Once Upon A Moonlight✅ {BOYXBOY}

Chapter 13: Conflicted

Word Count: 1429.

FRED'S POV:

The icy wind gnawed away at us mercilessly- which isn't surprising because it's November- as we darted from one side of the pitch to the other. Despite the conditions, all of us players were drenched in sweat but nobody was going to back down. 

We were tied with two goals each, both of which I managed to score for my team. I knew we were nearing the end of the match by how violent it started getting. I skillfully dodged one of their defenders and steadily aimed a kick for their goal. It went in and the crowd watching the match erupted into cheers when the whistle blew, signalling the match's end. 

I scanned said crowd and saw eventually saw Sam sitting alone in one of my hoodies and he too was cheering. I made eye contact and smiled. He waved at me gave me a thumbs up, wincing slightly at the loud cheers that surrounded him.

I suppose you're wondering why Sam is watching the match anyway. You see I'd dragged him along with me to the game because I didn't want him to be alone all day and with Emily away, that's exactly what he was going to have been. I knew this wasn't his kind of scene: the noise, bustle of people, close proximity to others, but it seemed he still enjoyed himself. Although now that I actually thought about it, it was an incredibly risky idea since not only was he extremely socially anxious but some boys from our science class at school played on my team too.

Speaking of boys from our science class, it was time to get some answers out of Mike...

As I stepped into the locker room, the putrid smell of sweat hit me like a wall. The rest of my team were already shirtless, circled around our Coach. I quickly joined them, smiling at my team proudly.

"Everybody performed fantastically today, keep this up and you'll be at the top of the league in no time!" our Coach praised and various 'cheers' and 'hell yeah' could be heard around the room. 

To be honest I thoroughly enjoyed being captain of the school's soccer team. It was a role I took very seriously and poured many hours into. I'd been a part of the team since ninth grade and became a captain in eleventh - quite the feat for a younger age than most. I had kept it up with the hopes of getting a scholarship by the end of it.

Our team had remained mostly the same over the years, only a few members leaving when they finished their final year of high school. They were all well-disciplined and skilled - par the old co-captain that I managed to get kicked off the team after what he did to Emily. That was when Mike took up the role of co-captain and he was pretty good at it.

After everyone was changed people began to leave. I said my goodbyes to Ryan and Oli, who were off to meet up with Charlotte, and spotted Mike making his way towards the door. I stepped in front of it and crossed my arms.

"Oh hey man, good job out there! The team were great, too." Mike greeted. "What's up?" 

Mike asked and I took a deep breath.

"I wanted to talk to you about Sam," I replied and a few of his mates came to his side.

"What about that faggot?" One of them asked and I clenched my fists. "Don't tell me you beat him up without us?" 

Mike laughed at them and I glared at him.

"No. Why would I-" I began but was interrupted once again by another boy.

"Oh, I know! You're pretending to be his bud so you can bring him down hard, aren't ya?" They asked and I didn't know how to respond. 

I couldn't believe what I was hearing, how many people in my team and at school are homophobic? I felt myself become hot under the collar, their words resonating with me and not just because they were about Sam. Mike must've sensed my unease as he narrowed his eyes at me.

"Wait... don't tell me you've actually gone and became friends with it? Or perhaps you're one of them? Has it already infected you with the gay disease?" Mike interrogated and advanced forward. 

I felt rage surge through me. 

Nobody talked about my best friend like that. Besides what was wrong with being gay? 

Love was love, right? 

"What difference does it make if I had?" I asked, almost bewildered. "And how can you say that when you're girlfriend is Emily, Sam's friend?"

"Because nobody wants gay captain on the team, they want someone they can trust."

I inwardly flinched, my rage falling as another of Mike's friends spoke and my emotions becoming conflicted.

If I got kicked off the team my plans for a scholarship would be over.

"Emily seemed fed up with Sam, too, back in science class. Why else would she have outed him like that?" Mike suggested. "And if people find out they'll never forgive the kid for making the soccer captain gay." 

Was that why Emily had distanced herself from Sam?

"So?" I countered pathetically, the last of my confidence dwindling.

"So, they'll make sure Sam knows that," Mike explained as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "Painfully."

Was that true?

I hadn't helped matter with the drunken kiss that went viral but for the most part, the aftermath of it had been somewhat tame. If what Mike said was true, me being friends with Sam put him in grave danger and would lose my team's respect - possibly even my chance at a scholarship? 

Surely defending Sam was more important? 

But I'd spent far too long working for my reputation, too. Sam's was my best friend, pretty much had been for as long as I could remember and I always thought I was protecting him. Yet Mike made me think that by being close to him I was putting him in danger. I felt my brain become strangled by panic as my mind filled with confusion and of course, me being the brainless idiot I am, said this:

"Of course not! Who'd want to be friends with him?" I said through gritted teeth and instantly felt guilt stab me in the chest. The others laughed in relief and Mike patted me on the shoulder.

"Though that's not a bad plan if that's what you're doing, it's the least the worthless fag deserves." Mike said, referring to the plan one of his 'friends' accused me of carrying out earlier. "If I were you though, I'd keep my distance from him. Not worth the risk of infection."

I simply stood there for a moment, Mike and his friends pushing past and leaving. moved out of the way. 

What had I just done? 

I'd just put Sam in serious shit and for what? The possibility that I would make things worse?

For my scholarship? 

Why the hell didn't I defend him? 

I left the room and went outside and quickly found Sam waiting for me beside my dad's car. He was smiling but it quickly dissipated when Mike also approached, saying something to Sam. I could feel the hatred and disgust oozing off the others watching the exchange and that's when I realised. 

The only way to protect him was to distance myself from him. 

I didn't want to but it was the only way for him to stay under the radar and be safe, plus it'd mean I could have a say on what they do. Yeah, that was it. Right? All those doubts and memories of nights spent with Sam filled my mind and I took my anger about them on the ground as I stomped towards them, Mike leaving Sam before I could reach them.

I walked up to the driver's door and got in after bluntly telling Sam to '"get in" and started the car, quickly driving away in silence. It stayed that way for a while but eventually, Sam broke said silence.

"You were great out there today! So we still going out tod-" he started but I interjected.

"I have some stuff to do. I'll take you back to my place so you grab your stuff and then I'll take you home." I said and continued looking at the road but I could still see Sam's hurt expression in the corner of my eye.

//

REVISITED: 23/06/2021