Øn yøur mind // Tyler Joseph

Love Me

      I raced down my stairs, with red pajamas on, and my hair still a mess. My stocking filled and hanging low, this is what every kid loved coming down to on the day.

But reality settled in, and my mom fell asleep on the couch with her dress from last nights dinner party on, her makeup a mess, and a hungover Dave telling me to shut up with my running.

But it was Christmas? I sighed and grabbed some egg nog, sorta liking the taste but not really, and instead drinking some warm apple cider.

It was present opening time, and I grinned, expecting a lot of gifts were for me, considering I was an only child, and there were several hanging out under the tree.

"Well, it's not much, I couldn't afford anything to big." My mom smiled and wiped her eyes.

"I'm sure I'll like it." I grinned and she handed me an envelope.

Um. Okay? Maybe she's putting five hundred dollars on a credit card in there, maybe she's going to trick me and have something good in my stockings, I thought.

I tore it open, a cheesy note on the card, her saying I was her favorite child... she only had one but okay.

And saw a beautiful fabulous shining... target gift card... twenty dollars?

I wanted to cry. I was selfish and I wanted more, so I bit my lip to stop the tears in my eyes.

"Thank you." I smiled and she patted my back. She was selfish, I was, I got it from her.

Kids everywhere probably didn't have food on their plates for Christmas, and I was complaining about twenty dollars. I sucked it up and smiled.

But I expected more from her. Her heels she went out and bought every month were at least eighty, the money she spent on Dave's watch he tore open was a good hundred, and I got... a target gift card.

I'd feel better even if she got me a music gift card, or something to show that she understood me, but... a target one? Did she even know me?

"Oh don't forget my gift dear." He rubbed my leg and I cringed uncomfortably. Truth is, I didn't think he'd give me a gift.

It was a small little box. In fact, reminded me of a wedding ring box, ha. Did he replace mine with my moms? Just kidding.

I opened it and saw a gold locket. It had an R, engraved in royal font on the back.

What the hell was this magnificent, beautiful, delicate piece of art doing in my hands? And why would some abusive drunk give it to me?

"Thank you... it's beautiful." I actually hugged him, he rubbed my back and patted my hair, kissing the top of my head.

I don't know what was going on here, I liked his gift way more than my moms.

Opening the locket, and seeing a picture of a girl, maybe a teenager. Fourteen or something with curls and a smile and probably her own family who had given this to her. My smile disappeared. I knew this was too good to be true. He was a lie. This was a lie.

"What the fuck is this?!" I demanded, my mom gasping at my sudden change of mood.

"Oh, Ro, ignore that, I forgot to take that out." He stuttered nervously.