Shattered Hearts (Book 2)

Starting Over Part 9

//YN\\

After Hope forced me to eat dinner I went up to the guest room that they're letting me stay in. A queen size bed, its huge, I have so much room to just myself. I suppose I should actually like it and enjoy it, but its actually quite lonely and empty. I don't like it one bit, I always have Justin laying down next to me. Holding me in his arms and making me feel so safe and warm.

I grab my phone from the dresser next to me and tap the code in to unlock my phone. I go to my messages and open up mine and Chris' messages and see if the kids were doing okay. 

To: Chris

How are the kids doing Chris?

From: Chris

They're doing great. How bout you?

How am I supposed to answer to that? I can't lay and say I'm doing peachy. I feel like I'm slowly dying, slowly forgetting the little details about Justin. The way his mouth would slowly rise into this bright smile that could take any girl's breathe away. How his flirty comment and flirty wink would make me feel things. I don't like forgetting the little things that I fell in love with. But I also don't like remembering them.

To: Chris

I honestly don't know Chris. Uhm. How's Justin??

From: Chris

Honestly. He's doing horrible. You should see him. He's not his best without you.

To: Chris

...

From: Chris

Do you miss him?

To: Chris

Of course I do. He's still my husband Chris. You have no idea how much I miss him.

And I meant it. I did miss him. I missed him with every ounce I had in my body. 

And that's what I hated.

From: Chris

He misses you a lot too. 

I didn't know how to reply to that. I know he misses me. And I guess it would be silly to say that I feel just how much he misses me. I sighed and closed my phone and set it down onto my chest as I stared up at the ceiling. His face flashing through my head each time I shut my eyes. 

And soon enough, my eyes started to get heavier, with Justin flashing through my mind. 

////////////

"Ow fuck.'' I hear someone whisper, that followed with a light bang against something. 

I groaned and moved around in the bed and feel around to look for Justin but then realizing how silly that is that I'm still feeling for him after going almost a week without him by my side. I rested on my side and then felt the bed sink in next to me, a warm hand brushing my hair out of my face. I hummed in happiness and moved against the hand, my eyes slowly opening. 

It was blurry and dark at first, but my eyes soon adjusted to see Justin sitting above me. He looked tired. Weak. His bags under his eyes and his pale face just showed me everything to tell me exactly how he's been doing. 

''Justin?'' I say groggily, a small smile appears on his face. He pulls his hand away and pulls up the covers and slips into the bed next to me. 

Every instinct in my body is telling me to pull away or kick him out of the bed. But my brain and heart just isn't letting me. They keep telling me I miss this, I need this. That I need to feel his touch again and take in his scent, I need to feel his body against mine. I need to feel the safe, warm feeling. And all of that just seems to be a lot more important than my instincts.