Malec One Shots

19. Potty Mouth (AU)

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Song ~ Alicks - Help Me Out
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Alec laid on his back, holding his phone  above his face as he scrolled through his tumblr. "Hey how's my favourite roommate?" Magnus burst through the door, and Alec groaned. "Fuck off, Magnus." Alec shouted, and carried on scrolling through his tumblr feed. The glittery boy walked towards Alec, kicked his shoes off, and prodded the back of his phone. It fell on Alec's face and he sat up in a rage.

"Magnus you are a pompous bastard you know that right?" He picked a pillow up from behind him and hit Magnus around the head with it. He fell on the floor with a thud. Sometimes having the strength of a boxer was a plus.  "Yes, I do know that. And why such a potty mouth?" He laughed and stood up, flicking Alec's forehead.

Magnus was Alec's roommate. That much was obvious. Magnus was a little shit towards Alec too, he'd make fun of him, mess his side of the room up, tell him spoilers of his favourite shows and books. He made Alec's life a living hell. Even though he was mean like that, when he felt bad for something he did he'd order Alec's favourite takeout food and apologise. That was one of the reasons Alec hated him. One of the other reasons Alec hated him was the fact that he was attractive. Very attractive for that matter. And he had the cheek to change in front of Alec too! He knew Alec was gay as well, so he knew full well what he was doing.

Alec would be lying if he said he didn't have the tiniest feelings for Magnus. Who didn't? Alec had no clue. He never left the dorm of his own will to find out, he only left for classes. The only reason he was surviving was because of Magnus' spontaneous takeout deliveries, his best friend Jace's visits where he'd arrive holding crates of granola bars and a box of Starbucks drinks for Alec to put in the fridge, and his sister doing his laundry when he felt too tired to do it; which was all the time.

Magnus, on the other hand, was the life of the party, literally. He planned raves in his friends sorority houses and family manors. He partied hard and left way too early so he didn't have to clean up afterwards. He had a soft spot for Alec, he had to admit it. The younger had quite an effect on him in more ways than one. Magnus was bisexual. He'd gotten past the awkward testing phase and knew for real that he had no care for who he loved, male or female. He'd only not messed with Alec by going in for the kill because he didn't want to wreck him, didn't want to get with him then break up and hurt the poor boy's heart and have to see his face every day in their room.

Alec sighed. "I should be working on my paper right now now I really can't be bothered.. And I'm too busy reading this manga." He mumbled, and put his phone on his bedside table. Magnus looked up at Alec as he stood at the foot of Alec's bed. "Which manga?" Magnus smirked. Alec laughed. "Like I'd tell you.." He picked his phone back up, clutching it to his chest. "Killing Stalking." Alec whispered, and Magnus chuckled. "Yoonbum kills that whore, you know." Alec shot up at that, and made an angry noise.

"Magnus Bane you fucking dick!" Alec jumped off his bed and ran at the older guy to smack him around the head. Magnus recoiled and clutched his now slightly flatter hair. "Thank you, Alec." Magnus rolled his eyes and watched Alec sit back down, his black hair messy.

Magnus tore his shirt over his head with one arm and flopped down onto his bed, exhaling tiredly. He knew what it did to Alec, and for once didn't care about his reaction. "I swear if I have a phone shaped black eye tomorrow I will personally wring your fucking neck." Alec hummed, going back to whatever he was looking at on his phone. "First of all that would be hilarious, and why not just 'wring' my phone?" Magnus laughed back, the terrible pun making Alec groan. Magnus was happy it was him making Alec groan, but sad that he wasn't making him groan in the way he wanted to. "Again with that potty mouth.. Why do you swear so much Alexander? I'm curious." Magnus sat up, and Alec turned to look at him with an eyebrow raised. "Because it helps me get rid of the uncontrollable urge to smack the fucking shit out of you." Alec coughed matter-of-factly and picked up an empty bottle of water from his nightstand, throwing the plastic object right in Magnus Bane's pretty little face.