"You can't be serious. You're not serious, are you? This is a joke. How could you play such a prank of me, Jer? I understand jokes but please! This is not the fucking time!" I yell at him.
This is so not the time to play dirty mind tricks. We're talking about Ashton Waters here. My bestfriend. And he's alright, absolutely fine, fit and ready to take my breath away.
Jeremy stays where he is, near the door.
He doesn't move, or doesn't even try to calm me down. Instead, he choses to go full on silent mode on me. He has a worried expression plastered to his face, his eyes show confusion- confusion about what to do with me- his hands keep opening and fisting constantly, his gaze is fixated on Ashton. Other that that, he has turned into a statue.
Inhale. Exhale.
Breathe Diana, Breathe.
Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale.
Now, take a deep breath.
Release.
I open my eyes, clench my fists, and sit back on the seat next to Ashton's bed.
He will wake up, he is going to wake up.
"Ashton, Hi. I know you can hear me, and if you're trying to pull some prank on me, you win okay, just-just please wake up, I'll do anything you ask me to, wake up okay, please?"
I start crying.
Why won't he wake up?
He has to wake up.
He will wake up.
"Ashton, its me Anna! I'm alright, you won't believe what happened to me in the past hours. Everything that we had planned out, everything. Remember when we saw those rape incidents in the newspaper and we decided to..to take the perverts down? It happened."
"I..when I was walking back from the party, I chose to take the shortcut to Jers house. I knew it was late but I had hopes of reaching there faster and sooner. I was almost there when 3 men followed me and grabbed me from behind, then-" I chocked on my words.
I thought it would be easier now, easier that I'm okay and that I fought. I stabbed one of them. But it wasn't. You cannot openly discuss your rape case to your bestfriend when he is in coma, when he won't react.
"Whoa whoa, he's responding!" Jeremy half whispers, half yells..
My eyes fling open.
"What, where, he's not moving Jer?" I ask confused.
"No no, I mean, every time he is close to responding that monitor over there, it shows. We have to get him to such an extent that the level of his responsiveness reaches the top and thats when he'll wake up."
"That din't exactly make sense to me, what exactly are you trying to say?"
"Okay, look. We have been here for 3 days now, you were out for long, your head was pretty bad-"
"To the point, Jer."
"Fine. So, we have been trying for 3 days, to get even a little tinge of response from him, but it doesn't happen. All of us tried one by one, two-two together, even the whole group. We managed to get a response in the monitor but it was too small. But, when you started talking to him, be responded more than he has with any of us, and thats amazing. Because the more he keeps responding the faster he will be up."
Did i actually make him respond?
"Oh." Thats all I could find myself to muster up. Ashton is responding to me, me? Why. There were just so many questions. My head started aching.
I was supposed to be used to these headaches by now, but this one was unbearable. The pain. I wasn't supposed to think to much, I was told not to stress, but hey, when you have your bestfriend in coma you won't go around doing jungle dances. Although that'd be really cool.
I was getting dizzy, weak from my knees. Whats wrong?
Everything started spinning around me, my head was buzzing like bees trying to build a freaking bee hive. My head wouldn't stop hurting and my vision seemed to be blurry.
"Diana!" Jeremy screamt, in shock.
Just as I was about to hit the ground, he caught me. I smiled in response.
"Shit." He muttered under his breath. Just after carrying my bridal style all the way till my room. Thankfully, no one saw us.
He laid me down on my bed, then walked around to pour me a glass of water.
I accepted it, and felt a thousand times better as the cool liquid passed down my throat. It had an over all effect, my head seemed to be throbbing yes, but it wasn't unbearable. My vision was normal and my hands stopped shaking.
This was weird.
"What just happened?" I whispered to Jeremy.
"I..I don't know, I think I should call the doctor?" He told me, more like asked me if that was okay. His eyes told me just how shocked he was too.
"No, I'm alright. I think it was because of...what happened there, everything at once.."
My bed dipped slightly as Jeremy came and took a seat there, I scooted a little bit giving him more place to sit. He put his hands on my shoulders and forced me to look, "how?"
I was genuinely confused by his question. What how?
Bitch, how did you get Ashton to respond.
Oh, you again.
What do you mean by you again?
I mean me again, now I can't say 'me' thats just weird.
But you are talking to yourself..
No. You keep butting in.
Are you for real?
No, of course not.
Is this even normal? Talking to yourself.
Of course.
Yes, you would say that.
But thats not the point, genius.
Aww thankyou. And, yes true. Now shoo.
"What how?" I asked, trying to hide the emotions from my voice.
"How Diana, how? Ashton, how did you get him to respond? We have been trying for 3 days now. How are you fine with everything that you just went through? It normally takes girls a lot of therapy classes and tantrums thrown, then the pain and the sick feeling how being around any guy ever. How did you get through all the stages without even actually going through them? How did you deal with it? Loosing your mom? How Diana Summers, how? Sometimes you scare me." He said it bb. Nb all so fast and kept blabbering.
"I..I don't know. One at a time, lets go through it one at a time."
He nodded
"My mom, she, I.. To be honest Jer, I..I pretend like she's gone for a business trip, or else that shes gone to visit grandma, which is so never happening but I find myself wanting to believe those things and thats what keeps me going. I like for you to think that I am fine, and yes, I am fine sure. But I cannot make myself believe that she is gone, that she isn't here. Its easier to pretend, and I know, I know its wrong and it sucks and I might be a little crazy but I'm not ready yet, I'm not sure when will I be? But that day is far away form today."
"So thats what you do? You pretend. I wanna tell you how it is wrong and why its not the right thing to do but I think you're doing just fine. You're not letting yourself break down, you are holding yourself up and that is wonderful. You think you're not strong enough but girl, you are a fucking hulk!" That got me laughing.
"No I'm serious. But you know you have to stop pretending one day right? When you're ready, but you will. You cannot imagine she is at a business meeting forever, thats wrong. Yes, you're crazy, totally and obviously, but crazy is good for you. Promise me one thing?" He asked, very serious.
I gulped.
"What?"
"That you will tell me when you're ready and we will face it together? When you're ready to let her go. Alright?"
I smiled. "Yes, thankyou so much Jer, you don't know how much this means to me."
"Oh, I guess i do," he winked.
"I know you won't push me to answer once you've asked but since you did realise I don't want to lie, not to you at least."
He seemed confused.
What? Is this nut-head always confused?
"What? Is there a nut inside that small head of yours instead of a brain?" I asked.
"Judging by the look you're giving me, I guess so.."
I chuckled, "About the little incident after the party.." I started, "well I have always hated that stuff. Never in my life I dreamed about cowering in front of them, but as they say its easier said then done. When I found myself in the situation, things changed, obviously. But I never felt depressed or I don't know what those girls felt but I din't feel the same. At first I was stunned, then powerless, useless, taken advantage of, just a girl. Then something happened that reminded who I am? And the scene turned. Even though I knew I wouldn't win, I put up a fight. I din't cower away. Yes, I tried to escape but who am I kidding? Trying to fight 3 massive guys alone isn't heroic, its stupid. I did what I could, when I failed in escaping I din't think of myself as one, I just..I just had this feeling of..? I don't know how to say it but what I felt wasn't self pity or bad for me. Every emotion I felt was channelled into anger. I hate them. All I wanted to do at that time was make them suffer. I still do, I want to cut out their manlyhoods and feed it to them. I mean how could you?"
"Woah woah woah, hey there stop.. I am scared of sitting next to you now." He said, his eyes wide open.
"C'mmon, you were there too. You were quiet the hero" I winked.
"aww man, not this again!" He whined.
I smiled.
"Jer, I'm serious. I would have been used and thrown out there in the alley if it weren't for you. And I know we haven't got time to talk about it yet, but we have to. I need to get it all out and so do you. You were there too, I mean I know I should be in shock but you should feel the same, witnessing something like that, it drives people crazy. What about you?"
"No Anns, its alright I'm fine." He replied, without looking at me.
Seriously? Could've lied a little better!
I cupped his face with my hands and forced him to look at me, once I was sure I had his attention I spoke, "spill."
"Fine."
"When Ashton met with an accident, the police called me up first, I was the one that called him last, I called him up to remind him to take you along since I couldn't drop you home. When the police told me there was an accident and they found the boy bleeding and almost dying. I was processing everything really slowly that time and then it struck me, that you were supposed to be in the car with him too, so I asked the police about you and they said that there was no one else. It was just the boy. The gave me the worst case scenario. They said either we would find your body or you could have walked somewhere near for help, but I wasn't ready to buy that. If you were in your senses you would first call the ambulance since Ashton's phone was perfectly fine. Knowing you, I called up Tony. He said he saw you leave alone at about that time only. So I quickly dialled up Andrew and asked him to call up Ashton's mom and go to the hospital. I ran off looking for you. Since my house is the closest to Tony's I figured you'd show up here first. I looked everywhere in the neighbour hood, I looked in every bus stop, corner, car. Then it hit me to check the alleys, so the first two were out of luck but the third one, I was sure I heard men trying their nasty stunts on someone. I din't know it was you till I was actually facing you, until then I was just trying to help a girl. When I saw you, anger took over me to and I hit them with the pole like thing. After that everything went in such a blur. I can hardly remember that night. I was so worried that you would pass. But you being you. Nothing happened." He let out.
I leaned into Jeremy, knowing that we needed each other right now.
He wrapped his arms around my waist and I winced, "oh mu gods. Shit, I'm so sorry I completely forgot!" He started blabbering again.
"Oh shutup, its not that bad!" I replied.
"Bad? Gods. I was there! Your back was bleeding so much that your tshirt was soaked! You also hit your stupid head! Next time you do anything, think 3 times!"
"Alright!"
I gave up leaning into him again. This time he was careful with his hands but his hold still made me feel better. All I needed right now is for someone to be there for me.
"Jer, have you seen the cuts?" I whispered.
"Have you?" He asked back.
"No, but can I?" I asked, my voice was muffled my the tshirt Jeremy wore.
He pulled back.
Taking both of my hands, he placed them in front of him, palms facing up. "Ready?"
I nodded.
He quietly started undoing the dressing on my wrists and stopped near my elbow. My eyes were shut so tightly that I could see the stars dancing.
"You're ready Anna, open them"
I slowly opened my eyes, revealing my cuts. There were 3 on one hand and 5 on another. Deep and red, they were still healing and I felt like they would take long. The wounds were still red and clearly visible.
They were wide and creepy.
"Okay?" Jeremy asked, softly.
"Okay." I nodded.
I took a deep breath.
"These are not the signs of you failing or you being used. These are the signs of your strength, your will power, your thinking, your heart, your anger. You're not weak Diana, this is what you are. You have so much hope and courage that all of this couldn't do even a little damage to your walls. You my girl, are fantastic, a girl everyone should know, respect, remember, honour and most of all FEAR. You hear me? Every time you look at them, you remember your amazing qualities. Remember you put them down that night, remember that you won. These are not scars, this is a mark of your bravery."
I let the words sink in, and he was right. I won that day, I din't loose, I won.
I nodded. "I will remember that, always."
"Good."
We were in peaceful silence for 10 minutes.
Then I remembered his first question, "about Ashton.." We both said at the same time.
He ushered me to continue..
"I think..."
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MUAHAHAHAHAA i think I'm getting better and better at this suspense thing!
love you guys for all those amazing comments, I will try to update faster, but then the story will get boring, i need time to go through the events in my mind. But i'll try alright!
VOTE AND COMMENT!
What dos you think about this chapter? What will the answer be?
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I love you, Bestfriend.
Teen Fiction"I love you, Ashton" I whispered to his sleeping face, being careful so he doesn't hear. Quickly kissing him on the cheek, I run away knowing that he can't know, and he will never know. I'm in love with my bestfriend. "Diana?" Ashton's voice stop...