I ordered coffee for the both of us. Jo had argued that she could pay, but I just told her that I knew, but it was more polite for the guy to pay for the food. Jo just rolled her eyes and let me.
We sat down at a booth away from the other people. We had kept our heads down low, so people wouldn't recognize us. It will be bad if people see us together.
We remained silent for about a minute, silently drinking coffee. Finally, I decided to actually speak to Jo, "So, what are you going to do when Asher gets out of jail?"
Jo shrugged, "I don't know," she rested her forearms on the table and sighed, "That really is the truth, though. I don't know what to do when he gets out. No one wants me to get back together with him, but how can I keep myself away?"
"What about Asher?" I asked. She frowned, "What about him?"
"Well, what do you think he'll do when he gets out of jail? Will he come back to you or move on?" I asked her. Jo looked deep in thought. She ran her fingers through her hair, pushing a few loose strands back, "Well, to tell the truth... I don't know. He's a bit bipolar, if you know what I mean."
"Yeah, I understand..."
I didn't even want to think about all that will happen when Asher gets out of jail. The scary thing is that it isn't going to be long. He only has three months in jail. He's a celebrity, so he gets out earlier, and there isn't much proof of his crimes.
"So, you've been visiting him?" I asked Jo. She nodded, taking a sip of her coffee before continuing, "Yep, I have," she seemed proud of her answer. It was kind of funny. She acted like a good girl finally rebelling in her own way, and she loved the freedom.
"What do you even say to him?"
"I don't talk much," she corrected me, putting emphasis on the 'I', "Asher talks a lot, though. He usually apologizes a lot and I tell him he didn't do anything wrong. He would shrug and agree. I'd ask him how he was and he usually tells me how much he hates in there. The conversation is dull and really formal. Then, Asher asks me what I will do when he gets back. I shrug and he starts lecturing me how I need to get better at talking. I tell him I have to leave and he says, 'I love you!' I say nothing and leave."
It was like she was reciting from her memory. It kind of sounds like this happens each time.
"I really just don't know anymore," she mumbled truthfully. She looked down at her coffee, both hands gripping the hot cup. She finally picked it up and took another sip. I mimicked her movements, taking a sip.
"I guess I just need to wait until it happens; live in the moment," she mumbled, trying to complete her other sentence.
The booth was another word, creating its own aura. I wonder if the noisy people around us can feel it, too. I don't think so, though.
"Have we ever had a normal conversation?" I asked. I tried to make it sound like a joke, but the joke was lifeless and truthful. Jo nodded, "When we used to talk on the phone. It was normal, even if so much tension was between the lines of each sentence."
I frowned. I was about to ask what she meant, but I think I knew the answer... and I didn't want to hear her say it. Let's just leave it at that and move on.
"You don't talk about yourself much," Jo pointed out, raising her eye brown as she drank her coffee and looked at me.
I felt my stomach drop to my feet. I swallowed down a lump in my throat. My mouth was dry; the top of my mouth and tongue kept sticking together, crating that obnoxious sticky noise whenever I opened my mouth.
"No, we do," I lied.
It was too obvious, but I couldn't get myself to come up with some excuse. I just waited to see what Jo would say, "No need to lie," she quietly said, "It's not like I'm going to get mad at you or something. I feel like you've changed, too, but I can't figure it out."
I shrugged, "I don't really know, but I don't think I've changed."
Let' hope I didn't sound too unrealistic. I just wanted to drop this subject. I don't want Jo to know the truth.
"Tell me one thing I don't know about you," Jo demanded. My heart was beating a million times a second, "U-Um, I don't know... why do you even care?" I was able to control my stutter at the end.
"We're friends," Jo used the label and was now staring me directly in the eyes, "We can tell each other anything, right?"
Does she really have to say something like that? It's like she knows I'm hiding something. Maybe she's always known and never said anything. Well, maybe she only knows half. The other half is completely a secret.
"What are you trying to get at, Jo?"
Maybe she'll tell me the angle she's playing from. She seems to like to tell me everything. I couldn't help but remind myself of the time she had a dream about me and then told me. But... then I had a dream about her.
"No need to get so offended," Jo mumbled, taking another drink of coffee. So, I'm the one taking things too serious. I wanted to hide away from her. She seems to always dig deep down into my mind and then burrow away there.
"I'm going to see Asher," Jo told me, pulling herself up to her feet. She grabbed her coffee cup and headed towards the door. I quickly followed after her. She walked out the door and I did the same. Once we were out of the coffee shop, I called after her.
"What?" Jo asked, turning around.
Why does she always act so clueless? She just randomly gets up and then leaves, acting like I'm the weird one. I hate when she does that.
"So, you're just going to leave?" I asked her, confused.
She nodded, "Yeah, pretty much," she answered, walking further down the sidewalk. I wasn't going to let her just leave like that, "Jo, wait" I called, jogging so I could reach her.
"What?" she asked again.
"Can I come?"
My voice sounded strong in the loud city. I was surprised it came off that loud. It was distinct, I'm sure that Jo was affected by it. She turned around, "Wait... You want to come with me?"
I nodded. My head was screaming at me not to, but I nodded anyways. I knew it wasn't a good idea, I knew from the beginning, but I couldn't stop myself. I didn't want to leave right now.
"Well, okay, we can go then," Jo sounded casual again. It was completely normal for the guy who got her old fiancé in jail to come and visit him again, even if he hates him now.
"Where is the jail?" I asked, glancing around the scenery, like I was expecting it to be right beside us.
"I'll drive there and you can follow behind me," she suggested, no, it was more like a command. I nodded in agreement and then we left.
*
Once we arrived at the jail, we were immediately led down to the place where the prisoners could talk on the phone, separated by the glass.
My stomach was doing cartwheels. I felt anxious and I was worried of what Asher would say. No, I don't think I really care about Asher. I'll hate him; I'll always hate him. I don't care what he thinks of me... but I do care what Jo thinks.
"Come on," Jo beckoned for me to follow her to one of the windows.
I nervously bit my lip, but followed her anyways. The noise of my feet hitting the ground echoed down the halls. I felt my stomach rising and falling as I walked. I could see Jo's messy hair bobbing up and down as she walked. Finally, we reached our destination.
"Here we are," Jo mumbled to the both of us. I peered over her shoulder to see a seat and phone. I leaned a little further and saw the person on the other side of the glass. It was Asher.
Jo said nothing. She just sat down in the chair and picked up the phone. I wasn't sure if I should walk over, too. I decided to just stay a couple feet away, so Asher couldn't really see me. I didn't want to have to deal with him now.
I was having trouble remembering why I wanted to come with Jo. What point was I trying to prove? She didn't have to have me come; actually, she probably would've been better off without me here. So, why did I come?
Oh, here's an idea. Maybe I was hoping to see if Asher really has changed. I wanted to know how they acted when they were together. Were they as Jo described? Were they formal and awkward? Or were they yelling at each other and Asher was acting abusive? Or maybe they were happy with one another? Now's the only time to find out.
But, why did Jo let me come? Of all people she would want to invite, why me? I was the worst choice. I was the guy that beat up the person we were visiting. I ruined their relationship, but Jo allowed me to come. I really don't get it at all.
"Hi Asher," I heard Jo's soft voice. I turned and saw her talking to Asher. Her face was emotionless. She was staring at Asher, though.
I watched as she listened to Asher's reply on the other end before speaking again, "Asher, I brought Niall here."
I nearly jumped when I heard my name. I felt someone's hand intertwine their fingers with mine. I looked up to see that Jo had performed that action. Sparks ignited inside of me, but quickly faded away when she pulled me towards Asher. She let go of my hand when I was standing in front of the glass, where Asher could see me.
"Because I wanted him to come," Jo said into the phone, her tone was monotone. She still had the distant gaze on her face as she tried to stare at Asher; it seemed like a challenge for her.
Jo turned to me, "He wants to talk to you."
She held out the phone for me. My heart was beating a million times a second as my fingers wrapped around the phone. I glanced up at Jo, but she didn't say anything, so I put the phone up to my ear, "U-Um, hi?"
"How has Jo been?" He immediately said.
I was completely shocked. I had expected him to scream at me and tell me how much he hated me. I thought he would tell me to never see Jo again or he'd kill me. He would tell me how he would get his revenge when he got out of jail. But... he didn't do any of that.
"Um..." I began, unsure of what to say. I settled on the truth, "Not so well," I truthfully said.
Asher sighed, "I was worried about that. Can you do me a favor?"
I had been avoided Asher's eyes. That was a good plan, because when I looked up, I could see a lot of pain, "U-Um sure, what is it?" i stuttered out. I let my eyes fall back to the counter.
"Watch over her for me, make sure she doesn't do anything to herself."
Wait a minute... does he know? Does he know of her suicide attempt? Is he trying to prevent her from doing it again? How would he have known? Jo told me that she had told no one about her depression... was Asher an exception?
"I will," and that was the truth.
"Niall, we're going to go," Jo said, taking the phone from my hands. I frowned, "Why?"
"Because I don't want to be here anymore," she answered. She set the phone back on its stand, ending the call. I watched as Asher looked at her confused before the officers took him away. He didn't tear his gaze away from Jo as he was pulled away.
"I need to get out of here."
I looked up to see something different in her eyes. It was... emotions. She actually was feeling something. It looked like it hurt. She didn't like being in here and had to get out. No, she needed to get out. I didn't want to be the one hurting her, so I fulfilled her requests, "Okay, let's go."
Ta da! An update! Okay, comment, follow, FB like, tweet, share, and vote (every chapter please!)! Bye lovelies!
~Lydia
