Never Let You Go ▶A Levi Ackerman X Reader◀

Chapter Forty-Two

Because it's my birthday here's a surprise upload ❤❤
(Edit: my bday is October 6th, but I appreciate the year round birthday wishes 💕)

Two days later
Your POV

Levi sits in his leather armchair, his body still, except for the slight rise and fall of his chest as he breathes. Despite being injured in the last expedition, he refuses to sleep. And when he does, he sits in his chair. He hasn't slept in our bed in a few nights.
I sigh deeply and sip my tea. I need to wake him soon to change his bandages. He mutters something, his lips slowly moving, mostly air escaping them. I peer over at his slouched form. He stirs, his muttering more clear.
"(Y/n)..."
He never sleep talks. It concerns me. I know this attack has effected him more than he wishes to let on.
He stirs again, his sleep becoming more and more restless.
I get up, crossing the room. I pour some hot water from the kettle on the stove into his favourite mug, dropping a tea bag in. It floats for a few moments before it slowly begins to sink, a trail of deep brown bleeding into the steaming water.
I return to the living room, finding Levi whimpering softly. I kneel before him, reaching up to catch some stray hair between my index and middle fingers, brushing them out of his face.
"Levi..." I say, my voice barely above a whisper. "Levi, honey, wake up."
His eyes open quickly, a single tear escaping and running down his cheek, stopping at his lip. He blinks a few times, assessing the situation. Then he gets up quickly, his hand stopping on his lip, wiping the tear away.
I stand upright and reach out to touch his shoulder.
"Are you okay, love?" My voice is soft, caring.
"I'm fine." He mutters, jerking his shoulder away from my touch. I stand there, looking down at the deep forest green carpet at my feet. I feel hurt by his coldness towards me. But I should've expected that he would act as if he's perfectly fine, as he usually does. I know he's lying and something is going on. But I don't want to press it and possibly cause a fight.
"Okay, hon... I made you tea. And I need to change your bandages." I try to sound happier, but I've always been bad at lying. He takes notice. He pulls me close. "Sorry (Y/n)..."
"It's fine." I whisper. When he lets me go I get the first aid kit and his tea from the kitchen. I sit across from him at the dining room table, where he's already sitting.
I see a deep red begining to seep into the bright white of his bandages. He's bleeding again. I frown as I cut the old bandages off. I use some rubbing alcohol and a cotton swab to clean his deep wound. He winces, trying to hide his pain. But I can see it in his eyes.
I apply some healing cream and wrap his arm in clean bandages. I secure them and clean up, putting the kit away. When I return, he's leaning forward, his face buried in his hands, his elbows on the table. After a few moments, his shoulders begin to tremble, but he doesn't make a noise.
"Levi!" I say, with alarm. He gets up, walking around the table, grabbing me. He holds me tightly in his arms, resting his cheek against the top of my head.
"I had a dream... Titans broke through and attacked. They destroyed everything and killed everyone. Then, I came here to see if you were okay, and I heard you scream..." Tears stream down his cheeks, but he doesn't cry. His eyes grow dark, his teeth clenching. "You're why I do what I do. I can't lose you..."
He never opens up about anything. Even when he talked about the death of his parents, he hardly even showed a flicker of emotion. And here he is, his tears wetting my hair. I stand there, slightly stunned, squeezing him tighter. "Everything will be okay. I'm not going anywhere... I promise."
"I won't let anything happen to you or our children. I won't stop until I know you're all safe."
I take his face between my hands, wiping the glistening tears off of his cheeks. He leans in, kissing me passionately, his hands grasping my body, holding me as close as possible.
"I'll never let you go..." He whispers against my lips. His trembling hands grab onto my clothes. He breaks from my lips after a moment, another trail of tears streaming down his cheeks without any warning.
"Dammit." His voice breaks. I pull him closer, wrapping one arm around this torso, the other around his neck. He buries his face in my shoulder.
"I can't get the picture of them out of my head. Every time I close my eyes I see their broken, bloodied bodies. They were my squad, but I couldn't protect them."
"It wasn't your fault." I tell him.
"You're right. But someday, I will avenge them. Someday all of this will be all over. We won't live in a cruel world, like caged animals. We'll defeat them once and for all. I will create a safe world for our family."

~hey everyone
Just a short little chapter because it's kinda heavy and the last few were long. It was actually this part that inspired me to write this entire series. I wrote it randomly because I was bored, and I liked it so I actually did something with it. It's cool how something small can turn into something so much bigger.
I hope you all enjoyed it!
~Abby xoxo ❤❤❤