Emily's Escape

Chapter 11

(This is the body type I imagine Emily haves. Not saying the girl in the photo is anorexic. I don't know her. But she probably is)

"Are you ready?" Carter asked on the phone. I zipped my bag and walked out of my room.

"Yes, will you be here soon?"

"Already here, come outside," he hung up the phone. It was time for that stupid meeting. I had been nervous the whole day.

I closed the door and saw Carter's car. He honked and I hurried.

"Hey," he said as I got in the car. I smiled.

"Hi, is it a far ride?" I shook his head.

"Nah, about 15 minutes," I nodded. I looked worried out on the road. Why was I doing this again?

"Are you nervous? You look nervous," Carter asked.

"No, it'll be fine, they'll laugh at us," he nodded and kept his eyes on the road.

"Hello, we have an appointment for Emily Parker," Carter said to the assistant at the doctor's office. She smiled and looked at her computer.

"Yes, Dr. Harrison will be with you shortly," she said and we both nodded and sat down. My hands were getting clammy and I dried them off in my jeans. I was nervous. More than I would admit, even to myself.

Suddenly Carter's hand was on top of mine. He gave it a squeeze.

"You'll be fine," he whispered and brushed his thumb over my knuckles. I noticed his knuckles were covered in small white scars. How could that be?

"What happened with your knuckles?" I whispered. I didn't want to irritate anyone sitting in the waiting area.

He took his hand to him and looked at his watch.

"Uhm nothing I'll tell you later. Where is that doctor?" was he trying to chance the subject?

No, he just doesn't want to hold your hand.

I tried to shake the thoughts out of my mind.

I'm fine. The words kept repeating in my head. I'm fine.

"Ms. Parker, we're ready for you," a voice said and I jumped at my mind. I stood up.

"Yes, um that's me," I said to the doctor. He nodded and motioned for me to get in his office. Carter stood up too.

"I'll be joining the session too," the doctor looked at confused at first but then smiled.

"Very well, sir," he said and closed the door after us.

"Okay, Emily, why are you here today?" Dr. Harrison asked. I raised my brow. Why was I here today? Carter.

"Well, my friend Carter here thinks that I have an eating disorder," the doctor nodded.

"What do you think?" I scoffed.

"I think, that's foolish," Carter moved in his chair.

"Carter, why do you think Emily has an eating disorder?"

"Well, we met in a bathroom right after she had thrown up, for starters. She feels uncomfortable eating in front of others and I overheard a conversation in which she told, that she hadn't eaten in four days," Carter said and looked to me. I shook my head and breathed out air.

"That doesn't mean I have an eating disorder," I said. The doctor's eyes went to me.

"Emily, do you agree with the previous statements?" I looked at the doctor.

"Well, yes, but I don't have an eating disorder," I blurted out. I was acting rude. I shook my head and tried to smile it off.

"Carter, can I talk with Emily alone please?" Carter nodded and got out the exam room.

Dr. Harrison looked at me.

"Emily, all of the mentioned symptoms do overlap quite a bit with the ones of an anorexic," he said and gave me a small smile.

"Is there any other thing that isn't mentioned?" I nodded. Should I tell him? I felt comfortable enough to say those things.

"I have rules, and I have this voice in my head, it tells me that I'm fat and too ugly," I started to cry but I didn't mind. Everything just flew out of me, like I had kept it in for too long.

"A voice?"

"Yes, well, I know it's my own thoughts, but it's like I can't control it, them," I said and he nodded. He scribbled something down on a piece of paper.

"And you said something about rules?"

"Yes, I eat for two weeks and they I won't eat for one week, or so. I also sleep with just a blanket and all of my windows open, and I also sometimes take ice cold shower," the doctor looked at me with a sympathetic smile.

"Emily, all of which you have told me, is tendencies of an anorexic, I am obligated to contact psychiatry. You will be diagnosed and then give a treatment plan," my eyes widened. Was Carter right? Was I anorexic? Couldn't I be?

When the session was over I left feeling dumbfounded. Carter was waiting right outside.

"How did it go?" Carter asked with a gentle voice.

"Uhm he said that he thought I was anorexic. Carter, I don't get it," I could feel myself tearing up. How could it be?

"Emily, I'm sorry," he said and wrapped his arms around me. After a few seconds, I pulled away.

"Do you want me to drive you home? I think you have to talk to your parents," he said while we left the office.

"My parents?" I asked confused. He looked at me strangely.

"Uhm yeah, don't you think they deserve to know?" he asked like it was a normal question. I looked at him with astonishment.

Oh right. I never told Carter.

"Uhm yeah sure," I said and got in his car. He too got in.

"Carol, Susanne can I talk to you guys?" They both looked at me. Carol nodded.

"Yeah sure, what's up?" I sat down in the living room. This was a good time. Nobody was down here.

"Okay, so I have a friend, and he thinks I have an eating disorder. I didn't think that, and we made a bet to go to the doctors. We did today, and the doctor sort of told me, that he also thinks that, and then he referred me to psych and they'll diagnose me and then give me a treatment plan," they looked at me like I was insane. Carol's eyes started to tear up. She put her hand in front of her mouth.

"I knew it," she whispered. Susanne gave her a look and looked at me with soft eyes.

"Honey, we will make sure that you get the help you need. Don't worry you'll get better soon," she said with a gentle voice. That's a first. She was always so polished and strict.

"Uhm okay, thanks," I said and got up. I left the living room and went to my room. What just happened?

I laid down on my bed and thought about today. Crazy things have happened.

Carter had been right. I was anorexic. I couldn't believe it. It felt like another life.

************

So, she was diagnosed huh... Crazy stuff. Thanks to Carter, she can get the help she needs.