had done it enough. Johnny slapped my ass a few times. It was raw and red. We sure had a time and I wished it would have lasted forever, but as I got into bed, I got a glimpse of an old me and Johnny in a bed reading, I shook my head, It was a figment of my imagination....