A Second Chance

Hand Picked

"Oh my gosh, this place is amazing!"

"I know!"

"Why have you never brought me here?"

"I don't know! Little guy like it?" Jane looks at her little sister's protruding belly.

"Mhm! He wants to see the dessert menu!" Jessica giggles.

"Hah! No problem! Whatever Grayson wants, Grayson shall have!"

"Awe, thanks!"

"No problem."

They bring Jessica a dessert menu, and she orders a huge piece of chocolate cake.

"Ugh! This is amazing! You know what, fuck you for feeding me and making me bloated before taking my picture!" She says with a mouth full of food.

Jane laughs and Jessica continues stuffing her face.

"Grayson likes it too. Boy, you better calm down in there!" Jessica looks down at her bump.

"Haha! Awe, he likes chocolate! He's on a sugar high!" Jane laughs.

Jessica chuckles and lightly runs her fingers on her stomach while she looks down at the table.

"His daddy loved chocolate, too..."

Jane's smile fades and she stays silent.

"It's so different, Jane.

I try so so hard to be happy for the boys and for the sake of the baby, but... It's just not the same.

I love my baby so so much already, and there's nothing that's gonna change that! I just find it extremely difficult being happy. I feel guilty... I feel so guilty!"

"Why?"

"Because I get to live here with our boys, and Sam doesn't."

"Jessica-"

"I know that's silly! But Jesus Christ! Ugh.. I feel that way about everything! I feel guilty for living! He was such a great man, he didn't deserve this! Sometimes, I wish... I wish that it was me instead of him--"

"Jessica! Don't say that! Sam did not deserve this, none of you deserved this! But you Do deserve to be here!"

Jessica wipes her cheek and nods her head.

"His birthday is in a month..."

"I know.."

"Last year Sam and I took that trip to Vegas.. He said, he wanted to make it a yearly thing, and I-" Jessica breaks down in tears.

"I just keep thinking of that! And now this baby! This was supposed to be such a great birthday!

All of our boys in high school and another little one on the way.. I just miss him so much and it's getting harder and harder the closer it comes for this baby to arrive.

He was supposed to be here! How do I do this?"

"Jess, we're here for you."

"I know...

I know I repeat myself a lot, but I just can't help it! I feel like I'm going insane! Jane, I can't do it.. I can't live without him!"

"Jess... Jessie, I know it's hard.

I don't know how you do it.. I don't even know what to say, because I don't know how you feel.. But I love you and I am always always here for you!"

"Thanks." She sniffles.

"Aw sweetie, come here!" Jane sits beside her and holds her in her arms.