2-8-18
Wish they'd all shut,
Close off like me,
Eye never meant to draw attention
Like blood to a needle,
But there's no hideout for me now.
And he feels it in his body
When I stare, too,
I'm about giving and receiving,
But nothing comes back for me.
Apathy that comes with the peaks,
White caps,
Pale and I'm shaking,
Devil knows there's not much I can't take,
Collapsing over and over but no breaking point,
And he took advantage of that-
Push me hard as fuck,
There are no limits here,
Bruise my knees,
Watch me swim in the purple-
Kurt Cobain and a Marlboro,
I'm awake on the glow,
Empty house but it's never safe
When I'm alone,
Fake the life of the party-
I'm the light show they want,
But never letting in too close.
Stray away from my metaphors,
And flash back to the blood,
Blood blood blood.
I drained like a bathtub,
Nice to think I could be so clean.
But maybe clean is just ignorance
To the dirt we know we see.
Don't act like I'm the crazy one,
I know what's in my head,
And you've barely dared
To understand how bad it is,
What you do.
Got 'em asking questions,
But in my head it's just
WRONG WRONG WRONG
He spoke like the stars sometimes,
It was quiet.
And he'd cough up red,
Make an excuse,
Blame it on celestial elements I don't understand.
But I saw,
Because I view sharper than 20/20,
Their tests and trials
Only angled me to get smarter.
And we can pretend we don't know each other,
But I've been watching the looks
Swimming in you,
Heavier than a dense pigment.
Handling them isn't like you, though,
And I find myself trapped-
Focused on the
Inside and the out.
I'm a display case
And a train wreck.
Prized possession,
Polished and see through,
But your worst nightmare-
Not witty- cunning.
Eye never meant for this,
Eye never asked to be the damage,
Eye sit on my knees,
Always waiting for what happens.
Eyes shut if you're smart,
Cause you crossed lines
And I said I've fucking had it.
⁃ (m.m)
YOU ARE READING
Self Deception
PoetryPoetry 2017 And if I burn out in a fit of psychosis, remember me as a young god, with that smile made of daggers, even if I was the most dangerous thing you could've touched. Perhaps all that danger comes from the multiple personalities, but all I...
