Begin Again

June 20th

" I specifically ordered you to pile this according to their numbers ! That's the only thing I asked  you and 
yet— " he said while waving the papers in front of me like I don't see it clearly . How can't I? Halos ihagis niya na sa mukha ko ang mga papeles na pinagawa niya sa'kin kahapon.Which I don't purposely made this kind of ... sin. Yeah sin. He is making this small mistake like a big problem that can cause of the disruption of this entire world. Like I disobeyed the holy rule of his kingdom.

Eh di ba mas malala pa iyong una kong pagkakamali? Bakit feeling ko mas malala ngayon ang galit niya?

Pwede ko naman ulitin 'yan nang walang pag aalinlangan e. I can accept and be truly responsible for my mistake . Hindi ko naman kasalanan na magkamali.

And besides ito lang naman yung pangalawang pagkakamali ko. I was just really hungry that time kaya medyo hindi ko natutukan ito ng husto.

And with his big and loud voice , I bet paglabas ko ang daming nakatingin na sa'kin.Not that I really mind .

" ..are you really that estúpida that you couldn't just comprehend a simple task Miss Magdua?!" from staring on the floor hindi ko na napigilan ang tapunan siya ng tingin.Nagpantig ang aking mga tenga after hearing this humiliating and degrading words from him.Tears are about to come out but I choose to look down again and swallow the small lump that blocks my air passage way in short lalamunan. But before I break the one minute staring contest from his intense eyes I saw his eyes soften,but maybe I didn't see it clearly dahil sa mga luhang nagbabadyang lumabas.As if my tears can understand me,hindi ko na napigilan ang pagtulo nito.At dahil carpeted ang floor ni sir,kitang-kita ang bakas ng mga luha ko.I sniffed quietly as hard as I can while he's still preaching me about my damn mistake .

It's okay, I can take it.Since this is the second and,hopefully the very last mistake that I'll commit.You should understand this Fen.. It's your fault so keep it together girl!

Tanging ang pagbagsak na lamang ng kanyang mga kamay sa kaniyang lamesa ang huling ingay na narinig ko or maybe I'm too busy battling with myself kaya hindi ko na nasundan ang kanyang mga sinabi.I close my eyes tightly. Hindi ko na siya narinig magsalita so I decided to express how sorry I am and promised him that this will not be happen again.Pagkatapos no'n ay umalis na 'kong tuluyan para pagaanin ang loob ko.

I silently prayed na sana walang magtangkang magtanong or kumausap sa'kin . And I'm super thankful for the answered prayer dahil wala ni isang lumapit.

As I stared at my computer screen,I can't help but replaying the morbid scene happened awhile ago.I sigh and pushed myself to work.

" Well, what a great day to start.. " I bitterly smiled and started to pile again the scattered paper on my desk na minadali kong pulutin at ipunin sa sahig at maging sa desk niya ito.

-

" Hi.." I was on my defence mode nang may magsalita sa bandang likuran ko.Bumungad sa'kin ang taong may hawak na tray sa harapan ko.Buti na lang hindi umandar ang pagka praning ko kundi sa'kin mabubuhos ang pagkain niya.He.

I wanted to raise my eyebrow to make a statement na naistorbo niya ko sa pagmumuni-muni.But I didn't.

" Do you mind? " sabay nguso niya sa katapat kong bakanteng upuan.Hindi naman sa isolated ako or introvert pero I needed this time to collect my thoughts after the nerve wracking scene na nangyari kanina.Feeling ko na drained yung energy ko sa sobrang pagka black aura ni sir kanina.I mentally shivered on that thought.

"Okay lang .." I answered politely as I could but without looking at him . As I continued eating or should I say murdering the burger stake on my plate,I totally forgot that someone's watching me like I am the most ugliest person he ever saw.Okay maybe I was exaggerating.But c'mon guys humour me .

Marahan kong inangat ang aking ulo para sipatin sana siya.From his ID it looks like he's my coworker too,but I never seen him before sa pantry kapag break time.Or maybe hindi siya mahilig maki halubilo.When I was about to check his face I was quietly surprise na nakatingin rin siya sa'kin with a big genuine smile.

Oh God.Don't tell me.With his smile it's look like I already know what's his about to say.

" So.. I kinda -" he cleared his throat then shyly smiled at me.

And there you have it..

" ..actually ,WE ,kinda heard the little commotion coming from your boss's office .." I gently close my eyes and sighed heavily trying not be look irritated.

" yeah .." tamad 'kong sagot and tried to swallow the stake kahit naman na hindi ito matigas pero feeling ko na over cooked nila ito.

"It's -"

"Look , I'm very touched sa pagiging concerned niyo but you know he kinda has the right to be harsh to me, you know? It was my mistake and I accept that.It's not like I'm gonna take suicide over this small matter,so thank you again." I gave him a small smile after that.I can see in his eyes the amusement that he poorly tried to suppress .Until a smile form from his lips.Napailing pa ito while biting his lips like his doing his best to make the situation less funnier.

" May nakakatawa ba?" nang iinsulto ba 'to si kuya?While his busy on biting his lips—este eating his food nagkaroon ako ng time para sipatin siya.He's actually looks cute.And very playful by the way he smile.I concentrated on his ID bago ko pa maisipan na gahasain siya,sa utak ko.

He's a junior consultant.Dahil may kurbata siya hindi ko masyadong maaninag ang kanyang pangalan.He lifted his head but before he sees me checking on him I immediately look down and pretended like nothing happen.

" I was about to say na it's his birthday today at doon mo pa talaga tinaon sa araw niya ang pagkakamali mo.." I think I just dropped my jaw somewhere after hearing his funny joke.

I was about to be friendly to him dahil sa pakikisimpatya niya sa'kin . And for trying to cheer me up pero ...

He swallowed his last bite and smiled to me.

" You know his not so hard naman to please . Kuya is just a little bit sensitive pagdating sa mga orders niya so just be patient with him. And I think he's already feeling sorry now for his actions towards you. And I must admit,you have a very strong stamina to swallow all his insults that he threw to you. "

Wow. Just wow. A little bit ? Iyon ba iyong 'a little bit' niya ay iyong halos bugahan na niya ako ng apoy at ma deform mula sa nagbabaga niyang mga mata na kulang na lang ng kahoy para bonfire party na? At anong strong stamina? Anong akala niya na nag papractice kami ng boxing sa opisina niya? Iyon? Iyon na ba ang exact definition niya ng 'a little bit' niya?!

I was about to lash out my inner and over hitting powers when I received a small pat on my head like I deserve it from being a good pet. And also from his overwhelming complimentary for me that made me stop.

"Good job! Keep it up," he said while excusing hisself and leaving the table and me at peace .