Finding Forgiveness {Jerza}

Chasing the Moment

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Hope you enjoy the chapter!
-A

Erza's P.O.V.

I was drifting between two parallel realities. 

On one hand, I was tearing at the seams, trying to figure out how to breathe. On the other, I forced myself to remain strong and confident despite what had happened.

However different those two facades may seem to be, they were one in the same to me. The two separate halves that made my whole.

Regardless of this insight, I pulled myself out of bed with a raging headache and deepening heartache. 

How did I get back to the hotel?

I squinted against the sunlight streaming in from the window; which confirmed that it was, indeed, morning.

After I'd checked the Fernandes lake house I was too tired to continue my search. I must've cried out all the strength inside of me before I managed to drag myself... somewhere.

Flickers of memories battered back and fourth inside my already-aching skull. I winced at the pangs of reminiscence. Was this... A hangover?

I typically didn't get these but... Here I am.

I can only remember walking into a pub, or bar, or tavern or something. I ordered a drink, wait, no- Someone ordered me a drink and, well, it's pretty obvious I drank it.

I attempted to run my hand through my tangled hair before giving up with a pout. I sat on the bed thinking over last night the best I could.

There was a man- He had black hair and dark eyes. He was definitely older than I was. He looked like he could be someone's father, maybe. 

He told me his name... What was it?

Did it begin with an A? No- wait.

It began with an E. I'm sure of it. E-something or other.

Elijah? No.

Ethan? No.

Eit-

A sharp knock on the door interrupted my thoughts, 

"Erza?" Lucy's voice called from the hallway, "Are you awake? Everyone's packing their things..."

"Yes, I'm awake!" I shouted back, "I should be ready in a few minutes. I'll meet you all outside."

"See you then!" She replied as I heard her footsteps fade down the hall.

I was left alone just as I was a few moments ago. But this time, for some reason, felt much more confined than before. After hearing someone else's voice appear and disappear reminded me of the silence I'd been in for awhile now.

Ever since Jellal and I split... I haven't talked much with anyone, now that I think about it.

I don't have the energy in me to hold a conversation. As badly as I want to reach out and talk to my friends, I also desperately want to be on my own. I needed to think things through thoroughly and rationally. 

I rose to my feet and stretched for a moment, before making my way out of the bedroom and into the kitchen. I put some water on the stove and prepared tea leafs for when it was hot enough.

My physical movements seemed to be just as frail as my emotional ones.

I took things slow and tried to adjust to the lack of energy I felt, but it only made me think about it more. And then it made me think about why I felt this way. And then it made me think about who made me do the things to make me feel this way.