Don't Come Back For Me

Confetti! IT'S A PARADE!

       As you whipped your head around to see Rick standing in the living room, you heard a very, very loud pop, followed by a resounding shout.

       You started giggling slightly, looking down and trying not to laugh. But you couldn't help it. You fell to the floor, clutching your sides and screaming with laughter.

       In the living room, confetti was everywhere. Rick had been at the base of the stairs, very near the back of the couch. You rolled around on the floor, unable to stop cackling as tears rolled down the sides of your face.

        You heard a very angry shout before Rick was suddenly in the front room, standing above you. Confetti was practically glued to his hair, his nostrils flaring in anger and rage burning in his eyes. You couldn't take him seriously, the confetti taking the fear factor away.

       You could only laugh harder, now unable to breathe as your stomach began to hurt. You rolled on the floor, "M-Morty, t-" You paused to laugh again, trying to get the words out, "E-E-E *giggle* expl-plain." You could barely speak, burbles of laughter breaking through.

       Morty was giggling, too, "W-Well, (Y/N) an-answered the door, an-and the evil versions of-of us were there. And he," Morty pointed at you, pausing to laugh, "w-was very s-sassy. Evil M-M-Morty liked that and as-asked if he wor-worked for you. He said yea, and th-they wouldn't g-g-go away. S-S-So he pulled out a-a-a bomb, and they left. B-But it wasn't a b-b-bomb, it was th-that!" Morty was roaring with laughter at the end, pointing to the seething Rick with confetti all in his hair, on his face, and covering his lab coat and sweater. You stood up, using the wall to keep you balanced.

       Rick angrily ruffled his hair before he shook like a dog, sending confetti flying everywhere. "I thought eugh we-we were done with eugh this bullshit, (Y/N)!" He didn't look too happy, but little flecks of confetti were still in his brow. Pursing your lips and trying not to laugh anymore, giggles still trying to break through, you reached up and flicked them away. Rick scowled at you.

       "Sorry. But, hey, at least it wasn't a bomb bomb. Just, y'know, a party bomb." You let out a breathy laugh through your nose, looking down and grinning. Rick growled, "I swear eugh to God, you're so fucking eugh annoying."

       "At least I got rid of them!" You protested, now trying to ignore that insult. "And I'm not annoying, you just can't have fun."

       "I know eugh f-for damn sure I can have fun." Rick folded his arms over his chest, frowning heavily at you. "Prove it."

      "I don't eugh ha-have to prove anything to-to you."

       "Then you're lying." You sang out, crossing your arms as well. You stuck your tongue out and grinned, watching Rick pinch the bridge of his nose and grumble. "You're boring. Admit it."

       "M-Morty, go home wi-with (Y/N) eugh a-and wait f-for me to call you. I'm go-gonna eugh set something up, and I don't eugh need you getting in my way." Morty let out a slightly hurt whine, but moved near you. "Go home and-and eugh wait."

        Rick pointed out the door, and you walked outside. "Better be good, sir." You saluted, mocking Rick, before pulling the door shut.

       You hopped into your truck, watching Morty struggle for a moment before he managed to get in and awkwardly adjust his seat belt around him. You drove in relative silence for a while before Morty piped up.

       "So, u-um, I-I'm so-sorry about th-that." In your peripheral vision, you saw him blush with embarrassment. Chuckling, you replied, "Don't worry about it. Besides, I'll always be your friend, no matter what happens. But, uh, don't be doing that again." Morty laughed sheepishly and put his head against the window, watching the houses go by.

       "Alrighty, we are at my humble abode. Gotta warn you, there's a lotta potheads up there." You motioned to the higher levels, "Smells funny. It's not just my apartment." You laughed, leading Morty into the building and up a few flights of stairs. When you reached the door and pressed it open, you allowed Morty to enter first, following in after him. You removed your shoes and walked over to your laptop, "Honey, I'm home!"

       With a chuckle, you pet the top of the laptop before spinning around, finding Morty looking around your home. "So what's Rick got planned? You gotta know at least a little, having been around him much longer."

       "P-Probably a-a-a party." Morty poked through the pile of magazines on your end table. Please say I got rid of the adult mags.

        "Huh." You thought for a moment, Should I dress up, be the chillest dude I can be? Hell yea.

        "Yo, Morty, I'm gonna be right back. Gotta go change and all that." With a wave, you ran into your room and closed the door, rifling through the basket of laundry you'd neglected to fold. "Ha!"

       From within the pile, you extracted two articles of clothing. In your left hand, you held a white shirt with black half sleeves, the words 'If You Turn Your Head to Read This, You Owe Me A Blowjob' printed sideways on the front. In your right hand, you held a simple pair of black shorts. This was your favorite pair, comfy as hell and made your legs look good. Quickly, you slipped into the outfit, tossing your dirty clothes into another basket and sighing. You spritzed some random cologne on yourself, having found it on the floor and enjoying the scent. It was sweet and alluring, yet held a hint of something else, something indescribable. "One things for sure, if I were somebody else, I'd do me."

       You chuckled sardonically. Yea, but I wouldn't stick with anybody. Love is dumb. With a sigh, you sat on the edge of the bed. Ever since the incident with that ass, you haven't really been able to find it likely that you would ever want to enter into another relationship ever again. Sure, you'd fool around, but you'd never stick around too long. Just the way it worked with you.

       Hesitantly, you stood, brushing your hand through your hair as you opened the door and exited the room. Morty was on the couch, talking on his phone. You went over and pulled on your black converse and found a few braided bracelets.

       "Hmm..." You slipped several on, reading the quotes made from added beads. "I'm Not Okay", "BVB", "If You're Happy and You Know It, Shut Up". Those three quotes were on black string, now adorning your left arm.

       "Noice." You wandered back over to Morty, giving your reflection in the blank tv screen a once over. "O-O-Ok, b-bye." Morty hung up the phone before staring at you. He moved to say something but stopped, looking down at the shirt. He tipped his head and read it before his face was bright red. You laughed, "Yea, no. It's really great though!"

       Morty looked away, covering his mouth for a moment before standing. "U-Uh, that was R-Rick. H-He said to-to come home n-now." Your mouth fell open, "Already?! Is he a magician?!" You screeched.

       Morty shrugged and you led him back to the garage, hopping into your truck. "Before we go, I wanna grab something. I'm hangry." You patted your belly with a laugh and took off towards the land of fast food.