So before I update some lyrics and write a poem, I want to say thank you. Thank you for reading this. Self Deception is something I'm so proud of, it's a mindset, and it saved me. I pushed myself to love something when that was the last thing I was capable of doing. I needed this- it not only gave me new avenues of inspiration to explore and a new light to see the world in, it's expressed elements of my own passion and interest. This has changed the way I write, for the better. There's so much depth behind what I do here, and it's endless. It's like I put glasses on and I'm catching analogies and lines and comparisons all around me. And maybe two people give a fuck about this aside from myself and that's fine. I just want you to know what it means for you to vote. And comment, I love the feedback. The theme behind this project suits me so well, in every way. The title itself rejects reality for what you believe to be true, and that sits on a platform of mental illness, but also for anything. The arts, as well. It's almost a religion. I remember planning this book, wanting to not write "pretty" words. Anything but predictable. I wanted a balance between the words being attractive and unattractive. And I think that's me, really. Like some of my character is magnetic, but some of it, I know is hard to handle. I've connected songs to this, I've connected seasons to this. Aesthetics. This has changed me, that's something that I didn't believe art could do, and certainly not my own art. I want you to know this means the world to me, that I truly love this, and any form of appreciation I receive, is absolutely incredible. Thank you. So fucking much.
6-5-17 lyrics | I Can't
I hope she watches you dress
At the edge of her bed
Hope she listens to your concepts
About after death
And I sleep on the floor
Cause I can't be where your body was before
I hope she loves you like I can't anymore
Cause I just can't anymore
I hope she trusts you, cause I can't anymore
Tell me what was the reason for all that you've done?
And we day drink cause without the danger, life isn't fun
We got religion but God ain't the one
Guess we poured like a pitcher, but it was too much
And it's hitting the marble, the countertops
We're coming down swinging, it never stops
We pushed our limits, high to the top
I think I'm tipping, waiting for stars to drop
I think I'm missing, ounces of love
Smoked em last Tuesday, it wasn't enough
I roll it up, I drink it down
You sent these demons to weigh down my clouds,
All of your demons want me to drown,
You want me dead, there is no doubt
I keep your clothes inside of my house,
Waiting to burn em when you come around
I fucking hate you, but love you too much
No equal ratio, that's just my luck
Well I hope she teaches you things about love
(Chorus)
Darling don't go,
Imma need you to answer and talk slow
Tell me who were you with, she said she loved you
Was it just alcohol? That's why she fucked you
Id give a thousand just to touch you,
I'm watching the walls, thinking that they knew
What I couldn't see, deeper within you,
It's all spinning, bet you can sin too
I broke my phone screen, still can't type right
Still can't highlight
All of the mirrors
Nothing makes sense, think I could drink more
The windows are talking, something bout in doors
He can't handle me, reference to doors
I got two doors,
Heaven and hell,
I am a god,
Satan's my dealer but I'll never tell
And I hope you're well, hope she's okay,
When you say it to her, hope you mean what you told me
(Chorus)
- (m.m)
The second verse is a wreck to sort of display being drunk.
Expect a poem soon.
YOU ARE READING
Self Deception
PoetryPoetry 2017 And if I burn out in a fit of psychosis, remember me as a young god, with that smile made of daggers, even if I was the most dangerous thing you could've touched. Perhaps all that danger comes from the multiple personalities, but all I...
