Don't Come Back For Me

Aw Fu*king Yis.

       "(Y/N), come on, eugh let's go already. You're so damn slow." Rick had been complaining the entire time.

       He complained when he woke you up.
       He complained when you took forever getting out of the cruiser.
       He complained when you tripped.
       And he's complaining now.

       You'd had enough. Reaching into your lab coat, you grabbed a small vial and pulled it out, popping the lid off and throwing it at Rick to get his attention. Once he faced you, folding his arms over his chest and glaring, you threw the contents of the vial on him.

       "You need to brighten the fuck up," you watched as silver glitter rained down, covering Rick. "The herpes of crafting supplies. Have fun getting that out, sir." You folded your arms and continued walking, Rick absolutely seething behind you. "What the fuck did you just do?!" He shook his head vigorously, watching glitter rain down in front of him. "(Y/N)!" He screamed your name, running to catch up to you. When he did, he smacked the back of your head, "What the actual fuck, dumbass? I eugh can't get this out!" He held the material of his lab coat away from his body, silver flakes raining all around him.

       You grunted, rubbing your head and continuing to walk. "Stop being a crank-ass, then, and maybe I won't make it worse."

       "It's been eugh four hours, and you're already the biggest pain in my ass." You spun around, giving an exaggerated wink and pointing finger-guns at him, "Ayy. But I'm your favorite pain in the ass, sir." You stuck your tongue out and kept walking, "Besides, four hours isn't nearly enough time for you to get used to this boy." You pointed both thumbs at yourself and cackled wildly, throwing your head back momentarily. Rick sighed heavily and moved forward, grabbing your wrist and sprinting. You kept up with him, stumbling momentarily at the abrupt start.

       Eventually you reached a heavily guarded door. Two massive creatures stood there, in front of the door, and you gaped in awe. This was what you'd always dreamt of!

       However, Rick yanked you away before you could ogle anymore. "We need a distraction."

       "How is this supposed to work?" You glanced up at Rick, raising a brow. Currently, you were without your lab coat, your hair slightly ruffled and your shirt rolled up to expose your stomach, tucked in to mimic breasts. "Trust me, kid, eugh those guys will love this. I won't leave you, don't worry." He lightly pushed you out from behind the wall. You took tentative steps, barely moving. Rick very quickly, and quite literally, kicked your ass, making you let out a yelp of surprise and move within view of the mountainous creatures. They immediately stared down at you, a hard glare in their features, before their gazes softened. The moved closer to you, only standing, in all reality, a foot taller than you. The two were quickly directly in front of you, completely unaware of Rick running past and slipping into the door.

       "What's a pretty little thing like you doing here all alone?" The creatures looked like big rock men, their voices extremely gravelly and deep. One ran a rough finger down your bare stomach, stopping once he'd reached the hem of your jeans.

       Rick, get back here.

       The other creature chuckled darkly, both seeming to enjoy your complacent reaction. The first creature was a simple grey, while the other was a brighter blue. The grey monster reached over and ruffled your hair, tugging on the ends of it. You took in a quick breath, biting your lip. Damn it all, stop. That makes me feel dirty.

       It did, too. You found pleasure in the hair-pulling, but felt nasty when it was a rapey creature doing it. They laughed once more, "I like this one. Doesn't move. But do you scream?"

       As quickly as the creature had dropped your trousers, two shots rang out. Rick stood behind them as their bodies fell to the floor, standing triumphantly. He glanced over at you and his composure changed, now flustered. You pulled your jeans back up, glad they'd gone no further, and adjusted your outfit. The wrinkles in your shirt would smooth out eventually.

       "Took you long enough. The damn things kept calling me 'cute'. I don't do that shit. I... am a man." You imitated the Spongebob episode, raising your hand in the air momentarily. "At least call me pretty." You batted your eyelashes, puffing your lower lip out and clasping your hands at the side of your head before breaking into a fit of laughter.

       You calmed down and found Rick shaking his head in confusion, laughing too. You grabbed your lab coat, "Totally chill with that, but a little warning would've been nice. A little 'hey, they might try to drill ya' woulda been something."

       You slipped your lab coat on, watching Rick's expression turn serious, "Are you eugh shittin' me? You'd be fine if-if I just eugh up and said 'hey they might try to rape you'? What the hell is wrong with you?" He chuckled and walked over to you, "Nice job."

       You followed as he led you back to the ship, "Eh, y'know, you see shit, you get kicked out, a lot of shit builds up, and suddenly you don't give a flying fuck anymore. Don't have friends, but I have enough knowledge to destroy the world. Got enough desire to do it, too." You tapped the side of your head, watching as Rick became lost in thought.

       You both climbed into the cruiser, taking off and heading home.

       "So what was so important, anyway?" Rick shrugged, pulling his lab coat away before grinning, "Ever done Kalaxian Crystal?"

-x-

       Four lines later, you were bouncing off the walls and giggling like a mad man. Your shirt had been tossed somewhere, but you were too busy thinking to worry about that. This was probably why you never did this type of stuff, but something about Rick made you wanna try it all.

       "Jesus, eugh kid, just... just relax." Rick sat in his chair, watching you. He'd done significantly less, dancing around his garage and laughing. He seemed a lot less serious in that moment.

       "Nooooo." You laughed, tossing your head back and throwing your arms in the air. You felt so alive, like you wanted to ride a roller coaster and never get off, or climb a mountain with no gear. You laid on the floor, rubbing your hands up and down your bare sides. "Woah, that feels weird." Everything seemed to feel, sound, and look different. Colors ran together slightly, everything blurry when you turned your head, but fine when you weren't moving.

       Your head snapped up, the blur straightening itself out quickly as you blurted, "You did a no-no in the ship, sir." Your expression turned serious for a moment as you thought of how Rick had suddenly palmed himself with you sitting right there. You laughed after a second, thinking of how that made you feel.

       Rick's face flushed and he pulled out his flask, taking a shaky sip. "It's all good." You laughed again, "Dirty."

       Rick let out a shaky laugh, "Yea, well, eugh you wo-won't remember anything after this." I laughed. "That drug eugh is gonna mess you up. Go easy on it."