It had been about two weeks since I had seen Ray, or talked to him in peson. I knew the only to get over our relationship, or try, was to keep my distance.
Which was hard, because I loved him more than anything.
I had a doctor appointment. I was scared actually. I wouldn't have been if I would had had Ray with me, to be honest. I had done my last appointments with him and not doing this one with him was heart wrenching. I had Kayla with me though, and she was my bestfriend. I had acted like I was fine for two weeks, only for Kay and Danny. They asked me questions like "mommy are you okay?" when I was looking sad or anything of that nature.
They were smart girls.
"Aileen... sweetie you're not alone."
"what would you call it?" I said back and glanced her way. I heard her sigh and then look towards me.
"Ray loves you!" she yelled in a whisper, "you're not gonna be alone. You love him too and you're going to get back together."
"stop lecturing me." I sighed.
"Aileen Faye?" I heard my name being called. I stood up and sighed, grabbing my purse and walking through the door to the back. "how are you today Ms. Aileen?"
"I could be better but no sense in complaining." I said, sounding just like my mother.
"Well, why don't you lay down for me so we can check on this baby for you." she said, and I did. I sat their uncomfortable with him feeling around my stomach, until I looked at the screen, and I saw my baby, my beautiful baby. And in that moment, noting mattered. Only it.
I didn't want to know the sex of the baby, I wanted it to be surprised this time.
I was smiling harder than normal while leaving the doctor's. I was geniuly happy, just happy. For once.
"Can you stop by Ray's house?" I asked Kayla. She looked at me, then smiled immediately, quickly making a right down the street Ray lived on.
Pulling up, I wasn't necessarily in a happy mood but I also wasn't in a bad mood. It was kind of neutral.
"Hey." I said, with a slight wave of my hand. He looked shocked. "Ray.."
"Aileen, what are you doing here?" he asked, stepping outside and closing the door behind him.
"Um, I had a doctor's appointment today. I have pictures... Thought you'd like to see your child." I said, handing him pictures.
He ran his hand over his face and took the picture, sitting down on the chair on the porch and leaning forward, looking at the picture. "What about my other kids?" he asked, looking up.
"Don't start this, please." I said, putting my hands up and started walking towards the steps.
"I wanna see them Aileen. I wanna see you." he said, standing up, but right when he was about to start walking; someone walked out the door. Their legs were bare and the only thing they had on was a jacket, halfway zipped, not even to the middle, right under their, well, her boobs.
"Aileen." she said, almost as if she was mocking me.
"Aileen it's not what it looks like.."
"Jacinda." I swallowed and looked back at Ray. He looked shocked more than anything, like everything was ruined. He also looked angry. "Can I see those?" I asked Ray, referring to the pictures. He handed them back to me, and I simply took them and walked back down the porch steps.
