Breakeven

Chapter 17

The doorbell ringing made me jump.

"Mum, the pizzas are here, can I answer the door?" Adam shouted from downstairs.

"I'm coming now" Danny shouted back before getting out of bed and pulling on some black jeans and a clean t-shirt. "You'd better get dressed" he said as he leaned over to kiss me before running downstairs to pay for the pizza for the kids.

I got out of bed and went back to the wardrobe to choose my outfit for tonight. After dressing and refixing my hair I went downstairs where the kids were happily tucking into their food.

The doorbell rang again and I went to answer it. I let Mark and Rina in, hugging them both as they passed me.

"Great, pizza, where's mine?" Mark teased the kids as he went into the kitchen, they weren't ready to share their food.

"You're not having pizza Uncle Mark, we've made your dinner" Jessica told him

"You made it?" Mark questioned.

"Well Dad told us what to do but we all helped" Adam added

"I'm sure it will be delicious" Mark said to them

Danny passed drinks to Mark, Rina and I and then we left the kids and went through to the living room.

"Chuck your phone over Mark, we'll listen to your music" I said, Mark has some great music on his phone.

"Why Kay? Because your music taste is questionable?" He asked sarcastically.

"Well I've got all of your albums on there so yeah, I guess my music taste is questionable" I joked.

"Funny" he replied as he threw his phone at me and I put it in the docking station and hit shuffle play.

We sat with our drinks just catching up with each other until Glen and Sophie arrived shortly after, I let them in and went to get them some drinks from the kitchen just as the kids were finishing up their food. I poured the drinks for Glen and Sophie and asked Adam to take them through to the living room for them while I cleared away the empty boxes from the takeaway.

"Right you lot, upstairs and don't forget to brush your teeth" I told the kids.

"Mum, can we have popcorn for watching the film?" Jessica asked.

"You can't still be hungry?" I asked, there was enough food ordered to feed a small country.

"No but we can't watch a film without popcorn Mum" Jessica told me as if I was stupid for not realising this.

"OK, I'll make you some and bring it up for you, if you all go now" I said and Alleysha and Jessica came to give me a hug before they went upstairs.

Adam came back into the kitchen, "Mum can I just go in the music room tonight, I don't want to watch the film that Jessica chose?" he asked me.

"OK, but you need to go up to bed by 9:30" I told him. I saw him twisting his face as he hates having a bed time but he is really as bad as Danny when he goes into the music room, he has no concept of time. He reluctantly agreed and gave me a hug before leaving the kitchen again.

I took out a pan and melted some coconut oil before adding the corn and waiting for it to pop. I hate making popcorn because I always get nervous that I'll run out of space in the pan before it's finished popping. I was watching the pan intently when Danny came through to the kitchen to see what I was doing.

"I'm just making this for the girls, I won't be long" I told him.

He went to the fridge and took out more beers, "How are you feeling about telling them?" I asked him. Danny just pulled a face that let me know that he wasn't looking forward to it.

"They'll be fine about it you know" I tried to reassure him.

"Yeah, I know, just let me tell them in my own time" he asked, I nodded, taking the pan off the heat and going to find a bowl.

I took the popcorn upstairs to the girls who were settled in Jessica's bed and then returned to the living room.

"Sorry about that, just had to get the kids sorted" I said to Glen and Sophie before I sat down on the arm of Danny's chair. "What's new then?" I asked.

"Nothing really" Glen replied "The treatments going well but Soph has to go back to the states for a few weeks and I'm just trying to get the all clear from the doctors for me to fly so that I can go with her, talk about stress"

"So, are you gunna be able to go?"

"Dunno, they should let me know soon, I hope so." He told me. "What about you?"

"Ah, you know, same old" I replied, realising quickly how evasive I had been about that question but I couldn't really tell him what I've been doing for the last few weeks because Danny wants to be the one to tell them about his addiction. I looked at Danny but he quickly changed the subject.

It was a fun night, dinner was delicious and I really enjoyed the company for the evening but I could feel myself becoming more and more agitated as the night went on and Danny still hadn't said anything. We exchanged a few glances throughout the night but each one from Danny said 'Not yet', until there was no time left and I was seeing Mark, Rina, Glen and Sophie to the door.

"We really need to do this more often." Rina said as she was leaving.

"Definitely, thanks for coming"

I closed the door behind them and turned to look at Danny.

"It wasn't the right time" he said as we walked over and wrapped his arms around me.

I felt exhausted, I knew I couldn't carry this much longer on my own. "When will be the right time Danny?" I asked as I realised there was no 'right time'.

"Soon" was his only reply.

I sighed as I pulled out of his arms and went upstairs to bed.