Clace (Liberty High School) (Completed)

31. The Relapse

Clarissa

We sit through social studies, and I can feel Jace's eyes watching me. I do my best not to look at him, knowing it will only encourage him.

We make it to English with minutes to spare. Jace texts me.

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(Jace is bold. Normal font is Clarissa)

Red, I really want to kiss you right now. :(

No pda at school! You're going to have to wait, until later.

Aw.... ;( Come on! The music room is empty during lunch.

Empty....

Ha! I knew you'd come around to the idea.

Maybe....we can go to the music room at lunch...but no pda!

Okay....

I'll talk to you later... :)

Bye ;)

The bell rang and everyone sat in their places. We talk about grammer, and I draw in my sketchbook. Yearning to draw all of the curves and edges on Jace's face. Stop! You can't! Not now! People will see! I decide to just experiment with a flower. Class ends, and I'm off to art.

"Red," Jace whispers in my ear by the art room.

"Jace, I said no pda!" I whisper yell.

"That was nothing," Jace smiles. "I was just trying to get your attention." Why is he so hot? Ugh!

"We need to get to class," I reply, and we take our seats in the art room. We have a lot of work to catch up on, since our "innermost selves" project is due tomorrow."

"Can you text your mom. See if you can come over after school and stay over?" Jace asks. "I have a feeling this project is going to take an all-nighter and a lot of coffee."

"Yeah, I'm sure she'll be fine with it. But...I don't think the project will take too long, so maybe we can do other stuff after we finish," I tease and bite my lip.

"I'm sorry, but I've got a girlfriend, and she probably wouldn't like it if I did "other stuff" with anyone other than her," Jace jokes right back. Well played! Well played!

"We'd better get back to work, Jace. That is if you want to get to "other stuff" tonight," I reply. With my threat, he's get back to work. The rest of class is spent organizing the rest of the project.

In math, we review for a systems quiz.

Lunch

I decide not to sit next to Jace today. Trying to avoid suspicion is easier when your partner in crime isn't holding your hand under the table. Izzy still keeps looking at Jace and then at me. It's like she can tell! Simon and her seem to have gotten more "friendly." Alec and Magnus are quietly discussing....appropriate topics to discuss in public...ouch, good luck Alec. Magnus is a wild one. So....I'm eating my pizza and guess who taps my shoulder...Sebastian!

"Clarissa, hey. How come you aren't sitting with me again?" Sebastian asks. Is he serious? Does he really not remember Wednesday night? Was he that intoxicated?

I can see Jace's arms stiffen and I regret not sitting next to him. From this far away, I can't grab his hand and calm him down. Well....it looks like I'm going to have to defuse the situation the hard way. "Sebastian were done! I broke up with you Wednesday night! Remember?" I ask genuinely interested if he remembered.

"Clarissa, you need to think about this. I'm the only one who wants you; it's me or no one," Sebastian begins. "No one wants to date you! You're literally the last person anyone would want to date."

He's right! No one wants to date me! Jace thinks he does, but he'll get over it. "You know what? I don't think you're worth it. You hear me, I'm breaking up with you." I get up and run to the bathroom. Please don't follow me! Please don't follow me! Please don't follow me! I chant as I run. Unfortunately, because this is life, and it sucks, I hear footsteps approaching me. I don't have to look back to know who's trying to catch me, it's Jace. The way he makes up for lost time and almost reaches me as I open the door. Even though I got at least a 10 second head start, only proves what I already knew.

"Red, I...I'm coming in," Jace nervously stutters.

"Jace I'm fine, really," I lie as I find a razor in my backpack.

"Red, are you still clothed?" Jace questions. It's now or never, if I don't cut, he's going to stop me. I need to feel that relief. Pulling my jeans down, I slice a line in my leg. When I don't answer, Jace hesitates. Eventually, he must decide that the risks outweigh the consequences because he barrels in.

He sees my leg, takes the blade without looking at me, grabs a towel, and proceeds to clean my leg. I've messed it up. Not even a day I've been his girlfriend, and I've already done something wrong! "Red, please. You cannot turn to a blade. I know it hurts, but this isn't a healthy way to alleviate the pain. Please, just talk to me. I'll always be here to listen. You can yell at me if it helps, but please don't leave me without a way to help you," Jace calmly requests. His voice may be calm but his pulse is speeding, and his golden orbs are mercilessly staring at my cut.

I start sobbing and Jace holds me in his arms. "Jace, I'm sorry. I know that cutting myself isn't going to help, but it makes the pain go away for a while," I cry. "Sebastian, he's...he's right. No one wants me. I know...you think you do, but Jace you could do so much better. Jace, any girl in this school would gladly go out with you, and all of them are prettier than me."

"Red, I want you. There is NO GIRL that could ever be prettier that you. You don't see how beautiful you are," Jace responds. "Where do I even start."

*********Ring*****Ring *********

"I guess I'll have to finish my conversation about your body later," Jace winks. I mange to get my tears under control. Then, I'm off to science and he's off to math.

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I do not own any of the Mortal Instruments books, materials, etc. All credit belongs to Cassandra Clare.

Author's Note:
This is my first fanfic. I hope you guys like it! Please leave comments, votes, and feedback. I'm going to update, when I'm done and it'll be random.

Originally posted: 2/1/18