Things you've never had // Ed Sheeran

Brother's smile

Hi there, dear readers! This chapter isn't that interesting, but I hope you'll enjoy it anyways.
And I just wanted to let you know that we are not so far from the end of this story.
Just a few more chapters, haha.
Anyways, please leave me a comments and votes if you want to.
Remember: Any kind of feedback is more than welcomed here!
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We both suddenly heard a sound of car and sooner than we'd expect there was a car heading to us with reflectors shining into our faces.

I swear we both had never jumped away from someone so quick as we did when we heard Matt's car coming to us.

I hugged myself with my arms, nervously as I stepped away from Ed.

I took a side look at him, he was just standing there, scratching the back of his neck nervously, his eyes never leaving the ground.

Then the car finally stopped and I saw him.

Matt.

I couldn't believe it's really him.
When I was leaving this place Matt was skinny, tall guy with no beard or nothing like this and look at him now; he's even taller than I remember and the most of his body are muscles, but what shocked me the most was that he let himself grew a pretty beard.
If it wouldn't be his dark brown hair and those amazingly blue and always amused eyes I wouldn't recognize him.

"Matt.." I heard myself yelping like a little girl and then I had to jump on my brother and hug him so tightly as if he'd fly away if I didn't hold him tight.

"Hi, Chloshy.." He mumbled and I could almost hear his smile when I pressed my face into his parka jacket.

And so we were standing there, just simply enjoying  each other without a word, the fact is we had never needed conversation to speak with each other.
When Matt look at me it's always enough for me to know what to do or what does he think and so on.
Or at least it used to be like this before I moved out.

I breathed in his sweet accent, which wasn't anything else but wood sawdust, fume and a bit of sweat.
It was so pleasant to smell this again.
His presence brought me back to our past, suddenly I felt like a little girl again.
But not that scared little mess but that happy giggling little girl from happy memories with Matt by my side.

After a while Matt pushed me a bit away, just enough to see my face and gave me one of his looks I had never seen before, the one which was filled with a thousands of questions.
I suddenly knew that he wanted to ask how I've been and if I'm happy and so many others but we didn't have a time for this little things.
For this small talk.

I broke out an eye contact with Matt to find out what was Ed doing, just to check out of he's alright.

He was sitting on Matt's car hood, holding a tissue on his upper lip, he tried not to stare at us, but somehow his eyes always ended locked on us.

Sweet...

"Is he your boyfriend?" Matt asked me with a little chuckle when he found out where I was looking.
I redded immediately and looked down on my shoes to avoid an eye contact with Matt.

"No, he's just a friend.." I mumbled, feeling a lot awkward, we had never spoken about relationships and this convo was a way too much uncomfortable for me, especially when it involved Ed.

"If you say so.." Matt chuckled again and dropped this topic as he started to look for something in pockets of his jacket.

"Here, that's my current number, call me in any case." Matt imprited a little paper to my shaking palm.

"No, Matty listen to me, come with us, you can't comeback there!" I insisted, panic attack near to me, as I put that paper in the pocket of my jacket.

Matt only smiled on me, the same way he used to smile when we were just kids, it was that smile with whom he protected me all the way through my childhood.

"You two should go before he'll pass out." Matt laughed a bit, pointing on Ed who was trying so desperately seem like he wasn't interested in what were we talking about.

"No! Matt, please come with us! Going back there isn't safe!" I begged him and felt tears on my cheeks.

"Chloshy, I'll take care of myself." He smiled again, slightly wiping off of my face tears.

"Please..." I yelped totally broken by this situation.

He pulled me into his arms, holding me tightly.
I started to cry out loud, this hug was so hopeless and full of consciousness that this is probably the last time we see each other, cause I won't comeback here and he'll never leave a father's house.
We were standing there like that for a couple of minutes.
And I felt like a shit for leaving him here again, that I run away, and he has to stay there.

He is my older brother for god's sake! Only thanks to him I am now here, how can I just walk away??

"Promise, you'll call me as soon as you'll get anywhere you call 'home'." Matt mumbled, slightly pushing me away from his chest, just to see my face.
Eyes watering.

"I promise." I sobbed, looking down at my dirty shoes, I knew he won't go with us, but still it hurt like a hell.

"Chloshy, I'll be okay." He said again, with a little smile playing on his lips.

"I know.." I mumbled.

"C'mon, you should rather go." Matt pushed me closer to our car.

I didn't say a word, I just came to car's door.

"You're a right man, it was pleasure to meet you." Matt told to Ed with his low english skills, as he shaked his hand.

"You too, I hope we'll meet again." Ed smiled on my brother and stood up.
And right in that moment Matt pulled Ed closer to him and whispered something to his ear.
Ed's eyes flicked on me for a while, then Matt pulled himself away and they were looking at each other for a while, in that moment special male bond rised between them.
They both respected each other and understood each other on the way only men can understand each other.
I was watching them nervously, breathless.

Then Ed nodded and they laughed a little, before he went to our car.
He sat down on the driver's place, but I was still standing there, car doors still open on my side, I was watching Matt, and I knew that no matter what he was promising to me, I'll never see him again.
He smiled on me once again the way older brothers smiling on their little sisters, before I finally sat down in the car.

Ed took a last quick look at Matt, before we finally moved.

Matt was standing there, hands in his jeans' pockets, majestatic and brave man on the dust road.
I was watching him till we left behind a first turn...