So, Basically I'm Me.

Goodbyes...

"Olivia, its time to go." My mom said. I walked out the door and to the car. I tried not to cry. It had been 2 days since I had received the news about Ana.... I still couldn't believe all of that had happened.... Alex drove up and parked. He got in the car next to me and I hugged him. A tear escaped my eye. He wiped it away.

"It'll be alright..." He whispered in my ear. My mom got in the car and we drove off. I couldn't stop crying. If this was me in the car, imagine me there...

We got there and I didn't want to get out. Alex had to coax me out of the car. I still didn't take off my sunglasses. My eyes were red and puffy since the day I found out she had died. When I saw Georgina, I ran to her and hugged her. We both sobbed and just let it out. People were looking at us pitifully and shaking their heads. As if they understood what we were going through... They didn't know the immense pain I was going through at the moment.

"I'm so sorry Georgina! I know how you feel." I cried. I let her go and in that moment, I saw a coffin out of the corner of my eye. I walked towards it slowly. Ana looked so pretty and peaceful. I cried softly. I kneeled beside her coffin.

" I'm going to miss you. I won't be the same person anymore. A piece of my soul has gone with you. I never even got to say sorry for everything that I did wrong to you. I will miss you. I'll meet you there one day." I whispered crying. I stood up and walked out the room, out the door, and to my house. Alex ran up next to me and grabbed my arm.

"Olive! you need to keep living your life. You've said goodbye and that's what matters here." He hugged me and kissed me. I didn't push away but I didn't kiss back either. Alex pulled away and looked me in the eye. "Olivia... I know that you're hurt but I need to tell you this.... as a friend.... Stop holding on to the past. There's so much to live for. Stop being stupid and taking the blame all for yourself.... That's not how it is. So stop. I want a life with you. And if you don't change, that's never going to happen." I looked at him in disgust.

"All you care about is yourself and the life YOU want!"

"Look who's talking! All you care about right now is how you feel, how you're world is coming down, and what you're going to do without her. Have you even cared to ask me how I feel about this?! I love you and I hate to see you suffer! I'm suffering inside too!" He yelled. I stepped back, amazed he had said all that... 

"Then we're both narcissists... Because we both didn't bother to ask how we each felt." I whispered..

"I'm sorry Olive.."

"I'm sorry too. I didn't mean to be so conceited. I just miss her so much. I will never have another best friend like her again.." I said running at him and hugging him. He hugged back.

"You have me. Olive, will you please let me be you're new best friend?" He asked.

"Yes... please don't judge me. Let me be myself. That's what Ana would do and I want to honor that." I said seriously. He nodded.

"Forever and always.." I hugged him and holding hands we walked back to the funeral house. I walked in and found Georgina.

"I'm sorry for the commotion I caused. I just want to say that if you ever need me, I'll be right here. I will never forget Ana. She will always be in my heart." I hugged Georgina and told my mom that it was time to go. We walked out and back into the car. I needed to stop one more place. "Mom, can you drop me off at the park?" I asked. I needed to say one last goodbye....