Misprinted Lies (Alice in Chains/Bruno Mars)

The Unforeseen

In the middle of the summer of '95, I took Lily back to Dr. Chase. He called to say that Lily was old enough to take a particular medicine for her Crohn's disease. It had to work. It just had to. He gave me so many pills that it seemed like a joke.

Lily went with Courtney for two weeks later that summer. We all agreed she should have a more equal balance of time between everybody. She should have more time with her mother, especially. My phone rang one night as I was getting ready to shoot up. I sat down in my recliner to answer it, a bit pissed off that my injection would be delayed by a few minutes.

"Hello?"

"Help me!" a little voice whispered harshly.

"Lily? Why are you whispering?"

"I need you."

"You're with Mommy now. I'm going to pick you up in a couple of days, okay?"

"I really need you," her quiet voice cracked.

"Lily is something wrong?"

The phone signal went silent. I didn't try to call her back. I just carried on, injecting the poison into my veins, trying to numb out every other part of my life.

Later that year, we were getting ready to put an album out. Jerry had had Lily very frequently. He didn't trust me with my own life, let alone the life of a little girl, especially when she had all those pills to take. Just as I was about to make lunch, I heard a very loud bang on the door, the kind of knock police use when they seek out suspects.

"Layne are you fucking blind, man? Or just an asshole?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Lily."

"What's wrong with her?"

"You didn't notice. Oh great...you didn't notice. She has bruises all over her. She can't sleep. She's constantly nervous."

"Her Crohn's medicine does that to her, and she probably fell at the park or something. Where is she now?"

"With the guys...at the studio."

We got to the studio. Sean and Mike had been standing at the bathroom door. Maybe it was worse than I thought. I knocked over and over, but it seemed as if no amount of coaxing would get her to open the door.

"Lily," Jerry said knocking, "come on. Unlock the door."

Her crying continued, so I knocked. 

"Lily...Lily...it's...it's...Daddy."

Jerry smiled at me and as I assured her that I would take care of her like a father, a real one. Lily unlocked the door. Jerry stood outside of the bathroom as I approached her. First, I examined her. Jerry was right. She had so many bruises. The situation was much worse than I expected. Not only did she have bruises, but she also had open wounds, everyone. Someone hurt her. Someone really hurt her.

"D-d-daddy?" she stuttered.

"That's me," I smiled.

Taking some towels, I wiped some of the blood off her legs.Lily winced, sucking in her teeth. Her legs trembled; she grabbed onto my shoulders to hold on for balance. I dropped the towels to stabilize her.

"Ow," she cried.

"Who did this?" I whispered. 

Lily shook her head. "N...no...body."

Staring into her broken, almost lifeless, eyes for just a few moments made me want to murder someone. I wanted to kill whoever hurt her. Holding onto one of her hips, I rubbed her skin very gently. I looked at her "pull-up" in suspicion.

"Why are you wearing a pull-up? What happened to the underwear with the princesses that you were wearing before?" I asked, reaching to grab the elastic. 

Whimpering, Lily swatted my hand away. 

"No!" she shrieked. "No!"

"What are you hiding from me?" 

I decided to fight her until I saw what she'd been hiding from me. After seeing the bruises and everything else, I didn't have a choice and neither did she. Eventually, she loosened her grip from my arms, swallowing hard. Lily stared at me as I looked. I felt her eyes on me. 

"Why are you hiding this from me?" I asked, looking at the blood sitting at the bottom of the pull-up. "Why are you keeping secrets?"

Tears dripped down her cheeks, falling from her face. She wouldn't be talking to me anymore, not even a word. I picked her up and held her, swinging her back and forth. The guys continued to wait outside the door. They watched me as I tried to soothe and relax her, as I tried to stop her from hyperventilating. 

"I'm gonna make sure this never happens again, okay? Let's go to the hospital and clean you up, alright?"

With a slight nod, Lily rested her head on my shoulder as the five of us headed to the hospital. I felt sick to my stomach the whole ride.