Lost In Her Eyes | Book 3 |

38

Felix's POV

I woke up as I heard my alarm clock rang beside the bed- I turned it off quickly before I even throw it outside. I mean it's too early. Who sets their alarm this early-

Fuck.

I forgot.

I slept in the guest room with Chaerin.

I looked beside me and found Chaerin burying her head in my chest while she is wrapped with the blanket. She looks like an omelet, perfectly rolled. Chaerin is sleeping peacefully, and I'm scared to even wake her up.

Last night, we talked a lot about our feelings for each other. I am in an arranged marriage but that doesn't mean I am not allowed to say no. I will do my very best to convince my parents not to make me marry a girl I don't have feelings with- or if not... I will have to force them. I don't even care how powerful my parents are.

I will marry Chaerin. That's what matters now.

"Chaerin." I called

"Hmm..." she responded and buried herself even more

"Hey. You're not gonna breathe properly there." I said and moved her head, and put my arm under, "Did you set your alarm?"

She nodded.

"Let's wake up then."

"Hmm..." she responded as she shook her head

"Okay. You don't want to. What time are we gonna wake up? Do you wanna sleep more?"

She nodded as an answer.

"Okay. Sleep more. I love you."

I hugged her and let her sleep.

I have been waiting for this moment ever since I started to realize I do have feelings for her. I mean I was too shy and in denial back then, I can't even call her and talk. I would stutter or I would froze in front of Chaerin.

Time flies so fast. I feel like it was just yesterday when I am not confident enough to pursue her, knowing that men would fall for her.

I guess I am lucky then. She fell for me too-

She suddenly sat down and looked at me. Her eyes rolled as if I did something wrong.

"Wait... What? What did I do?"

"You're thinking way too loud." she said

"Uh... I wasn-"

"You are." she sighed

"I'm sorry. Okay. I apologize for thinking too loud."

The moment she heard me apologize, she lay down beside me and wrapped herself again with the blanket, and buried her face again in my chest.

"Hey. Should we cook breakfast together?"

She didn't talk.

"You're still sleepy?"

No answer again.

"Should I cook for you?"

"Felix." she called

"Okay, sorry. Let's sleep."

She's too cute. I know this is not going to be easy to be in a relationship and I realized it earlier when she told me I was thinking way too loud. How is that even possible? I didn't know what to say nor to answer, I apologized and admitted the mistake I clearly didn't do.

At least I'm with Chaerin. I can admit a lot of mistakes I didn't do, or even apologize a lot of times for something I shouldn't be blamed for. If it's with her, it's okay with me. 

Damn.

I can give up everything just to be with her, even my own pride.

________________

Earlier, we had breakfast together and she volunteered to cook for me. I didn't want her to but she insisted and told me that she wanted me to taste the food. It's kind of salty for me but it's Chaerin. She made an effort for me.

I told her it's delicious but fuck I wanna vomit so bad. She was so proud of herself and happy. How can I ruin the moment?

"Try this." I said and handed her the mango shake I made from the fruits given to us

She took a sip and smiled at me, "It's good."

"Really? No lies?"

Chaerin nodded and kept drinking it.

"I love you."

She started coughing-

"What? Why? What happened? Are you okay? Should I call an ambulance? Are you breathing? Pain?"

"Can you chill?" she asked and coughed a little

"Sorry, I panicked."

"Why would you say that?" she asked

"Say what?"

"That." Chaerin

"That? You mean I love you? Why can't you say it? Are you faking your feelings?"

"What? No! You're overreacting." Chaerin

"Why can't you say it? Are you even interested in me?"

"You think I would cry last night just because you were giving a speech? No! It's because I have feelings for you and I want you to be with me!" she answered

"Okay, you chill. Why can't you say it though? You just confessed to me but you can't even say those words?"

"Fine. I love you." Chaerin

"What did you say?"

"I love you." she said

"I can't hear you properly. I am having a hard time."

She rolled her eyes and read the magazine she is holding. I put my earphones after waiting for her to say it. Chaerin ignored me and didn't talk at all, as if there is no human beside me. I guess she's too shy to say those words.

Is she really gonna say it? No rush- but I really want to hear it from her. I want her to tell me those words. Am I forcing her? I think no. I'm just really desperate to know if she's telling the truth. I just hope she-

"I love you, Felix." Chaerin?!!!

She probably didn't know I didn't put the plug on.