otornim • jicheol

082 (Special)

I THREW the doors open.

"Where is he?!," tanong ko sa buong grupo.

Gulat silang napatingin sa akin. Their mouths parted bago sila sabay sabay na nag-iwas ng tingin. Tiningnan ko silang lahat ng masama.

"Jun," I called.

But the guy didn't speak nor look at me. Lumipat ang paningin ko sa kasintahan niyang nag-iwas lang din ng tingin. Then, I looked at Park Jimin na tinakpan ng libro ang mukha. I frustratedly groaned.

Galit na galit ako. Pakiramdam ko ay sasabog na ang dibdib ko sa sobrang galit. Yesterday should be the best day dahil pumayag na si Jihoon na makipagdate sa akin, but it turned out to be the worst! I was so mad with what happened!

I cancelled our date and moved it today, dahil atat na atat na akong umuwi kahapon. Nahihirapan na rin akong itago ang inis ko sa harap ni Lee Jihoon at ng lahat. Pero pag-uwi ko ay mas lalo lang akong nainis!

He was gone! His clothes, his books, all of his things were gone! Malinis na malinis ang bahay at wala man lang natira kundi ang mga gamit ko at ang maraming pagkaing nasa lamesa. And what annoyed me was his letter above all those food!

Celebrate. I'm out of your life. I'm serious now. And it's for good. Pwede na kayo ni President Ji ng walang hadlang. Goodbye.
~Chan

Celebrate? Fvck him!

At ngayon ay ang aga-aga ko ding pumasok para lang makita siya. But he's not in this fvcking room! Where the hell is he?!

I walked towards my table. Itinapon ko lahat ng nandun para maglabas ng saloobin. I even threw the table itself. Pinagsisisipa ko ang mga upuan na nakakalat lang.

"Hyung, tama na," pigil ni Minghao sa akin.

Tiningnan ko siya ng masama. "Then, tell me where he is! Titigil lang ako kapag sinagot niyo ang tanong ko!," I shouted at his face.

Napaatras siya. All my guilt built in my heart again at di ko maiwasang mapasigaw sa galit.
Why do I feel so guilty? Kahapon pa ito at di ko maiwasang maiyak sa sobrang nararamdaman ko. This is the second time na nakaramdam ako ng ganito and it was all because of Lee Chan again. How can that kid bring the worst of me at the best of my days should be?

"H-Hyung,..," Minghao whispered. He sadly looked at me habang unti-unting gumalaw ang kamay niya. He pointed something on the floor and spoke, "I saw him writing that with his laptop yesterday. At saka nilagay sa ibabaw ng mesa. I think that's a letter for you."

Mabilis pa sa alas kwatrong pinulot ko ang sulat. Nakalagay pa sa isang sobre at nakaseal kaya pinunit ko iyon para mabuksan. Pakiramdam ko ay manginginig na lang ako bigla kapag nakita ko ang nilalaman ng papel. Which actually happened when I read that first and only sentence.

I quit.

My hands shook kaya nabitawan ko ang papel. Something clawed my heart and I suddenly felt numb.

He what? He just can't do that, right? Why is he quitting? Why?

Napatiim-bagang ako. I closed my fist and clenched my jaw. My rage quickly heatened at ramdam ko na rin ang pagkulo ng dugo ko.

"Hyung—"

"Let him be. Kung gusto niyang umalis, di umalis siya!"

NO. He needs to go back. He should go back.

"Soonyoung, pupunta ako ng libraty, sasama ka?"

I glanced at their way again before looking at Lee Jihoon. I smiled at him. Tumango ako.
"Oo naman. Hindi kita hahayaang mag-isa dun, no," sagot ko.

He smiled back at me. Pero karaniwang ngiti lang iyon. Yung walang halong pagkagusto o paglandi. It was just a friendly sweet smile. Hindi ko iyon gaanong nagustuhan pero tiniis kong huwag magreact.

Inakbayan ko  siya at iginiya patungo sa library. And for the last time, I glanced over their way.

Someone stole my Chan AGAIN. And I'm not liking it.

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