Hallelujah

chapter forty-one

"I love you Alexandria White," Brendon whispered. I stepped back and looked at him with wide eyes.

"You what?" I asked shocked.

"I love you, and I just want to shout it to the world. I want to climb to the top of the biggest building in Vegas and shout it out to everyone below," he said.

"Brendon I-" I looked at him with a blank expression. "Brendon I can't," I shook my head slightly.

"What do you mean? Alex it can be us against the world! With you by my side we could do anything," he said so upbeat.

"Brendon, I really like you," I paused. "I like you a lot, but you hurt me so bad and it's going to take some time for me to get over this."

"What do you mean?" he said grabbing my hands.

"We've only known each other for a couple weeks Brendon. You can't possibly be in love with me; I don't think that's how it works." His facial expression turned into a sad one and I could feel his heart breaking.

"But Alex, you're the best thing I've ever had and I know I messed up big time but I promise I can make this so much better. It'll be us against everything else, I know we could do it," he was trying his best to be optimistic but I could tell his confidence was shaken.

"There can't be an us right now."

"I need you though," he choked on his words.

"I need you too. In fact I need you a lot more than you would guess but right now I need you to be a friend. Nothing more, nothing less," I said. It was killing me to be having this conversation but I knew I had to do what was best for me.

Brendon stood silently in front of me with sad eyes. The rain was coming down harder now but we didn't care because we were already soaked.

"Brendon I'm so sorry," I said sincerely.

"No, I get it. And if all you want is a friend that's all I'll be. As long as you're in my life I'll be whatever you want. All I know is I need you and even if that means just being friends I'm okay with it. I swear."