Øn yøur mind // Tyler Joseph

Safe

     I sat at home grumpily, Josh and his parents gave me a ride home after he'd told them what happened to me. Josh was too sweet for this planet.

Stupid. I was stupid for not defending myself. Emma and her gang got caught, the team sticking up for me and confessing. They got five days suspension, plus next time it happens, Emma's expelled.

Of course I knew she wouldn't go that far. Her parents wouldn't let their little "angel" get removed from the best cheer and basketball school in the state of Ohio.

And worst of all, Tyler blew up on me from the phone, about me not supporting his game. What a selfish asshole for walking past my limp body and not noticing me. Sometimes I wish we'd never gotten together because of his selfishness.

In case he didn't notice, the bruised cartilage in my nose and my busted lips, made me stay in for the night. My mom probably wouldn't believe my side, she probably thought I fought back.

But no. Apparently taking the beating is the "right" thing to do, according to the school.

I cried salty tears into my paper I was writing, a poem. Probably useless anyways.

"Sweetie?" Dave came rushing in and saw my heaving chest, as cries came pouring out. I noticed how much I cried. A lot.

"Yeah?" I called back, still unsure about him. How could he act normal as if he didn't scar me mentally and ruin me?

"Who did this to you?" He sighed and sat on my bed.

"It's nothing. You won't believe me anyways." I huffed and waited for a blow to come to my already swollen face. Sometimes I tested him just to see how far I could push it before I was sprawled on the floor sobbing.

I needed help.

"Did a bully do this to you? Oh sweetie no, please don't tell me... someone hurt you?" He began.

"SHUT UP." I blew up out of nowhere. My face red from anger. Palms shaking and sweaty. "ALL YOU DO IS HURT ME." I blurted as his hand raised.

He sighed and dropped his wicked hand. The hand that's hit me countless times. I hated that hand.

"Rowan... baby don't talk like that." He looked around my room guilty. Good.

"Don't call me that. You're not my dad and you'll never be. You're nothing to me." I spat back.

He winced. "Should've seen that coming." He chuckled yet looked genuinely hurt. "You alright though?"

"If a bruised lip and practically broken nose counted as alright then yeah." I crossed my arms over my chest.

"Good." He licked his lips and smirked down at me. Oh shit this couldn't be good.

-------------------------

I woke up a complete mess. I knew what he could've done to me. Remembering how his ugly lips on mine was better than all of the nasty and terrible things he could've done. Sick.

He disgusted me, I felt ashamed, embarrassed, he'd left the house like nothing happened. And the abuse continued. But now it was serious, it was different. Worse. I'd take a punch any day than his hands all over me.