6-15-17
My lover asked for sacrifice,
So I threw up blood-
Bathrooms dripping red,
From what we've done with ourselves.
From your mirror across the wall,
To the shower curtain,
To the handles on the faucet,
To your cologne.
I've stained this place
All of your demons
Drain your face.
My lover asked for promise,
And I gave my word,
Behind screams,
'What's your word ever meant before, you liar? Fucking cheat. Piece of shit.'
'I'd never hurt you' 'remember that one?'
'I'll be awake. I'll stay awake. I won't leave. ILL STAY UP FOR YOU PLEASE DONT KILL YOURSELF I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU IVE SEEN THE WORLD IVE SEEN THIS SHIT YOU CANT GO I NEED YOU WHAT THE FUCK DID THAT MEAN MERANDA? WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO WHY DID HE TIE A NOOSE YOU BITCH DONT BE A PUSSY OWN UP TO YOURSELF WHY THE FUCK HAVE THEY BEEN DROPPING WHY THE FUCK DO YOU TAKE TAKE TAKE YOU THIEF NO WONDER YOUR MOTHER LOOKS AT YOU LIKE SHE DOES YOUVE CAUSED THESE PROBLEMS YOURE THE CHAOS IN THESE DIFFERENT HOUSES BECAUSE YOU NEVER COULD SHUT UP YOU STUBBORN ASSHOLE CANT YOU HEAR EVERYTHING THEYVE EVER SAID TO YOU, LIKE YOUR BODY IS A CHASM AND THEYRE ECHOING, WORDS AND WHISPERS SLITHERING UP TILL THEY SLIT YOUR THROAT FUCK YOU MEAN WORDS NEVER PUSHED SOMEBODY AGAINST THE DOUBT IM STRONG IM STRONG IM STRONG I CANT LOSE IT IM LOSING IT I SEE SUNLIGHT THROUGH YOUR TEETH
my lover asked for the truth,
and I couldn't compose myself,
even with the music running lines in my head like a coke addict hides inside my skull.
I couldn't tell him I loved him,
but I I felt the weight of a stare so heavy,
and I felt the paranoia on the wrong side of your trip,
I want to save you, because watching it isn't easy.
my lover asked for love,
but he knows where to find it,
and if he can't take it from me,
he's got a reputation to fall into.
this is why we're hopeless,
this is what it means to waste away.
My lover asked for time,
But I choked on tree branches,
And rims on nicotine.
I choked on his name,
Because the syllables of another,
Scratched my throat on the way up.
I got dizzy on stars,
Hoping I'd find you there,
And I could stare my eyes glassy,
But I'm fine.
My lover asked for crystal skies,
And I'm the only one who sees pollution.
I have horizons in my breath,
Sunlight leaks through my ribcage,
On an upswing
Of life.
I may be shallow,
But you haven't stepped into the water filling me,
Because I'll drown you,
You'll keep coming back,
And I'll keep my surface reflecting stars,
And maybe, just maybe,
It'll be clear enough for you to come back,
Or maybe you'll see the pollution in everything,
And you'll like me best when I'm honest.
My skies,
I can see spirit hanging from them,
And I'm at a funeral,
That never ends.
I'm not sure when I move,
I'm not sure when I speak,
I'm not sure when all this death
Builds a coffin for me,
Or gives me willpower to leave this room,
This ironic room of deceit and holiness on a lie.
Life's took me for a spin,
Daily now, it seems-
I'll push back harder, motherfucker,
I'll show you what doubt makes of somebody so stubborn.
My lover asked for something real,
And I gave it,
But my lover never believed a thing from my mouth,
Unless it tasted like liquor.
My lover doubted me.
And I loved it.
Join the fucking club.
- (m.m)
Metaphorical. Written to Benz Truck by Lil Peep (I'm fucking obsessed)
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Self Deception
PoetryPoetry 2017 And if I burn out in a fit of psychosis, remember me as a young god, with that smile made of daggers, even if I was the most dangerous thing you could've touched. Perhaps all that danger comes from the multiple personalities, but all I...
