Complicated//Shawn Mendes// !COMPLETED! ✔️

Chapter 20

Who the fuck is she? Why the fuck is she kissing Shawn? He,of course,doesn't mind it. This morning my hands and lips were where hers are now.I run into restroom and lock the doors,hoping no one is in there. I start breathing heavily and hyperventilating. I try to blink away my tears,but I don't succeed. They roll down my cheeks and I look at mirror. I look awful. Poor little girl,whose little stupid heart just got broken,stares back at me. I hate to see myself like that. I hate seeing myself suffer because of something I could easily predict. I'm so foolish and naive. I actually thought he maybe cares,not even loves but only cares,for me. I look desperate. I swing my hand and slam it in the mirrorleaving it broken just as my hand. Now I'm even acting like him. I close my eyes and try to calm myself down. As I my heart rate is getting lower I feel sharp pain in my hand. I open my eyes and look at it. Pieces of glass sticking out of it,everything covered in blood and mirror shattered in front of me. I pick the glass out and wash the blood. I take my t-shirt off and zip up my hoodie,because I only have bra under. I wrap up shirt around my fist so it stops bleeding and I head out. Such a great morning turned into this. Layla is absent today,she has a flu,so I'm all by myself today.
(...)
"Christensen,stand up",I hear professor talking to me.
Then I notice everybody is actually staring at me. The second I came into classroom my mind turned off and I wasn't present.
"Christensen,what is happening to you? I've called you out for more than five times and you didn't respond. If you don't want to work and listen to things I say,you can leave. I didn't expect that sort of behavior from you. Do you mind to come here and do this exercise?", professor scolds me.
"I apologize,sir. I always keep track with your lectures", I apologize as I walk towards the board.
I take the chalk and do the task with my left hand,hiding my wrapped right hand. I'm ambidextrous so it's not much of a problem.
"What is with you right arm?",professor asks.
"Nothing. I'm ambidextrous,so I write with different hand each time", I give him a little smile,so he can move on and let me be.
But he doesn't.
"I can see it's wrapped up in something. Did you hurt it?",everyone stares at my hands now,instead of at the board.
I leave the chalk as I finish the exercise and I just think "not in front of the whole class,no!".
"No,I did not. I don't even know why it's wrapped. Probably because that's the thing I do when I'm thinking. I have a need to do something repeatedly when I think",I try to excuse myself and go back to my seat.
"Meet me after class,Christensen. Pay more attention next time or I will sent you to headmaster. You have luck because you know how to solve this. You may go to your seat",he says.
"Okay,sir",I say as I slowly go back to my seat.
I look around the class and I immediately regret it. I see Shawn sitting where Layla usually sits and checking his phone out. Probably texting that redhead. I thank god he had a little doze of respect in him and did not sit next to me.
As I sit I take out my phone. I simply can't keep up with lecture now and they are obviously exercising something I know,so what's the point?
/7 new messages from Mendes/
I want to slam my phone down,but I don't do that. I read them.
"Where are you?"
"I need to explain you that thing in hallway"
"Where THE FUCK are you?"
"Meet me before class?"
"You lied to professor. You bite your lip when you're thinking😋"
"What's with your hand?"
"LOOK AT ME AT LEAST FOR FUCK'S SAKE"
I don't answer. Well,what would I? I pack my things up and stare at the watch. 10 minutes left until this first class is over.
"Class! You may leave! Christensen stay!",professor yells as Nick,guy from class,finishes doing exercise on the board.
Everybody leaves except me,professor and Shawn,who is intentionally packing his things extra slowly.
"Christensen,you and I both know that you have probably the highest GPA in school now. As your math professor and also supervisor of GPAs from every other subject I know that your lowest GPA is 95% and that's truly amazing",he says and then he interrupts himself,"...Mendes you may stay as well".
"Mendes you have the lowest GPA in class right now with your highest GPA being 64%. Especially,your math GPA is currently below 50% which means you will fail",he scolds him.
"Arya,would you mind tutoring Shawn? He will fail",he asks.
"Well,actually,I do mind",I say as I feel angry.
"Why?",he asks me and Shawn just stares at us.
"Because your student Mendes and me don't really stand each other and I feel like I would just waste my time with him,if you allow me to be honest",I say as I want to punch Shawn in his fucking face.
I hear him taking a heavy breath behind me.
"I understand your anger,but think of it this way, if you help him,because you are great student as you are I will let you leave from math every time you want",that sounds as a deal to me.
"He was one my best students and I want that back. Do you understand my concern and wishes?",he continues.
"Yes,I do sir. Even without your reward I would do it,because I just don't know how to let somebody down as certain people do",I think of Shawn,of course.
" I will tutor him and he will get his GPA up,but only if he really works with me",I say.
"Oh,he will,won't you Shawn? If you don't,you will repeat this year",he threatens him.
"I will,sir. Goodbye",he says and pulls me out,literally. I grab my things and say goodbye.
"Let go of me,asshole!",I yell as I push myself from him.
"I know what's troubling you!",he yells back.
"Don't act like you know everything,you have no idea!",I scream at him now.
"ENLIGHTEN ME THEN!",he says as I rush out on the parking lot.
"Where are you going?!",he rushes towards me.
"Away from you and this fucking school",I unlock my car.
"Let's talk everything out?!",he grabs my wrist.
"Now you want to talk? Now you KNOW how to talk things out?!",I pull my hand away.
"Arya...don't be like that",he breathes out.
"Like what? LIKE WHAT? How should I act?",I raise my eyebrows.
"Like this. Let me explain",he looks so calm but fed up.
"Let you explain what?",I'm fed up with everything too.
"What happened in the hallway",he searches for my wrapped arm as I put it behind my back.
"You really thing that everything is because of you and that everything is about you", I shake my head and laugh because I'm frustrated.
"Listen. I don't care what happened in the hallway. All I know is that I don't want to be the other girl",now I just close my eyes and exhale.
I calm myself down.
"So do you want me to explain myself or not?",he asks.
"Do you really want to?",I ask searching for a bit of guilt in his eyes,but they are as blank as they were before.
"I need to. I can't afford to lose you",he says whatever that means and gets in my car.
I stand there feeling little snowflakes falling on the tip of my nose and sharp cold irritating my skin.He got me again.Why do I always believe in his sweet words,heavy lies?