I haven't done one of these for this book so: Trigger Warning? Mentions of rape & suicide...
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Once Scott ran by I broke. "I ruined everything! I ruined everything! H-He can't even look at me!" I fell to the floor, wrapping my arms around myself. I did this. This was my fault.
"Mitchy, come here."
I just shook my head.
"Can you excuse us really quickly?" Kevin asked the others softly. They respected his wishes and left to who knows where. "Mitchy. Come sit next to me." I shook my head, "I r-really don't want t-to." Next he was sitting next to me. "How b-badly did I-I screw this up?" "You didn't." "Then why can't he look at me!?"
"He's upset too. He just doesn't know how to act." "Its because I slept with Alex... I did this. It was me." "No. It was Alex. He took advantage of you, Mitch."
"I cooperated. Its not like I was screaming to stop." "But you were drunk and took advantage of that. Therefore, you weren't in your right mind to consent or not..." "Consent!? It-It wasn't rape Kevin. Stop acting like it is!" I stood up, and had every intention to leave but my car wasn't here... I stuck.
And that when it hit me. All those health classes and crime shows talking about consent, assault, rape... Oh god.
It felt like a wave had fallen over me. "Oh god. Kevin!" Kevin stood up and hugged me.
***
A week had passed and everything had been postponed for us. The wedding was off for now, Scott hadn't tried to contact me, Tetratonix was forced to stop until I had completed counseling. I honestly didn't see the point. I just wanted Scott but that wasn't happening any time soon.
"Mitch." "Yes." I answered monotonously. I hated this woman.
"How do you feel?" "Like everything is still my fault."
"Any suicidal thoughts? Depression?" She asked, "Thoughts..." I shrugged.
I had thought about it. Just to put me out of my misery. So all the drama would just go away. But that was only once. Its not like I was going to go through with it.
"Thoughts? So you've thought about killing yourself. Over the situation with Alex?"
I may have hated her, bit she was right. I sighed and nodded. "I mean, it was only once." She nodded and wrote some stuff on her note pad, "Okay. Well tell me about it."
***
***
"Scott. You need to talk to Mitch." Kirstie said. "I can't. I wouldn't even know what to say." "Scott. Stop being stupid. He needs to know you aren't mad at him." "Why would I be mad at him? Alex did this."
There was a pregnant pause, "H-How is he?"
"He is getting better. Accepting the fact that it wasn't his fault. He finally managed to stop hating himself." Kirstie looked like she was holding something back, "What is it you aren't telling me Kirstie?" She shook her head, "Nothing." "You can't lie. Did something happen?"
"Johnathan hired a counselor... He has been meeting with her every afternoon since the whole ordeal started." "Oh my god. And no one told me?" "He could've told you if you talked to him!" Kirstie pressed. "What was I supposed to say?! Huh? I'm sorry my ex-boyfriend raped you!? You act as if I know how to deal with this too!" "Why not say that Scott! Instead making him feel horrible and unloved."
I was horrible. I left him to deal with this alone. This was my fault in the first place. "If I had never broke up with Alex..." "If you didn't, you wouldn't have had the opportunity to tour with us, be one of my best friends, be Mitch's fiancé, or be sitting here today. You'd be reading about this in one of those fics online, not living it."
She had a point. Why was this group so wise? First Kevin, now Kirstie.
"How do I make it up to him? What if he doesn't want to see me anymore!?"
She rested her palm on her forehead, "Scott. I'm leaving. When I come back tomorrow you better have talked to him!" Kirstie threatened then left me sitting in my bed.
*****
Scott: I'm sorry. I truly am
Scott: where are u? Can we talk?
My Everything: ur talking to me now?
Scott: I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking straight. Kirstie told me I was being stupid. And tbh I was.
My Everything: ... I'm @ 2325 sunshine ave.
Scott: I'll be there
*****
"This must Scott?" A short old woman said once I entered the room.
Mitch had given me the address of his therapist.
Mitch turned around, shocked. "I-I didn't... Why didn't you just text me that you were here?" He asked. "I know I wasn't here for you in the beginning, but I want to be here now." "Uh, excuse us Claire." I watched him get up quickly out of his chair, and towards me.
"Mitch-" he cut me off by embracing me in a tight hug. I returned it, slightly squeezing him. "I'm so sorry." I mumbled into his hair. "I missed you." Mitch said into my chest then I tilted his chin up and leaned in and pressing his lips in a rather chaste kiss. Mitch grabbed the front of front of my t-shirt, "You better not leave again." Mitch says after we pull away, "Never. We're supposed to be getting married remember?"
"You still want to?" "Why wouldn't I?" I asked.
"I-I thought? Uhm.. Nevermind." "Mitch. Speak your mind." Claire said.
Nosy much. But she did get Mitch to start talking again.
"I just thought after this, the wedding was off. Y-You wouldn't want to deal with me after Alex."
"I see how badly I messed up," I sighed, "I couldn't stand seeing what he did. It made me angry. Then days passed and I didn't know what to say anymore. I know its no excuse, but its the truth... Kirstie had to knock some sense into me and I realized I should be here with you every step of the way and seeing what we can do about Alex..."
"I love you and nothing will change that." I admit.
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Boop. Boop.
