Anger was still built up inside of me and I turned my head as Allison began to speak. She was already half way up the stairs because we were going to look through the files he had on the case. We would at some point but right then, I needed to have a “talk” with Stiles. “You guys coming?”
“Head up without me babe I want to have a word with Stiles.” I said to her before looking right back at Stiles. You could see the anger practically coming out of my body, I had never been so upset in my life, except for when I found Allison that night. Allison continued to walk up the stairs and I waited until I couldn’t hear her anymore to begin yelling.
“Why didn’t you tell me Stiles? … I’m your brother! You told me that the night I felt like I had no one and I believed you! But I guess that’s only a part time thing.” Maybe Stiles would be my brother when he really needed someone there for him when Lydia wouldn’t look at him or text him back. I couldn’t believe how stupid I was to believe that someone could actually be there for me always and I could call them my brother.
“I’m sorry man! I know I should have told you! But when was I going to tell you? When is the right moment to talk about that? When we’d be on our swing set or when we’d be playing lacrosse? “Yeah by the way man I got molested when I was nine and I’ve never told anyone but hey did you do the homework? It’s not that easy Scott!” Was he freaking kidding me?! Even if he would have told me then it would have been better than never telling me! I had to hear him tell my girlfriend? He could have told me all of those times I told him about my secrets! He knew everything about me but he couldn’t tell me that? Some “friend”.
“How about you could have told me when I told you about how my father would beat me? After I told you how he would wake me up in the middle of the night after having argued with my mom and make her watch as he beat me! I told you everything! I trusted you!” Not even Allison knew what my father had done to me.
“Yeah well you know what at least your mom was able to kick him out and you don’t have to deal with it anymore! This was something I couldn’t just get rid of she took care of me for almost four years every day after school so what you’re gonna compare a couple of bruises to that?” A couple of bruises?! I still have the scars from where he’s hit me so hard that it would bleed for hours. He didn’t just use his hands. Stiles knew that! He’s seen the scars on my face and my whole body. Everything he had said just made me angrier.
“You lived every boys dream to have an older girl want him stop being so dramatic!” I yelled and the immediately realized how terrible that sounded.
“Oh okay let me call down Allison and tell her just how LUCKY she is to have been touched by older men! Isn’t it every teenage girl’s dream to be wanted by older men! Why she won the freaking jackpot!”
Anger ran through my body more than ever before and it took everything that I had not to go over there and beat the living hell out of Stiles. I didn’t care that he was talking about my father or me but talking about Allison, the love of my life, like she meant nothing was just too much. I hoped to god she wasn’t listening, if Stiles had caused Allison to think about that night again and if she started to feel that pain again I would kill him. I didn’t care that he was my best friend, I would kill him. My body was literally shaking from all of the anger and a tear ran down my cheek. Flashed of that night were going through my head and I almost lost it completely.
“Don’t you dare bring Allison up!” I screamed at him. She had nothing to do with this at the moment and I was about to run over there and snap his neck when I heard Allison’s heart beat quickening. That’s when I knew that she was at the top of the stairs listening to us. Although I’m pretty sure the neighbors could hear us.
“Why not? Oh did that get you mad? Well now you know how I felt when my best friend hasn’t once told me how he’s sorry for what happened! I was freaking nine Scott! I barely understood what was going on! When I was older I understood but that didn’t make it any better for me! So what? I should feel happy that I was twelve and an eighteen year old was touching me?”
At this point I just wanted to stop so Allison would calm down because I knew that she was probably freaking out up there, blaming herself. This was not her fault it was mine. “No I’m sorry that’s not what I meant man I-“
“It sure sounded that like it until I brought up your precious girlfriend!” Could he shut the hell up and stop talking about Allison?! That’s when the jealousy came back and I didn’t care if Allison was listening, I was too overpowered by the feeling.
“You seem to be really into her lately. What do you want to be with her now? Is that your plan? Get close to Allison and be the one who understands her and take her away from me?” I was shaking again and another tear fell.
“Yep actually I was planning on taking her to coach’s office and making out. Seems like fun. Maybe I’ll invite Isaac and we can have a little threesome.” He knew that I was only acting that way because of the full moon that day and I had apologized countless times for making out with Lydia and she came onto me anyways. The fact that he brought Isaac into it just set me over the edge. I had seen the way Isaac looked at Allison.
“Back away before I make sure you can’t kiss anyone ever again! Or decide to claw your eyes out so you won’t look under her shirt when you think I’m not looking. Don’t test me!” There was nothing I cared about more in the world than Allison and threating to do something like that was just the wrong move.
“Look bro I’m not thinking about screwing your girlfriend. I wouldn’t do that to you.” There he went playing the “I’m your brother I wouldn’t do that.’ Card. He was full of shit. “I actually like Allison and you can’t blame me for wanting to be her friend. It’s a lot better than if I hated her.” I didn’t believe a word he was saying. I saw how they were looking at each other and hugging and how they are connected now because they went through the same thing. I couldn’t compete with Stiles… He had the whole package and her family didn’t hate him… I decided that we needed to stop and I needed to make sure Allison was okay.
“You swear you’re not in love with her.” I calmed myself and was speaking softer.
He sighed, “No I’m unfortunately still irrevocably in love with Lydia.”
“I’m still mad at you for not telling me.” And many other things I was pretending that I was over.
“Well deal with it we’ll talk about it later but right now we have more important things to do.” He was right about that, Allison was more important than both of us.
“Fine.”
We began to walk back upstairs and I could hear Allison running into Stiles’ room.
“Hey guys!” She put on an obvious fake smile and it just made me feel even worse.
“Here’s the files let’s start digging.” Stiles said and I looked back over at Allison realizing how much I truly needed her.
I pulled up a chair next to her and immediately calmed down slightly. I needed her more than she’d ever know and the fact that her and Stiles were getting closer and closer scared the living hell out of me. I couldn’t live without her in my life, they couldn’t be together. “I love you.” I whispered in her ear before kissing her forehead. I was lucky I whispered because if I would have actually spoken she would have heard the pain in my voice.
They couldn’t end up together…. Could they?
