Dusk (Bellarke fanfiction)

Chapter thirty three

Ola ola i'm sick :(((
Enjoy my loves

Clarke's POV

"You better fucking talk to me, Clarke" Bellamy growled.

"There's nothing to say"

"Nothing to say? How about you start with explaining why the fuck are you crying!!?"

"It's nothing" i said, rolling my eyes.

"It's-it's nothing?" He shouted "Don't bullshit me, Clarke"

"Bellamy stop, just stop" i whispered, drying my teary eyes.

"Stop what? I'm trying to fucking help you!!"

"Well, i don't want your help!"

" Clarke i'm warning you. If you don't start talking i'm gonna show you the side of me that you won't like" he growled again 

Can't he see that he did this to me? Can't he see that he's been hurting me all this time?

"I'm asking you one last fucking time. What-is-it?"

He really want's to know that badly? Very well then..

"You fucking did this to me!!" I shouted, regretting it immediately after those words left my mouth. Bellamy's face crossed an unbelieving expression.

"W-what?" He choked out slowly.

"You did this to me!!" I shouted again, throwing my arms up around me like a mad woman. But at this point i didn't care. He wanted to know, in that case, i'm gonna tell him.

"I didn't do shit! Don't you dare to try to blame this one me!"

"Oh no Bellamy, you know very well what i'm talking about" I didn't felt like crying anymore. I was angry, so fucking angry that it hurt.

"I have no idea-"

"Shut the fuck up when i'm talking to you!!" I shouted again. "I'm tired of this. I'm tired of you interrupting me every time i want to say something. Everytime i want to ask you something you just flip and act like it's nothing!! But not anymore Bellamy, not anymore. I'm fucking done with you"

"Don't you dare-" I didn't let him finish, because i was sure that whatever he wanted to say to me, wasn't important at all.

"Shut it when i'm talking to you!" I growled at him. He looked surprised and scared at once. His hands were inside of his jacket pockets and his body posture gave away that he didn't care about what i was about to say. He stood there nonchalantly, like nothing was wrong.

"You better listen to me because i'm going to say this only once. Then i'm done. I won't talk to you again, i won't look at you again and most importantly, i won't care about you ever again" I was sure that my face was red with anger by now, Bellamy on the other hand, was plain like a wall. He looked like he's gonna pass away any moment.

"Clarke i have no idea what are you-" Can't he be quiet for five fucking minutes?

"No! I don't care about what you have to say. I'm going to tell you what you wanted to know so eagerly and then, as i said, i'm done. So, are you listening?"

He nodded slowly, finally keeping his mouth shut.

"You did this to me Bellamy" I started to speak "You are the one who made me cry like this. Your sweet words, your voice, your body, your everything. The way you talk, it made me so insecure about myself. Although i knew that this wouldn't work, i was fighting with it, but i couldn't fight a battle that was already lost.
I fell for you Bell, just like you wanted. Just like you planned from the beginning.
I didn't trusted you, i still don't, but i thought that i'm stronger than that. But obviously, i'm not" i spoke, not shouting anymore, i think my voice sounded exhausted, like i truly gave up. Bellamy's face turned even more pale then it was before and i continued. "You made me feel things that i never knew were possible. Deep down i knew that it was all just an act but i didn't wanted to belive it. I wanted to think that maybe, some part of you, no matter how small, cared for me.
But i know it was a foolish thing for me to think. I know that now. But it's too late. You've won. You broke my heart and then you 'tossed me away like a used whore'. Bravo. You did it. I just hope that it was wort it. I just hope that you had fun watching me suffer while you were fucking Gigi"

I finished my long speech, leaving Bellamy's mouth hanging open. This is it. This is goodbye. I won't talk to him again, no matter how much it hurts.

"Clarke..i don't know what to say.."

"Don't say anything, i don't expect you to" i said, turning on my hell. Before i made my first step away from him, Bellamy growled from behind me.

"Don't you fucking dare to move"

"What-"

"Shut up! You made me liste to what you had to say, the least thing you can do for me, is to listen too. So please Clarke, give me five minutes, if i don't change your mind after this, you can leave. I won't ever bother you again, but please, listen."

As much as i didn't wanted to, i knew that it would be truly unfair. "Five minutes, that's all you have"

"Thank you" he breath out. "Clarke i don't know where all this came from. You're acting so cold every time we're together. The truth is that i'm so confused all the time. Once i think i know what you're thinking your mind is elsewhere.
It's awful to not to know what you truly feel. You made me feel something that i thought was impossible. As weird as it sounds, you made me feel loved. And Gigi..well.. I can't say anything about that. It was a mistake, i was mad and horny and that's a deadly combo.
Please forgive me Clarke. You repeated those words i once told you, but do you remember what you told me? Be careful Blake, in the end..it might be you who will have a broken heart" He said, repeating my words.
"Clarke, if you'll leave now i can guarantee you that none of us will be the winner. We'll both suffer. Please don't do this to me, please don't do this to us. I can't say i love you, Clarke , if that's what you're expecting, but maybe with time we can figure this out. Please give me a chance Clarke, i promise i'll try my best to make you happy. I'm sure that with time i will feel the same way, you just have to give me a chance, because baby, i'm already half-way there"

He said and after those words left his mouth, my heart stopped. Could he actually love me back someday?

"Clarke, please stop thinking about this" He said, stepping towards me. He put his hand on my cheek and pressed his body on mine. His other hand was wrapped around my waist, pulling me closer to him. His head was in my hair, near my earlobe. "Please let me show you. Let me show you how much i'm sorry, let me show you how much i care. Will you let me babe?"

And probably making the biggest mistake of my life, i slowly whispered a simple "Yes"

$$$$$$$$&&&&&&&&&&&&

:DDDDDDDD OMG emotional chapter as fuck :DD i hope you liked it :) i tried  to make you feel something. Anger, happiness, sadness or any kind of emotion. I hope it worked and well, if it didn't, i'n a shit author :(( :D

So next chapter is it! SEX SEX and SEX :D i will try to post it today or tomorow ;)

If you enjoyed please don't forget to vote and comment :)

Love, Liz