Breakeven

Chapter 81

"I can't though Kay, I can't have this baby" she said. I've lost count of how many times she's settled on an answer and then changed her mind.

"Sophie, how far gone are you?" I asked, starting to feel as though she's had this argument with herself countless times before.

"17 weeks" she said, looking slightly embarrassed. "But I've only known for about 4"

I shook my head, unable to prevent the reaction when I realised that she was carrying a fully formed baby and an abortion would include having to give birth.

"You can't imagine aborting that far into pregnancy, can you?" she asked.

"Honestly Sophie, no I can't" I told her. "But I'm not you, and you said you didn't want to know what I would do"

"I need to get this booked in, don't I? Would you come with me?" she asked.

"Soph, you don't have to do anything until you're totally sure." I told her, really not wanting to force her into a snap decision. "Take some time, think about everything. At least now you've got someone you can talk to" I reasoned.

"No, I've dragged this on long enough, I need to make the decision and I know that the right decision is to not have this baby" she said with a new determination which scared me slightly.

"Why aren't you drinking then?" I asked her, not wanting to talk her out of the abortion but unable to shake the feeling that there was a small part of her that wanted her baby.

"I dunno" she said with no emotion "I suppose it felt like the right thing to do while I was considering my options."

"But you're definitely decided?" I asked, hoping she would change her mind.

She nodded.

"Let's get some shots then" I said as I gestured to call a waiter over.

The waiter came over to the table, "Can we get 2 tequilla shots" I said to him, he nodded and went to get the order. I watched Sophie shifting uncomfortably in her seat and felt a small amount of relief.

Moments later the waiter returned placing down the tequilla shots, freshly cut limes and salt.

I lifted one of the shots before saying "Cheers", it felt so wrong but I knew that this had to be Sophie's decision and as her friend I had to support her.

Sophie slowly picked up her shot and clinked her glass to mine. I threw the shot back quickly before placing the lime in my mouth but as I focussed back on Sophie, I realised that she hadn't drunk her shot. I watched as she kept moving the glass slightly towards her lips before pulling back again, I could see the inner turmoil she was feeling.

Eventually Sophie put the shot down on the table, untouched. I quickly lifted it, before she could change her mind and knocked it back.

"So not totally decided?" I said taking her hand in mine.

"If I can't even drink a shot, then I can't have a termination" she said, despair in her voice.

I nodded, not wanting to put any words in her mouth. "I need to tell Glen don't I?" she asked.

"I think so" I said with a smile.

"Kay, thank you" she whispered.

"Soph, you made that decision" I told her, feeling relieved that my dangerous plan had worked out how I'd hoped.

"No really, I don't know how I can ever thank you enough for what you've just done" she said sincerely.

"Don't give it another thought" I told her sincerely "But if the baby's a girl, you could maybe call her Kay?" I laughed.

We paid the bill and decided it was time to get out of the restaurant. I followed Sophie, zig zagging through the tables as we headed for the door. Suddenly I heard someone calling my name and turned in confusion, I recognised the voice but couldn't place it.

"Oh my god, hi, how are you, what are you doing here?" I asked as I saw the familiar face. He was sat at a table with around 20 other guys, I turned to make sure Sophie realised that I had stopped and saw her coming back towards me.

"I'm good, really good" he said with a smile "Wow, I really didn't expect to run into you here. Do you fancy going and grabbing a drink?"

"I'd love to" I said, feeling slightly uncomfortable "But we're just heading over to the arena now, maybe another time?"

"That's a shame" he said, a sadness in his eyes making me realise that I had made the right decision.

"Soph, this is Liam, he was Adams consultant in hospital" I said as Sophie joined me at the table.

"Nice to meet you" Sophie nodded politely.

"How about a photo with the stag?" One of the guys at the table shouted over as he stood up and held his phone ready to take the snap.

I laughed, "Who's the stag?" I asked looking around the table.

Liam stood up and wrapped his arm around my waist, "smile" he whispered as the photo was taken.

"Congratulations" I said feeling slightly shocked.

"I'd end it all for you though Kay" he whispered before kissing my cheek.

I couldn't even acknowledge what he had just said. "Well have a great night, and all the best for the wedding" I said with a forced smile before grabbing Sophie's hand and getting out of the restaurant as quickly as I could.